Art comes in many forms
by Graceful One
Summary: Tattoo artist and Veteran Jasper meets artist Bella a NYU grad student. What happens when two people who are open to something more get thrown by the trails in life. Rated M for language and sexual content. Hardcore Jasper x Bella
1. Permanent Markings

AN: I'm BACK with another Jella story so this one is complete 17 chapters all about 3000 words a chapter. I hope y'all enjoy this story I may write another maybe not don't know yet. This is another I will post whenever let me know what you think as reviews usually make me post faster.

This is a mistake we should not be doing this but I want to. I want this and so as a free woman, I will do it.

"Rose, your dad will kill you if you get this tattoo you know that right," I tell her because while my parents won't be excited her dad will flip his shit.

"Who gives a damn if daddy likes it. He liked Royce and we see how great he was." Rose says as we walk into Red Rocker ink.

"Welcome to Red Rocker how may I help you ladies?" Says the tiny woman standing in front of the front desk moving around papers. Her arms are covered in ink and she has a barbell through her eyebrow.

"Yes, I would like to get a tattoo." Rose says walking up to the counter. The woman nods and walks to the computer. She does some typing and looks up at me.

"It looks like Jasper has some free time let me go talk to him. I am Alice can you guys have a seat I will be right back." She says walking toward the back where the doors are. About that time the bell over the door dings and a mountain of a man in a sweeping snow out of his hair.

"Damn it is cold out there why in the hell did I move to New York." Says the man not looking up. He pulls off his scarf and jacket hanging them in a closet when he turns he looks right at Rose and stops his eyes go wide and the deep dimples in his cheeks show themselves.

"Are you ladies here to get tattooed?" The big guy asks and I point at Rose because I can hear the tattoo gun and I think I am copping out.

"Yeah we want the same tattoo my friend Bella here already has a drawing." Rose says in a confident voice pointing over at me. She has her sexy smirk on and I have to not smile because if Rose wants him come hell or high water she will have him. She can be a shark.

"Alrighty then lets see the design I have no appointments for a few hours. I may be able to get you both in." He says winking at Rose and turning to me. I open my messenger bag and pull the drawing that I drew for an assignment that I had. It was a drawing that was to represent the person that meant the most to us. I drew entwining limbs and two hummingbirds sitting on them in the feathers are words woven in. Friend, loyal, gracious, humble, sister, The Hummingbirds are facing one another.

"Hey Emmett nice of you to come to work." A blond man with a southern drawl long hair and a beard says. Him and the big guy share what I like to say is a bro hug, aka half hug back pat thing.

"Alice tells me that Y'all are looking for tattoos. I have don't have anymore appointments for the day. Do you have a." He is cut off by Emmett handing him my drawing. He takes it and looks over it closely making me blush a little.

"That is a great drawing I am guessing you are Bella." Emmett says poking his hand in my direction. I take the proffered hand and realize quickly that he really is a giant.

"Thanks and I am Bella an art student at NYU." I say the drawing is complicated and it got me an A. This that I gave them is an enhanced photograph of the original because I framed the original and gave it to Rose as a Christmas present.

"Emmett is right this is a great drawing cool concept. Do you both want the same thing and where are you looking at putting it. I am Jasper by the way." He reaches out toward me and shake my hand. His skin is warm and he gives me butterflies.

"Rose and I would like one half of it each this is my half and the other is hers. I would the colors in blues a blended look like the photo." I say pointing to the bird on the left.

"I want it on my ribs on my left side." I point to ribcage and Jasper grimaces.

"I want the bird in purples and maybe a spot of red. Same place as Bella on my right side." Rose says.

"Okay, ladies if Y'all are good with it then Bella I will take you and Emmett take Rose and discuss these further and make a plan," Jasper says stepping back and gesturing for me to follow him.

"Have fun Bella I will see you in a few huh." She says with a kiss to my cheek and a wink. I nod because I am petrified honestly. Jasper sits me down in what looks like a dentists chair and goes to his scanner scans the photo in and sits down at his computer.

"You want this one right and a colored pencil texture in the color?" Jasper asks as he crops the photo at my nod and he nods as well.

"Is this your first tattoo?" He asks turning from the computer to the printer and pulls the bottom of his sweater up and over his head pulling the bottom of his shirt up in the process revealing tattooed skin on his stomach. My thighs clinch at the ink because come on tattoos are hot as fuck and as an artist myself I love them.

"Nope I have a poppy on my shoulder and a compass rose on my side." I say to him trying my damnedest not to stare. He is covered in ink one whole entire arm to his wrist is tattoos and his fingers are tattooed with the words hold fast. I can see a tattoo peaking out above his shirt collar even.

"Good because this particular place is painful and very hard to tattoo. Now that being said I can do it but the type of coloring you want the smooth saturation is hard in a place like this. So if we were to move it to a meatier place like the thigh that would give the colored pencil look that you're wanting." Jasper tells me and I appreciate his candor.

"Okay well let me talk to Rose this is her first and see if I can get her to change the placement," I tell him and he nods.

"I will draw this up want this branch and all as well as this size right?" Jasper says and I nod and head out the door toward the sound of Rose's voice she is currently laughing I knock lightly on the door and open it.

"Hey lady, Jasper said that the color would be better in a more meaty spot so what do you think about the outside of your thigh. It also won't hurt as bad there." I say and she looks at Emmett for confirmation and he nods as well.

"Okay that's fine Emmett said he can probably only finish the outline today but I will need to come back to do color." She tells me.

"Sounds like a plan if you need me I will be down the hall," I tell her looking at her smirking because her cheeks are flushed.

"I will take care of her don't worry," Emmett tells me patting her leg and I nod at him and head back to Jaspers room.

"Yeah I have a client now about 4 to 5 hours depending on how much pain she can take. She is hot maybe I should draw it out." He pauses on the phone then laughs out.

"You will not come by the shop to see her asshole." I knock on the wall letting him know I am there I feel kinda bad for eavesdropping however the knowledge that he thinks I am hot wipes that away quickly. I mouth sorry for him and grab my wallet out of my bag and point to the front he nods at me.

"Hey I need to sign the papers for Jasper but I am going to run down to 7/11 to get a drink and one for Rose," I tell Alice who grabs her wallet from her desk.

"Mind if I come with I am starving," Alice says and I smile at her and nod.

"That will be $7.15." I grab a ten and hand it to him. I ended up buying drinks, gum and peanut butter crackers for Rose just incase. He hands me my change.

"Do you work at New Moon?" Alice asks me on our walk back.

"I used too yeah but, I work uptown now at a friends gallery."

"I love that place we go all the time. I thought you looked familiar. " Alice says.

"Yeah I know the owner I worked there as an undergrad." I tell her my first 4 years at NYU I worked at a bar not far from campus as a waitress and fill in bartender. When a former grad student I knew opened an art gallery uptown he offered me a job and I took it. Walking back in to the shop I hear the hum of a tattoo machine and Jasper is standing at the desk. Alice hands him a soda and he hums in appreciation.

" I thought you skipped out on me." He says to me handing me the filled out paperwork.

"Not at all I have checked out your work online I was hoping you would be free today and if not I would have waited for an appointment. I don't run scared it's not in my nature." I look up and him and meet his eyes. He grins wide at me teeth and all.I look down and sign my name. I am shaking from head to toe I always feel this way before I get tattooed I love the art but hate the process of getting tattooed.

"Right this way my lady." Jasper says in a surprisingly good English accent holding his arm out toward his door. Luckily I have worn a dress today and it will be a cold walk home with no leggings but a dress will do.

"Okay well pants off and hop up." Jasper says patting his chair. His tray already has everything out on his table.

"Does that usually work for you? Take off you pants I mean it's not very original and you're an artist after all." I tell him kicking off my boots and pulling my pants off. I hear his breath hitch and I don't look up because I am not usually so brazen but the knowledge that he likes the way I look makes me this way.

"Not that I have never used it as a pick up but maybe I should try sometime." He says to me. The chair is leather and cold against my skin. I suck in a breath at the coldness on my legs.

"I know its cold but once we start tattooing you will warm up. Did you get yourself something with some sugar in it?" He asks grabbing the hand-drawn stencil that he took off my picture he is a fabulous artist he capture all of the small details that I put in it.

"Yup I did this isn't my first go around," I say to him pointing to the OJ that I have. He nods at me in reply and it's odd to have this comfort with someone I just met is odd.

"Thank you for bringing in an original piece of art I mean that as a tattoo artist in NYC I get a lot of generic shit." He says pushing my dress up to my hip and slaps his gloves on grabs the antiseptic.

"Where on your thigh do you think? Emmett is putting your friends on about here." He says and points to a place on my leg. I take and point to a place a little higher and he nods. He sprays that place and rubs it with a paper towel I jump a little because the antiseptic is cold. He puts the stencil over the place on my thigh and looks up at me confirming that its right and I nod. He presses it down slowly making sure that there are no wrinkles and runs his hand over it a few times. He leaves it on and rolls back to his tray and starts shaking blues.

"I am going to mix up some different blues to blend once I have the outline done. If you're doing well after the outline and you want to continue then we will." He says to me raising his eyebrow.

"I love shading so I will hold out for that." I say and he shuts his eyes for a second and smirks. I grab my phone and ear buds loud music is what I need because I don't like the sound of needle to skin.

"Lets get this show on the road then." He says reaching over and starts pulling on the stencil. He finishes and points to the mirror I hop up holding my dress up so I can see the stencil and I don't smudge it.

"Perfect Jasper." I can see what it is going to be and I can't wait. I get back up on the table with my orange juice in hand.

"I may fall asleep fair warning and my music is super loud so pinch me or something if your worried." I say and he nods at me hitting the paddle on the floor making the machine buzz. He dips it in the ink and hits it again I pop my ear buds in and turn on some hard german rock because I don't like the sound of needle to skin. Jasper puts his gloved hand on my thigh and gives me a thumbs up and I give him one back and lay my head back and close my eyes.

Tap, tap yanking earbud out my eyes pop open to Rose standing over me. I must have fallen asleep.

"How in the hell are you sleeping through that? You are a freak of nature." Rose is almost shrieking at me. She wore a tunic and jeans so she has a tunic on that covers her butt.

"My leggings are in my bag doll put them on you will freeze out there," I tell her she is flushed and sweating.

"Grab the 7/11 bag I bought you peanut butter crackers you look a little pale." She does both and turns to show me the outline of her tattoo and I give her two thumbs up. I look down and Jasper is ungloved and his hair isn't in his hat anymore and it just goes over his shoulders.

"Sorry I had to go use the bathroom and take my hat off it got too hot in here." He says and grabs a pony tail holder off his desk throwing it up in a low ponytail in a few practiced pulls.

"Sounds good can I go use the facilities as well?" I asked wrapping my ear bud cord around my phone.

"Yep if you are still okay we can start shading." He says standing and reaching for my hand I am holding my dress up away from my thigh I know better that to jump up after getting tattooed it's a good way to puke or pass out.

"Down the hall to the left last door on the right." He says let me go once I am upright.

"Thanks," I say and walk down the hall my leg is going to be so sore tomorrow the muscle is already tight.

"Are you going to be pissed if I go home?" Rose says when I come out of the bathroom.

"No love I know your tired I will be there in a while I am going to get all the shading done if I can tonight. I will see you when I get home." I lean forward and kiss her cheeks because she looks beat and its because she is coming off of the adrenaline rush from the tattoo. She nods and walks back toward the front.

"Did your girlfriend go home?" Jasper says when I reenter his room.

"Huh," I ask because I am a little confused.

"Did your girlfriend that just got tattooed go home? I heard the front bell ring." Jasper says looking at me like I have lost my mind.

"She is going home this was her first tattoo and it has wiped her out. She is a friend and a girl but not of the dating type although she is hot she doesn't have the right parts for me." I tell him grabbing the candy out of the bag that I got from 7/11.

"Do you like Reese's?" I ask him and tilt the bag in his direction. He smiles up and me and reaches in the bag.

"These are the best." He says and takes one. I nod in agreement because he is right,

"I mixed these up for you from dark to light these are custom mixed these for you but wrote them down so when we touch up I know." I look over his shoulder at the colors and man they are vivid the good thing about being as pale as I am is that color shows up beautifully on my skin. I look down at Jaspers arm that he has across the tattoo chair and he has a beautiful black and grey hawk on his forearm. I reach out and touch it without a second thought.

"It was done in Seychelles Greece on my first deployment." He says as I run my finger across the skin.

"Sorry I wasn't trying to invade your personal space. It is just such a beautiful tattoo." I tell him and go to step back he reached out and took my hand.

"I don't mind its nice for someone to touch me for a change. And I have been touching you for hours now so no reason to be shy about repaying the favor." He winks at the end and I smile at him.

"If you are ready then let's get this going I am excited to see what this finished product looks like."

I hop up on the chair and fold dress up to where my panties are. Jasper sprays the ink and I flinch when he rubs it with a towel.

"That part always sucks I have hundreds of hours and that towel still sucks," Jasper says taking a second swipe.

"I have to admit that I would not have pegged you for an art major or a tattoo lover really. But I have to say you have been one of the easiest clients I have ever had I have been at this almost 10 years." Jasper says starting up his machine and getting the darkest shade on his tray.

"I plugged my phone in so now you will get to talk to me. I am not your normal art major I guess a lot of people when I was an undergrad had a different look on life than I do weird hair odd clothes but I majored in art because I love it. I also love tattooing and its what my dissertation is about, tattooing and the evolution of the art.

"I am going to need you to get that published and for everyone to get to reading that so that those of us with ink and our culture isn't so looked at sideways. Have you ever been to a tattoo convention?" Jasper asks moving on with the shading I watch with rapt attention because shading is so cool to watch for me.

"I haven't been yet I want to go one day," I tell him trying to pay attention but I am enjoying watching his progress.

"We are going to one in Chicago in the spring, you should go they are a lot of fun and for your research, you know," Jasper says smiling at me.

"Yeah I think that would be fun." I say back to him and we continue talking through my shading. It is the most comfortable I have ever been with other person right off the bat. The feeling is odd but pleasant.


	2. Cold Shoulder

I have never cried after getting a tattoo but standing in the mirror in Jasper's tattoo room I am crying big tears that are running down my cheeks. Rose and I have been friends since kindergarten and this tattoo symbolizes those decades of friendship. This tattoo is exactly what I was looking for a smooth tattoo that looks just like my drawing.

"I really hope those tears are because you're happy if not I am going to have to quit tattooing. Because I have to pat myself on the back but this tattoo is something I am very proud of." Jasper says from his rolling chair. I turn back toward him and see the huge smile on his face and damn it he has dimples and I mean beautiful deep spots on both cheeks. I hope he doesn't smile like that all the time because it sets off a hoard of butterflies in my belly.

"It is gorgeous Jasper. I am going to wear shorts in the snow just to show it off." I tell him with a laugh because everyone at the gym will be seeing this and soon.

"I was thinking maybe you would like to come with the shop to Chicago and let me tattoo you at the convention." Jasper tells me. I look back at him with shock.

"Send me the dates and I will see if I can get the time off. You can tattoo me anytime." I tell him and 100% I would let him tattoo me again right now if he wanted.

"Here is my card you can call me whenever maybe we can get a drink sometime." Jasper says as I take the card and smile. I have had a damned smile on my face most of the time I have been in this shop.

"That I can do and we can also have a drink sometime. I work weird hours but you let me know." I tell him putting the card in my wallet and dropping my phone back in my purse. I slide my sock covered feet into my boots. Jasper cleans my tattoo and puts cellophane on it. I go pay and walk home on a cloud tattooing is such a rush and I know when I get home I will crash hard.

"Why does my leg hurt so much worse than it did yesterday? How are you not in pain? I swear you are a witch Swan." Rose says from her place on our sofa with as much snark possible.

"No coffee for you then if I am such a witch," I tell her acting like I am going to put her cup back in the cupboard.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean it you know I cannot be held responsible for what comes out of my mouth before coffee. I love you Bells." Rose croons from the couch and I have to roll my eyes because this is just Rose she is like a damn sour patch kid.

"And for the record I am not a witch I just don't bitch about how sore my leg is today. I need to hit go to the store today but that requires pants so I may just ditch that responsibility. I do have to work tonight though." I tell her running the gauntlet of things I could wear that would cause the least irritation to the new tattoo. I may run to the gym either way.

 _B - Hey how fancy is the showing tonight?_

 _J - Not at all we have a couple of street artists and just local guys. So wear whatever you want I will be by at 7 to get you._

 _B - Sounds like a good night see you then x_

The day passes with nothing to serious I text Jasper and tell him about the show tonight. It's a half-assed invite really but its about all I got for game. I wear one of my more conferrable outfits that isn't appropriate for most of our openings but is for this one. Black backless body suit that when I bought it was purely black but since then I have painted on it a giant paisley pattern in greens. The open back shows off my poppy and its sexy but not skanky. I slip on the nude heels that Rose lent me and grab my slip wallet. Rose did my hair its pinned on one side and curled with in an inch of frizz. My makeup is simple nude lipstick and all. I have my tattoo wrapped up in a sleeve so that it doesn't rub or leak.

"James is here Bells," Rose calls and I unplug my phone and scan my room to make sure that I have got everything I need for the night.

"You look fucking hot." Rose says from her spot on the couch. I take a bow blow her a kiss and walk out the door she clicks the lock behind me. James has been picking me up on his way to the gallery for night openings for a while he is as bad as my dad when it comes to walking the New York streets after dark.

"Hey babygirl, how you doin?" James calls from the drivers seat of his car parked at the curb. I roll my eyes at him because I am the last "baby" he would like wrong parts. I take over exaggerated steps to his car and say loudly to everyone walking down 58th.

"$100 for the night baby." I crow leaning down in the window. He laughs and hits the locks.

"Get on in and I will rock your world," James says and I laugh getting in the car. Our banter has always been fun and light-hearted.

" I am telling Garrett he needs to bring his ass home because you're switching teams," I say as James hits the gas and squeals away from the curb.

The music is louder than normal a nice change the clientele is younger and more my flow. So I am walking through chatting with people about the art and a whole bunch of other stuff.

" I love the poppy on your back it is almost as beautiful as its owner." A voice says from behind me touching my naked back.

"Thank you," I say and I turn to look at the owner of the hand also by turning I made the hand move.

" I am Mike the artist of this specific piece James tells me you are Isabella." Mike pokes his hand out at me so to be nice I shake his hand. His arm is still around the back of me grazing my ass with his hand.

"I would like to say that it is nice to meet you too Mike. But you shouldn't touch things that don't belong to you." I say to him and smile at him as nicely as possible. I turn and walk to where James is. When I get to him he put his arm around my waist. He has run interference for me with men who were to handsy.

"James the next time Mike touches me I am going to break his fucking hand." I whisper into James' ear I know that we look like lovers which was my point maybe it would discourage Mike a little. James laughs like I have said something funny and runs his nose across my jar to my ear.

"Okay well do what you need to and if it he does it again I will throw him out on his ass." James whispers in my ear and I laugh because I know he will. I kiss his cheek and decide to go to the bar that we have set up and grab a drink.

"I can defiantly see you as a whiskey girl." Says a deep southern accent from my left. I smile because I obviously look hot this is the second proposition in as many minutes. I take my drink from the bartender and turn to the deep baritone.

"That is a surprise because up until now you have pegged me all wrong." I say to him and smile at him. He looks good a dark wash jean button up blue shirt his hair is down. I step towards him and wince a little.

"I can admit when I am wrong and let me tell you that I would have tattooed you all day today verses the clients I had today." Jasper says taking a swig from his whiskey but not taking his eyes from mine. His intense stare is intoxicating I smile a little wider.

"I can't say the same I am sore as hell from you." I say not realizing the innuendo until the words are hanging between us. He laughs out loud and choking on his drink and even turns a little red. I am blushing as well because damn it I walked into this uncomfortable moment.

"Incase you are wondering you would be sore after me." He leans closer to me and whispers against my ear making me shutter. I look at him and his slight grin on his face. I turn my head to look at him his eyes have dilated and my nipples harden at the thought of him. I break our connection.

"Maybe I will let you live up to that at some point. Would you like a tour?" I say to him raising an eyebrow at him. Jasper nods at me and we set off across the gallery.

"I would put my arm around your waist but your boyfriend my not like that. If you were mine I wouldn't like it." Jasper says as we stand in front of the first piece. He is looking at me without turning his head and his words make me smile. Because really what girl doesn't like a man with a little possessive streak.

"I don't have a boyfriend so that would be your choice. But be aware there is a man in here that has already been shunned for touching me tonight." I tell him following his lead and don't look away from him.

"Oh yes I saw that brush off and I also saw the blonde man kiss you. So I am very curious which I will get if I touch you." He laughs a little and I have to roll my eyes at him.

"May the odds forever be in your favor." I tell him and he laughs and as we walk to the next display he puts his hand on the small of my back. His rough palm against the skin of my back makes goosebumps break out across my skin. His hand is hot against my back but that could be the whiskey. I have to take a deep breath because his skin sends electricity through me. We walk through the gallery and Jasper never falters his hand never leaves my back and all of the other people who come to converse with us.

"Isabella this must be the reason for the cold shoulder. Who is your friend?" Mike scathes as we approach his display and I smirk knowing that Jasper is will dominate this conversation.

"Jasper Whitlock I didn't catch your name?" He says putting his hand out to Mike. Mike takes the outstretched hand grudgingly. I smile when he gives me a dirty look because Jasper is mincing compared to Mike and I wouldn't put it past him. I lean back away from Mike and Jasper must feel the change in my demeanor he rubs his hand along my skin softly.

"I am Micheal Newton I go by Mike. These 5 pieces here are mine." He sounds proud which he should be the pieces are interesting and nice. I have seen worse and I don't know much about him as these are the first pieces of his then he probably has some great work to come potentially. But he is overly confident which wont help to sell the piece they are over priced for a newer artist but I remember James mentioning him.

" I like this piece how much is it going for? I would love to have it." Jasper says pointing to an oil painting of what looks like a coy pond it is beautiful and has great texture which is hard to get. Mike looks disapprovingly at Jasper and smirks.

"It is on consignment here for 1,000 but maybe if you wait a few days the price will go down." He smirks at Jasper. Jasper actually laughs out loud and nods at him.

"To rich for my blood then man I hope someone buys it," Jasper says to Mike and Mike scoffs and turns from us walking to other people.

"Sorry that he was such an ass," I say moving on to the next artist her stuff is fantastic Rose bought me a watercolor painting of hers for Christmas it was of the New York skyline.

"He is jealous because here you are walking through the gallery with me after blowing him off so blatantly," Jasper says as we reach the next artist.

"Tanya meet my friend Jasper, he is a lover of the arts. Mike just blew it I know you won't make the same mistake." I tell her and when she looks up her eyes light up a little. Jasper is hot and I know that she likes a good tattooed man.

"Oh, I would never turn away a sale and definitely not for a sexy man like him." She smiles at him and takes his outstretched hand.

"Why thank you ma'am you are very talented do you take commissions?" Jasper asks and doesn't move his hand from my back even with the beautiful Tanya Denali in front of him he still holds me. How could I be feeling this way for a man I had just met?

"I would like this one if it is not sold yet." Jasper indicates a painting that looks like it is underwater with ice invading it. Its dark but beautiful I love Tanya's work and I think its great for both of them. He takes the slip for the painting and she gives him a card. We continue on and James finds us sometime later.

"Isabella we are all sold other than tonight," James says to me as Jasper and I are standing and talking to a group.

"Okay, James this is Jasper my friend and Jasper this is James, my boss," I say introducing the two.

"Nice to meet you man and I would like to say I am her date. This is a nice set Y'all have here." Jasper says and at his declaration James looks up at me and raises his eyebrow at me. I smile back at him.

"I need to step away I will be back don't leave." I tell him. He leans over and kisses my cheek and nods at me. I blush and walk away with James. We walk to the front and he grabs the microphone.

"Ladies and Gents I would like to thank you all for coming tonight. This is something that is new here and I would love to continue it. If tonight is just an inkling of what is to come then we will all be grand by fall." He says and everyone laughs. James is a showman he loves the attention but he knows his shit when it comes to art.

"I personally like to invite an artist to join us next month. She can't say no to me because I am her boss so Swan would you display your art next month for all of us to enjoy." James says and everyone looks at me and a set of steel blue eyes catches mine and he crooks his eye brow at me.

"Way to put me on the spot but yes I will bring in a display next month thank you for the chance, James," I say croaking at the end because I am a little choked up.

"She said yes." He yells as if I had just agreed to marry him.

"Okay if you have made purchases tonight please close out that purchase before you leave. Thank you all for coming we appreciate your time and most importantly your money." James says and turns the microphone off and puts it behind the counter. I follow him to get behind the counter as people start lining up to pay for purchases I write them in the ledger along with delivery instructions if there are any. Jasper is last to get to me and smiles as he hands me his ticket. I ring him up and take his card and after I run it I write everything in the ledger.

"Do you need delivery or are you taking it home with you?" I ask him looking up from the ledger. He seems to think on it for a minute.

"Is it personally delivered or a delivery guy?" He says smiling at me. I shake my finger at him.

"This is my place of work but if you would like to take it home tonight I may be able to escort the art work if you like," I tell him as James walks back from locking the gallery door.

"Thank you for coming to Jasper. Isabella I will see you Tuesday right." James says kissing my cheek and I nod at him patting his hand.

"You okay with leaving with him or do I need to step in?" James asks against my ear after his kiss. I smile because I don't have any siblings he is the closest thing I have ever had to a brother. We leave Jasper in the front so we can lock the ledger and cash drawer up.

"I am good but thank you and yes I will see you Tuesday I am opening at 10." I tell him and grab my slim and phone out of the safe and my coat off the rack. Jasper takes the painting from James that he has just wrapped up. James nods at me and smiles a knowing smile.

"Are you a native New Yorker?" Jasper asks me as we climb into an SUV that is parked around the block from the gallery. Jasper opens my door and helps me up because my leg still hurts.

"I am a Seattle native but I have lived in New York for a little over a decade. I know you are not a native New Yorker with that southern draw you have. So where are you from originally?" I tell him as he turns the SUV on.

" I grew up on a ranch in Texas and I have lived in New York just about 5 years. Would you like me to take you home or are you going to hang with me for a while? No hanky pinky though I do pride myself on being a gentleman." He asks looking over at me with a grin on his face. I blush because I don't put out that easy either even though he is sex on a stick.

" Oh, a real cowboy and if you would like to take me home then do so if not then we can spend some time together but I wouldn't want to make assumptions either. I don't put out that easy you have to work for it. " I wink at him and he chuckles at me.

"Do your parents support an art degree?" Jasper asks and it seems sudden but I answer anyway because I like the questioning.

"Yeah I guess. My grandma left me an inheritance when she passed my dad had it invested so between my scholarships and inheritance most of my degree was paid for so they didn't have much say. My dad is a cop and mom is a teacher so a more reliable career would have been preferable for them. But I am not one to conform so they just let me follow my dreams. What about you? I know that you grew up on a ranch but why tattooing?" I tell him and I am not sure why I have given him my life story but I have. I look at him and he is smiling.

"Lets start with the simplest answer to that question. I joined the military out of high school. My father was a career military member so he expected me to go into the military. Texas has no shortage of patriotism and with the education opportunity it was a good deal. I deployed multiple times and I loved my job." I can see the excitement in his eyes.

"Why did you get out?" I say out of pure curiosity.

"I got shot during a mission and it took me months to recover physically and years to recover mentally." He tells me and now he is long at the road and holding the steering wheel hard.

"Sorry I wasn't trying to bring up old you for your service Jasper." I tell him because it seems like I have brought a grey cloud on us. He stops at the light and looks over at me.

"Nah no reason to be sorry shit happens and art is what helped me heal. Tattooing gave me pain therapy that I need it was a good outlet for me. Then I became interested in the tattooing itself. I apprenticed for a few years here in New York. Emmett is the reason I came to New York in the first place." Jasper tells me pulling up in front of a townhouse.

"This is me lets go find a place for that beautiful piece you sold me." He says hopping from the SUV and opening my door after I slide my heels back on. He holds his hand out and I take it sliding out of the seat. He grabs the painting and we head to the door. Jaspers home is beautiful nice warm colors leather furniture in the living room and fluffy looking rugs over sleek hardwood floors.

"Do you mind if I take my heels off?" I ask him my feet are killing me.

"Not at all I will order some pizza or Chinese if you want some I am starving I left the shop and came right to the gallery," Jasper says patting his nonexistent stomach. I slide my shoes under the entry table.

"Yes, please I could eat a whole cow right now. I only nibbled today I went to the gym before work but didn't eat anything substantial and if I haven't told you yet thank you for coming tonight I know it was impromptu but I am glad you came." I tell him and my stomach makes itself known as if on cue.

"Thank you for the invite I like small galleries like James' they show the real art pulse of the city. Any preference on food?" Jasper asks quirking an eyebrow at me. He is standing in his large kitchen his hip propped against the granite counter.

"I eat anything except snails I just cant get down that way," I tell him wrinkling my nose.

"Pizza it is I have a beer in the fridge if you would like one." He says pointing to the fridge.

"I would love a beer," I tell him and he shakes his head at me turning to the fridge.

"My god a woman who eats, drinks and sleeps through tattoos where have you been my whole life," Jasper says grabbing my hand and walking through the doorway toward the kitchen.


	3. Nice and Easy

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

Jasper and I have pizza and beer on the couch and watch lip sync battle on his DVR. We talk about small things and big things it is the best non date "date" I have ever been on. We end up snuggling on the couch. And I wake up around 4 am and I am so conferrable that I didn't even know I went to sleep. Jasper and I are tangled up on the couch and I don't think that this has ever happened to me before.

"Hey I am going to go home." I tell him lightly rubbing his leg. My dad has been a cop my whole life and I know not to shake him awake and I assume that Jasper would be the same.

"Huh" His voice is gravelly and goosebumps break out across my skin.

"It's 4 am we must have fallen asleep. I need to get home." I tell him his eyes pop open bright blue in the dark room.

"I can't believe that I fell asleep if you want to go home I will take you." Jasper says and I nod at him. Wincing a little as I stretch my leg out remembering why I groan.

"My leg is sore I should have taken the wrap off it's going to suck when I get home." I tell Jasper as I go to stand and my leg throbs again. Stupid, stupid, stupid Bella I know better than to leave a wrap on it like this.

"Let me look at." Jasper says his voice is still gruff he pats my leg and I turn toward him. I pull the leg of my jumpsuit up above the sleeve that I have over the tattoo Jasper shakes his head at me. Because we can both see that it has seeped though the sleeve.

"It looks like you get to stay here for a while because the only way to get this off without damaging the tattoo is to wet it. Come on woman lets go to the kitchen." He grabs my hand and pulls me toward the kitchen.

"Okay, so let's get that pant leg back up." He says pushing up my pant leg turning to grab dish towels setting them on one side of the sink and coming back toward me.

"Come on get up here and I will get this sleeve off. No more sleeves either not on my work at least." He tells me in a turn voice and like the smart ass that I am I salute him and he shakes head at me and pats the counter. He grabs my hips and sits me on the counter I squeal when he does because who does that. He looks up at me from his place between my legs and my heartbeat speeds up and I hold my breath his face is beautiful. I am usually not one for a full beard and long hair but on him it looks delicious.

"Swing toward the sink and throw your other leg across the counter that way if you can." He says pointing over the faucet. So I do as instructed he turns the faucet on away from my leg checking the temperature. When it is to his liking he turns the water down and grabs the sprayer running the warm water over the sleeve and it feels good but I know removing the sleeve will not feel great.

"I am going to run up and get you the stuff I use for my tattoos. Be right back." He says and takes off. My dad would shit himself if he knew I was in the home alone with a man I barely knew. I shake my head at the thought I need to go home and visit but it's a pain in the ass for the most part.

"Okay, so you can have this one I have more use it at least the next 5 days." He tells me and the boss man is back in business I smirk at him and stick my tongue out at him and he laughs a little.

"Hey no sass lady I don't need my beautiful tattoo messed up." He says grabbing my chin and in a split second he shocks me with locking his lips to mine. It's a soft kiss no rushing no insistence a simple press of his lips to mine. He pulls back with a smile and I grab his face and kiss him the same way. When I pull back and let him go he closes his eyes and lets out a breathy holds the top of the sleeve and slowly starts pulling it down. I bite my lip because it stings he continues to pull it down and I close my eyes and suck it up.

"Let me rinse it and pat it dry." He says looking at me and I nod so that he will continue. His hands caressing my tender skin washing away the dries ink and blood. Getting the dry towel he pats it dry.

.

"Thank you for cleaning me up and it's my art just incase we weren't clear." I say with sass and a smile because its my original but his work. Most artists are very argent myself included.

"Baby that art on paper was yours but this is my art." He says rubbing the light ointment over said art piece. His eyes are bright and his lips are pulled into a grin.

"Touché I will give you your piece in this because you made my art even more beautiful." I tell him looking him right in the eye. He leans forward and presses his lips lightly to mine and I take in the feeling of the soft and sweet.

"I have wanted to do that since you walking into the shop. I don't think I have ever been so nervous to tattoo someone in my life. But you were a fucking champ." He holds his hands against my cheeks and the sly grin on his face is contagious making me return it in kind.

"I hate to beg off but my leg hurts a lot and I have to get up at a decent time tomorrow." I tell Jasper not really wanting to leave but needing too. I have shit to do tomorrow even though I would like nothing more than to spend as much time with him as I can. His spirit is infectious.

"I kiss you and now you want to run off you wound me." He says to me smiling and his hand covering his chest and leans down to peck me again.

"I would like to say that the kiss has nothing to do with it but that kind sir would be a hell of a lie. It has everything to do with the kiss and how I feel when you kiss me. So in order to not look like a whore I should go home." I tell him looking up at him and smiling.

"Okay, I will take you home but don't call yourself a whore and let's add a condition," Jasper says standing and helping me off the counter and I have to laugh a little at his spunk.

"All right then name your terms on this ride home." I ask and flutter my eyelashes at him making him scratch at his chin and grin at me. He if fun to be with I like a sense of humor and he has a good one.

"Come out with me tomorrow night I have a late appointment but we could have a late dinner just the two of us no friends, bosses or anyone else." Jasper says cleaning up the counter. I huff making him look up and I give him side-eye as Rose calls it. He stills instantly and crosses his arms over his wide chest and stares at me. I smile at him and nod.

"Deal except I don't want to go out. I will make dinner and you come to my place bring beer and maybe a movie." I say and he says nothing just stares at me.

"You got yourself a bargain there beautiful lets get you home so that I can see you again tomorrow today actually ." He says grabbing my hand and pulling me against him. I look up at him and smile because damn he is sexy and he wants to do this again.

"Anything you prefer to eat, allergies or dislikes." I ask Jasper on the drive to my apartment. We are comfortable in the car together he has a calming effect on me.

"I eat anything and whatever you make will be good however being a Texas boy I do prefer meat and potatoes." Jasper says holding onto my hand. He looks so relaxed in the drivers seat. I smile at him.

"That I can do I am a meat and potatoes kinda girl myself my dad would be ashamed of me otherwise," I tell him and when we get to my place he kisses me again outside the car and watches me walk in the door.

"You're seeing him again tonight? I am a little green with envy lady just green." Rose says laughingly in the phone I roll my eyes at her because if anyone on the planet should be jealousies it should be me because my best friend is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen as though she stepped out of a magazine.

"He asked to see me again tonight and I agreed he came to my opening last night because I asked him why wouldn't I want to have dinner with him. Have you seen him? Hello." I say laughing and grabbing the onion buns off the shelf and put them in my cart. I decided to get the stuff to make burgers, homemade fries and coleslaw.

"He is hot as hell how is the leg after he doctored it last night?" Rose says and I have to laugh a little because I am in running shorts in winter because I don't want to cover the healing tattoo after my oversight yesterday. I finish shopping quickly and head home.

 _On my way should be there in 10 or so beer good? - J_

 _Yeah, beer is good to see you soon. - B_

I haven't been on a real date since sophomore year undergrad I got to busy to bother really when my vibrator did a better job. I am dropping the fries in oil when the buzzer rings I run to the door and press the button and run back to the pan.

"Marco." I hear Jasper yell from the entrance.

"Polo," I yell back taking the first set of fries out.

"I brought a pale ale its good with burgers. Do you need any help?" Jasper says as he walks in the kitchen I am standing in the kitchen in cotton shorts and a tank top. Living on a higher floor in the winter has its benefits one is not having to dress like an Eskimo all winter.

"I think I am good right now I am going to let the potatoes rest and put the burgers on but you can fry them again if you like in about 10 minutes," I say looking at him and damn it if he doesn't look hot.

"Sorry I am a shit hostess there is a rack next to the door," I tell Jasper since he still has his jacket and hat on he chuckles and walks back towards the door. I grab the burgers off the counter and heat up the grill pan.

"You are not a shit hostess you are cooking me dinner. Also please tell me that this is not what you wore to the store because that would have caused serious traffic build up." Jasper says as walking back into the kitchen and saddling up next to me.

"Nope I wore running shorts though because the overbearing man who put this beautiful tattoo on my leg told me under no circumstances was I supposed to cover his work." I tell him and I look at him standing next to me and wink at him making him chuckle. We cook in relative silence aside from the music in the room.

"I don't think that I have ever had a woman other than my mother cook for me so thank you for tonight." Jasper says to me as we sit down at the table. Dinner is delicious and fatty the beer is amazing he made a good pick.

"What movie did you bring? Because warning if you didn't bring it is my choice." I tell him as I plop down on the couch next to him.

"Fuck no I forgot. Please don't make me watch a stupid movie though." Jasper says as he wraps his arm around my shoulders I lean into him.

"Pulp fiction it is if you are not a Tarantino fan then I had a good time tonight but we are going to have to keep this strictly tattooing no time outside of the studio," I tell him straight-faced because I am only joking a little.

"Where have you been all my life? I mean you eat, drink, love a good gore filled movie and fall asleep getting tattooed I mean come on. How in the hell did I miss a woman like you my whole life." Jasper says and I know he is trying to be light with his words but they hit me hard.

"I don't know here and there I guess but we are here now aren't we." I say smiling at him. We lounge around on the couch Jasper kicks off his boots at some point and we have a pseudo movie marathon. I wake with the feel of vibration against my thigh.

"Stop moving I am comfortable damn it." I mumble before I even open my eyes Jasper is moving I am assuming that he is in search of the vibrating but I was very asleep. This is a weird pattern that we are falling into watching tv and sleeping together.

"I can't find my fucking phone and it keeps ringing. I was comfortable too lady." Jasper grumbles at me. I open my eyes and move to help him look for the damned thing we find it between the cushions of course. I look at my watch and it is 515 am we slept a few hours and now I am wide awake.

"If you need to get that I won't be offended I should get up and make coffee." I tell him walking towards the kitchen. Making busy work setting everything out for coffee. Jasper answers his phone.

"Hey man yeah sorry I passed out at Bella's and didn't set an alarm." Jasper says into the phone as he walks into the kitchen and sets his hip against the counter. He is running his hand across his forehead his brow is frowned. His face is pulled with tension and I don't understand his ire.

"I can be home in an hour if you want to wait if not then I can catch you tomorrow. My first appointment today is at 1230." Jasper says looking at his watch.

"Yeah brother thanks for checking in I will see you at the shop." Jasper says pulling phone away from his ear and sticks it in his pocket.

"I didn't mean to keep you from the morning plans you had. Don't let me intrude I am going to drink coffee check emails and go for a run." I tell him pulling the cabinet open for my favorite book boyfriend inspired mug. I raise an eyebrow in question and he nods.

"I don't do anything I don't want to do Isabella if I didn't want to be here I wouldn't. That was just Emmett you met him at the shop a few times a week we meet up so he can destroy me in the gym. I forgot really not that I would rather be with him because that is not the case." He says to me reaching up to move hair from my face and the action feels oddly intimate. I blush sightly and hand him his coffee.

"Thank you and if you aren't to put out I could use a run this morning as well my bag is in the car," Jasper says taking the cup from my hand and taking a sip groaning into the cup.

"I wouldn't mind company and I am glad that you want to be here. I like you here and don't use my name like a curse you sound like my father." I tell him with a grin.

"I don't want to be in that category at all. I will go grab my bag now." Jasper says to me and sets his cup down on the counter and walks out with a peck on my lips. I open my computer at the breakfast bar and let it start up so that I can check my email.

"Holy shit woman when are we going to stop?" Jasper gasps at me when we slow down in when we get close to Washington Square Park.

"Are you dropping out soldier? Don't tell me you are tired already." I tell him panting myself we ran about three miles so far at a pretty quick pace. I run daily it is my zen but if you don't run regularly then it can be hard.

"Sailor thank you and yes I am because I don't fucking run on a regular basis. This is the first thing I have found that I don't like about you." He says winking.

"See I am not perfect sorry to shatter that picture for you but we are going to have to walk home because my fucking side is killing me. It has been hurting every time I run for the last couple months but it's a little worse today." I roll my eyes and clutch at my side.

"Sounds good I guess I need to start running regularly to keep up with you. Maybe you should come lift me with me some time." Jasper says taking my hand and walking back toward my place.

"Yeah maybe I am kind of a wimp I only started running for the stress relief not for the exercise. I hit the gym a few times a week because I like to eat whatever I want not because I like it." I tell him pulling my hair back up into a high ponytail. I look over at Jasper and he is doing the same.

"I need to go home and shower and get over to the shop before my first client. Come by later and maybe get some research done for the convention." He says as we reach my apartment I don't say yes or no I do nod in understanding. I am suddenly exhausted which has become to normal after to much exertion.

"I can't make any promises but I will call you later." I say and he nods. I get a quick kiss on the lips and he jumps in his SUV I walk into the building. My shower is quick and I wrap my hair and get in bed naked suddenly not able to keep my eyes open.

I wake up and it is dark out I am momentarily confused by the darkness because I laid down at like 10 am. I look at my bedside clock and its 545 pm I have slept almost 8 hours in the day. I sit up and grab my robe heading to the living room and grabbing my phone off the bar.

 _Sorry I didn't come by I went to sleep I didn't mean to but I just woke up. - B_

 _No worries beautiful I was just getting worried but thought maybe you had blown me off for good since my running skills are shit. Glad you got some rest. - J_

 _Nope, I like that I am better at something than you it is an equalizer. - B_

 _Good because I would have thrown rocks at your window. - J_

His texts make me smile and I can defiantly see this going somewhere. I don't do things half-assed in my life so if I want something I go for it.


	4. Coming Apart

AN: Thank you as always for the reviews they make my day. Happy Valentine's Day American readers I hope your day is lovely. I hope that y'all enjoy this chapter as always SM owns twilight, not me I just play in her world. Please leave reviews good or bad I appreciate them all.

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

The month between our first date's and the opening that I am showing at flew by. Jasper and I spend and an incredible amount of time together. We talk every day and see each other a few times a week as well. I absolutely could not be any more nervous than I am right now. I have never been on this side of a gallery opening. I have the pieces set up the way I like I have on a sexy body con dress that has a slit on the side and you can see my tattoo and I love it. Jasper and I have a design for the tattoo convention and I am anxious for that because I will be on display and if tonight is any indication I am not good on the spot.

"Your paintings are a beautiful baby." Jasper wraps his arms around me and kisses me right behind my ear making me smile. He is dressed in slacks and a grey button-down shirt that is rolled up his arms showing off his ink.

"You two make me sick. I need Garrett to come home soon because your lovey dove shit is old." James says as he comes from the back room I roll my eyes he is such a pain in the ass when his boyfriend is out of town.

"Thank you for coming I know that the shop is busy right now," I tell him holding his hands against me. The night goes by with a lot of talking of what my pieces mean how I came to each design and ideas. I have a few different types of art from just oil or mixture/multimedia pieces. All of my pieces sell and Tanya actually buys two of them a matching set of Dia de Los Muertos oil paintings. The man has his hand reached out and the woman is running toward him. The faces are pure oil and the clothes are items everything from keys buttons etc. She said she had to have them Jasper bought a full pirate ship that I drew with charcoal I have had it for about 5 years but Rose made me bring it.

"I see that instead of helping others sell their art you are here peddling your own." I turn to see that Mike Newton is standing to my left with a condescending look on his face. I smile at him and Jasper does too.

"Yeah, you packed up early last month and didn't hear that James asked me to show my pieces. But I didn't need to peddle my art it sells itself." I tell him a little snarky because he pisses me off and I just don't like him. Working in a gallery like this allows me the ability to not have to play nice with artists I don't like. Mike is here as a customer, not a displaying artist tonight and I am far from starving so I don't need his business.

"Hey, baby sorry I have to run back to the shop can you come by when you're done," Jasper says after he answers his phone and we kiss before he leaves. I turn to find James to ask him if he will take me to the shop when we close. I find him behind the desk and bump him out of my way and take over the recipes and logistics which he tries to fight me over because I'm not on the clock tonight. But I love this place this gallery is an amazing showcase of art and art is my life. I have my dissertation in just two months and the tattoo convention next week. Life is ticking along correctly. We close out the night about $5000 dollars in profits I go in the back and change into sweats, a t-shirt and my chucks the snow has started melting on the streets New York is a beautiful city covered in snow but not the grey slush that happens after. We take the melting snow as a sure sign that spring is coming.

"Okay babe have a good weekend I will see you Monday and Tuesday right then your off for a week," James asks as he pulls up in front of the shop and me nodal him.

"Yep and I appreciate the time off but know this trip is as much school work as it is for pleasure. Thank you for bringing me to the shop and be good at the gallery without me." I say to him winking him and he winks back to lean over kiss his cheek and step out onto the sidewalk. When I get to the door of the shop and all I can hear is yelling.

"Why the fuck are you still here you came and asked your damned questions and I gave you the only answer you will be getting." I heard Jasper say his voice filled with so much anger it sends chills across my skin. I turn to see that James has already pulled away so I reach for the door and pull it the rest of the way open.

"Hey, Jasper I'm here," I say loud as I enter through the door.

Jasper comes around the corner and his face is red and his eyes are wide. I lift an eyebrow at him curious about what I have walked in on. He reaches me and wraps his arms around and pushes his face into my hair kissing my head. I smile into him we have only been seeing each other a little over a month but we are always together at each other's places so his comforting arms feel like home. He moves my hair from neck and kisses my cheek.

"I hope that you don't judge me too harshly tonight and I am sorry for this baby. I will make it up to you I promise." Jasper says his voice sounds resolute. I slide my hands to his face and kissing him deeply in the answer. I rest my forehead against him and we just look at each other I nod at him.

"I can see now why you have been such a bastard about this today you have yourself a little toy here in New York and there for the life that you left behind is nothing."A man says walking around the corner and he is striking. Copper hair, over 6 feet tall, lanky but strong limbs, he looks disheveled and unkempt, his green eyes are clouded, and his face sunken in. He's an addict I have seen enough of them here New York to recognize the signs.

"You don't get to talk about her she has nothing to do with any of this and you know that. I haven't dealt with your bullshit in a lot of years brother and that will not change until you own your shit. But leave my girl out of it we have been down a similar road brother and I let that one go this woman would make an only child." Jasper says and he is holding on to me protectively his arm is wrapped around my middle and he has a death grip on my hip. He looks cool and calm but he is anything but there is a war waging in his head. I reach down and put my hand on his trying to offer him just a bit of support.

"I think we should go home handsome it has been a long day." I lay my head on Jaspers shoulder and look up at him. I am trying to give him and out I can see how uncomfortable he is right now.

"I agree baby lets go home. Edward get your shit together bro I can't and won't do it for you. Don't come here again trying to guilt me into anything. I got help and you have to do the same but you have to want y get out." Jasper tells Edward and his words stir curiosity inside me but I keep silent because it is not my business. I know that Jasper has demons and when he is ready he will tell me.

"Just don't forget it, little brother, you are far from perfect. Don't get the delusion that this little piece here with her fancy job and art degrees will get stick with some loser tattoo artist for long." Edward says turning and walking out the door without a backward glance.

"Let's head to my place it is closer and after having t0 deal with that bastard I need you all to myself," Jasper says to me before turning me to him and kissing me like he is dying of thirst and I am ice cold water he digs his hands into my hair and pulls my head back making me moan loudly. He bites my chin and nibbles down the front of my neck causing my nipples to harden and my thighs to clinch as I try to combat the shock that just pulsed through me.

"God I want to bury myself inside you so bad right now." He moans against my skin. I moan back at him because words are failing me right now. I grab his hand and drag him to the lounge that is in the back of the shop. I push him toward the leather recliner in the lounge and start to hike my dress up and he growls pushing his pants to the floor and grabbing my hips and pulling me down into the chair with him. He yanks the top of my dress down exposing my tits he latches his lips around one biting down and pulling back making me grind against him.

I pull his head to my lip and kiss him. I slide my tongue across his bottom lip and he opens devouring my mouth I bite his lip making him moan. He reaches between us finding me completely bare I throw my head back moaning when he slides his finger into me.

"You are bare and your cunt is dripping baby this is going to be fast I have to be inside you right fucking now." He says and pulls his cock out and I don't even wait for him to move his hand off himself I am so hot for him. I slide myself down him he is deliciously hard and he stretches me he grabs my thighs digging his fingers into the meat there groaning as he bottoms out inside of me my head is thrown back, my back is arched with my hands resting on his shoulders.

"Move Isabella fuck yourself on me. You look so beautiful with your dress rumpled around you and my cock buried inside of that tight body." Jasper growls my neck pulling me toward him. His grip on my neck is tight but his dominance in sex turns me into a fucking mess. I lift up and drop back down on him screaming out at the pain and pleasure of riding him.

"Jasper I want to cum already I feel so full with you inside me," I say and he digs his hands into my hair pulling it and I wrap my arms around his neck and start bouncing making us both moan out loudly.

"I am going to cum baby if you don't want me to come inside of you then you have to get up now," I say pushing my hips instead I kiss him hard and swivel my hips his hand goes between us and he rubs my clit hard.

"Cum inside me Jasper please," I say in a whisper because it is all I can manage as I explode and what feels like lava floods my veins I feel Jasper tense below me and I slump against him that was intense. I tuck my face in his neck and he wraps his arms around my back rubbing up and down.

"I don't think I can move," I say against his neck and I hear him grunt against my hair. I close my eyes and let the contentment settle into my bones. I have never been in love I have actually avoided it like the plague and I am not sure that this is love but damn it feels good to be in his arms.

"Come on baby lets go home." I heard Jasper say in my ear his beard rubs against my cheek and I moan. I must have been dozing but I grunt and start to stand. We both groan in disappointment as his semi-hard cock come out of me. I stand on still shaky legs and Jasper reaches forward pulling the bottom of my dress down and kisses his ink on my leg and I moan because its sexy and his cum is running down my leg.

"That's fucking hot baby seeing my ink on your body and knowing that my cum is running down your leg we have to get the hell out of here before I bend you over the couch." He says standing and tucking himself into his pants.

"Let's go home and I will make you dinner and we can shack up for the night." He kisses my palm and leads me to the front of the shop grabbing my jacket from the rack and helps me into it. Walking into his house is now such a normal occurrence that its weird for a second I stand in the doorway.

"Go relax I will make dinner I set out before I left this morning." He says kissing me.

"I am going to go shower and I will come back down and help you," I say and kiss him again.

Jaspers bathroom was designed by a man it has no bathtub which is okay for me as I am not a big fan but it has a shower big enough for four people. I love the shower and I stand under the hot water washing my hair and the makeup off my face. I steal one of Jaspers shirts and boxers that I have to roll up I make my way downstairs.

"Mom he needs help he looks like hell." I hear Jasper voice and it is tight I shake my head because my man cannot catch a break today. I round the corner into the kitchen and Jasper is standing with the phone to his ear and his other hand locked in his hair tugging at it. He is leaned against the counter. I walk to him in hopes of offering some comfort.

"Mom I know that he is my brother and I love him but I will not give him money, he cannot work at the shop or live in my home. None of that will help him he will steal my shit and bring drugs into my life I don't need that shit." Jasper says into the phone. I stop in front of him and drop to my knees pulling him out of his jeans. He snaps his eyes open and looks me with fire in his eyes he starts to skate his head when I grab his cock and give it a kiss he bites his lip to snuff out the moan. I tug on his cock a few times which isn't necessary because he is already rock hard.

"Yes, mom my girlfriend did meet him and as always he was a complete prick and called her names." He says gasping at the end because I take him into my mouth with no warning. He tastes like me still which makes me wet to taste his cum mixed mine. I moan forgetting that he is on the phone with his mom. He wraps my hair in his fist and pulls me down on his cock and I grab his thighs because this is so fucking sexy I may combust just from giving him head.

"She is here right now. It is pretty serious were not just fucking around. Maybe I will bring her home next time I come down but I don't know if I am ready to share her yet." He says and I push my mouth all the way down on him and his grip on my hair tightens and his cock is in my throat and I am holding him there so long that my eyes are watering. He gets harder and erupts down my throat I look up to see his face he is biting his lip and his face is red. He looks fucking sexy and knowing that I make him come apart is sexy. I lick him clean and tuck him back into his pants when I look up his eyes are open and dilated.

"I have to go mom, yeah you too." He finishes and slams the phone down on the counter.

"Fuck a woman what in the hell am I supposed to do now never talk to my mother again," Jasper says pulling me to him and kissing the hell out of me.

"I know today has been rough on you I just wanted to do something just for you," I tell him and he moans.

"You don't have to do that baby just having you here makes it better," Jasper says running his finger on my bottom lip. It is an intimate gesture and I love the small touches that he gives me.

"I know I don't have to I wanted to it was my pleasure. I don't do anything I don't want to do same as you." I tell him opening my mouth and biting his finger and smiling.

"You are going to be the death of me woman." He says kissing me lightly on my lip and wrapping his hands in my hair.

"Now go on and let me make you dinner. You standing here in my clothes with your lips swollen from sucking my cock isn't going to get dinner cooked and I know I am starving." He says shooing me and when I walk off he slaps my ass. I squeal and walk into the living room picking up my computer and getting to my dissertation I submitted my newest version yesterday and I imagine I have it back from my advisor.

The weekend flies by I hang out at the shop on Sunday with Alice and work sporadically on my work I get a new tiny tattoo behind my ear of a fern leaf to represent home. Being in the shop with Jasper so close makes it hard to get any work done is impossible. When he is in between clients I poke my head in his room and he looks up and nods for me to come in.

"Hey, beautiful I am done here for the day if ya want to go." He says patting his lap I walk towards him dropping my sketchbook onto his table.

"Actually I drew this and I wanted to know if you would ink it today maybe now," I say to him running my hand along the drawing from my position behind him.

"This is cool where do you want it?" He asks right back into artist mode and I know that he is all business. I have been turned on all day so I reach out to grab his hand and run it up to my neck his breath hitches and I stop when his hair is in my hair and I point to the back of my ear.

"Oh baby you are playing with fire and I have no problem with fucking you with a studio full of people so watch it." He says wrapping his hand in my hair leaning down and biting my lip making me moan.

"Maybe that is exactly what I won't ever think about that," I tell him just above a whisper grabbing his cock through his pants. This should be fun.


	5. Public Displays

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

"Yes, Jasper more I need more." I don't know what is with me today but I am so horny. Jasper grabs my chin and turns my face to him and kisses me while ramming into me from behind.

"Your body was made for me. You love taking everything I have to give." He says in a low voice and he slams into me over and over until I come apart at the seams and his cock jerks inside of me. We are kissing deeply until my back starts to hurt. We stand in the bathroom disheveled. Jasper pulls away from and groans as his cock come out of me. I am left trying to hold myself up alone. He comes back with a washcloth and runs the water and starts to clean me up from behind.

"I can do that you know." I tell him and he shakes his head at me and finishes cleaning me up. He is by far the most considerate person I have ever met.

"Let me take care of you too. This isn't a one sided relationship I want to give you what you need as well." He tells me and I slump against the counter.

"I made dinner the timer will be going off soon lets get back downstairs so I can feed you." A simple kiss to my lips and he pulls me from the counter and we walk hand and hand downstairs and my phone trills from the entry table. I walk over and swipe to answer it.

"Hey Bells I have a favor." Rose's voice comes through the phone and it is quiet. Rose and I have been seeing each other spastically she is seeing Emmett regularly and I am with Jasper a lot.

"Yeah Rose what is going on." I ask her walking into the kitchen where Jasper is taking food out of the oven. He likes to cook so more often then not it is him making me dinner.

" I need you to come get me. I don't know how I got here and something has happened I need help." She says crying at the end. My anxiety spikes because my best friend is the strongest person I know.

"I will there where are you?" I say trying to hold in the worry that I am feeling Jasper is looking at me from the other side of the island his brows are furrowed.

"3rd and Dean Bella. Thank you." Rose says she is bawling now and hiccuping she sounds scared and I hate whatever and whoever has done this to my friends.

"I will be there as soon as I can get there. I love you." I tell her Jasper is in front of me with his hand on my chin because I am crying. He pulls me into him and lets me cry on him while she answers me.

"I love you too and tell Jasper I am sorry." She says and I can hear her sniffles. She hangs up and I look up at Jasper. He is looking down at me and I love him in that moment the tenderness on his face and in his movements makes my heart swell.

"We have to go pick up Rose right now something is wrong she is crying and she never cries" He nods at my statement and leans down and seals his lips to mine. I moan at the feeling of his lips and the comfort that his body is bringing me.

"Go upstairs and grab some sweats baby and we will go get her." Jasper says pulling back from me. He grabs his keys and wallet there goes our quiet night but this is what you do for your friends. The drive isn't to far maybe 15 minutes and when we get to the intersection and Rose is sitting on the curb. I jump from the SUV as soon as Jasper has stopped. Rose's face is bloody and streaked with mascara her lip is swollen.

"Rose I am here come on." I tell her she is just looking at the road with a detached stare on her face. I shake her arm and she slaps me and then recognition hits her at the same time. Damn that girl has an arm heat instantly blooms in my cheek.

"Oh Bella I am so sorry I didn't know it was you." She says starting cry. I pull her up by her hands and take her in my arms we stand and turn towards the SUV. Jasper opens the back door for me I pull her into the backseat with me.

"Presbyterian ?" Jasper asks when he gets behind the wheel. I nod as Rose tucks herself under my arm she is crying into my shirt.I am holding her as much as I can. When I look up I see Jasper looking at me in the rearview and I look away when I catch his eye. I think I know what happened to Rose and it is breaking my heart.

The next few hours hurt my soul I can't believe that someone would do this to Rose. How anyone could do this to another human I will never know. We got to the hospital and when the doctor tried to exam Rose she freaked out screamed and they had to sedate her. Jasper has brought me clothes and food and even clothes for Rose.

"Baby you need to get some sleep and I need to get to work." He tells me at the door to Rose's room. He his holding his hand against my cheek which is where Rose slapped me I am pale enough that I know I will bruise.

"I called James I am not going home I can't leave her here like this." I tell Jasper my heart is broken right now my best friend is in shambles and there is nothing I can do for her. Jasper is holding my face and I turn my face into his warm hand. He rubs my bruised cheek with his thumb.

"I will be back when I get off I can bring you some clothes. Bella please get some rest I know this is hard for you. Call me if you need me." He says quietly then kisses me again and wipes away the tears that are falling because I don't know what to say I feel guilty for keeping him up all night when he doesn't have to be here. Jasper leaves for work and I promise that I will call him later. I sit back with my sketch pad and draw trying to clear my thoughts some.

"Bells you didn't have to stay." I hear a small voice say I am just dozing off in the chair. I open my eyes and look toward the bed and there is my beautiful best friend. Her face is bruised, lip split she looks absolutely miserable. Her eyes are distant and bloodshot.

"You are my best friend I would follow you into hell. I need to call for the nurse the cops need to talk to you." I tell her holding her hand hoping that it offers her some easy comfort. I hate that she looks so broken here she has taken enough shit for two people in her life.

"Thank you for getting me and staying with me I love you." Rose says and I look back her she is looking out the window with tears running down her face.

"Ms. Hale I am Sue your nurse today. I called the officer that is investigating your assault. I will come back in and bring you the medication once the officer leaves." Sue says and Rose just nods still staring out the window. I sit and pull my phone out and text Jasper.

 _Hey babe Rose is awake and the cops are on their way. I hope your day is going okay. - B_

An hour or so later Nurse sue and two men walk in Rose stiffens as she sees the men.

"Hello I am Officer Uley this is my partner Officer Clearwater we need your statement from the incident last night. If we could ask your friend to step out so that we can talk she can come back as soon as we are down." The burly male cop says. I stand squeeze Roses hand.

"I will go get a cup of coffee and be here when they leave." I tell her walking toward the door its after 7 pm and I take my phone out and call Jasper.

"Hey baby is everything okay?" Jasper answers the phone and I smile into the phone because he really is amazing.

"Yeah Rose is awake and the cops are taking her statement now. I think I am going to come home tonight my whole body hurts from that damned chair and I need a shower." I tell him walking toward the cafeteria in search of coffee.

"I will be out of here in about an hour baby do you want to come home with me." He asks in my ear and that is exactly what I want is to go home with him and let him hold me.

"Let me talk to Rose and I will let you know handsome." I tell him knowing that I am going home with him either way I need his strength right now.

"We would like statement from you as well if you are willing to give one." Officer Uley says from behind me as I make my way back towards Rose's room.

"Yeah I am not sure anything that I have to say that could help. Rose called me around 11 last night she was crying and asked me to come get her and told me where she was. My boyfriend and I went to get her.I found her sitting on the curb bloody and crying. I only brought her here." I tell the cop picking at the cup and turning to look at him.

"Okay thank you for the information could you fill out your information here in case we need to contact you." The officer says and hands me the form and pen. I walk into Rose's room and she is crying I sit in the chair next to her bed she looks up at me with red rimmed eyes.

"Bella I am going home. My dad called and I want to go home. I need to be somewhere else I am sorry. I might come back but I don't know yet." Rose is crying sniffling and I pick up her hand and hold it in both of mine.

"Don't be sorry go home heal take some time for you I will always be here for you no matter what. You need to get better Rose and I know that will be hard to do from here I love you." I say to her watching her face she is sad and I hope that one day soon her light will come back.

" I have your medication ready." Sue comes in with a cup of medication and a small glass of water. Sue is a darker skinned warm woman and I am glad Rose has her.

"Are you going to be upset if I go home I am wiped out and would like a shower." I ask Rose as she is downing the pills. She starts to shake her head at me as Nurse Sue walks out.

"Not at all go home I am about to be snoring. I love you Bella thank you for everything tell Jasper thank you for me as well." Rose says and I stand and kiss her head.

"Eleventh and Cave," I tell the cabbie when I climb in. Rose went to sleep shortly after the medication. Jasper is still at work so I am going to meet him there. I sent him a text to tell him to wait on me.

"Hey Bella he is with a client right now. But you are welcome to go on back." Alice says from the front desk I drop a cupcake I picked up at the bakery on the way here.

"Oh I love you. You are now my favorite." She says to me hopping up and hugs me. I laugh at her exuberance at the tiny cake. I hug her back because today has been shit and the human contact is nice.

"No one can flirt with my girl but me ." I hear Jasper say walking up the hallway with Emmett trailing him with fresh ink on his hand. He wraps his arms around me kissing my neck. I smile at him and turn my head planting my lips on his.

"I brought cupcakes because chocolate makes everything better." I say and hand Jasper a cupcake and one for Emmett too.

"She keeps bringing me sweets and I will be stealing her from you Whitlock." Emmett says smashing the cupcake in his mouth laughing. Jaspers face contorts and he slaps Emmetts raw ink making him grunt.

"Don't make me write cocksucker in your next tattoo dickhead. She is mine leave it at that. I need to clean my station and then we can go home." Jasper says turning my hips towards the back I laugh at them. He walks off in front of me as Emmett speaks again.

"Home? You and Rose not joined at the hip?" Emmett says looking at me with his big grin. Which makes me

"Jasper and I aren't living together officially but Rose decided is going home soon. You should let her tell you what's going on through." I say turning to walk down to Jaspers room he is spraying down the chair. I sit in his rolling chair and watch him clean up and put away.

"You look exhausted baby I can finish this before my first appointment tomorrow let me take you home." Jasper says rubbing my back and I nod I am mentally and physically exhausted. I must fall asleep on the way home because I wake to Jasper laying me in the bed.

"Go back to sleep baby we will talk in the morning." Jasper says barely above a whisper and I don't argue I snuggle into the sheets. Jasper slides in next to me and I snuggle into his side.

"Jasper thank you for taking care of me I don't know if I could handle all this without you." I say to him and I am asleep before I hear any response.

The trip to Chicago is uneventful really I feel guilty for going because Rose is currently at our apartment packing with her parents and I am in Chicago at a tattoo convention. But she insisted that I go and I didn't want to ditch out on Jasper.

"I can't wait to tattoo you in front of all of those people and this take you back to our room and bury myself inside you." Jasper says against my ear making my nipples harden because I know he will and I will love it. I think that getting this tattoo will be much different then the others because now we are basically living together now that Rose is leaving our lease isn't up until this summer so we will see if I keep it or not. Her father paid the rent up as a consolation of her moving home which I told them both was unnecessary I could have handled it.

"I love knowing that everyone will see your artwork on my body its incredibly sexy." I tell him and kiss him softly. We both groan at the contact. Jasper is going to be tattooing a mermaid on right arm from the top of my shoulder to about an inch above my elbow. I am so excited but nervous as always but the thought of him tattooing me again is erotic.

"Oh I can promise you that I love seeing my artwork on your body it shows everyone that can see that you are mine and mine alone no one else gets to put art on your skin." He says to me squeezing my knee. I pull my legs under me and hold onto Jaspers arm and lay my head on his shoulder and he kisses my head as we settle in for the short flight.

Chaos absolute chaos is what the tattoo convention seems like there are a ton of people. Most people are scantily clad showing off all of the art working covering their bodies. I have spandex shorts on and a tank top on Jasper is about to start my tattoo and we have a crowd of onlookers.

"Okay baby you ready." He asks me after he gets the tattoo drawn on. He has drawn it a couple times free hand and now he has drawn in right onto my skin. I nod at him and grab my earbuds. He kisses me softly and sits in his chair and I turn on a new band to me The Dead South put my buds in and sit back. Jasper holds my arm and starts the tattooing. I close my eyes and check out all of the people standing here make me nervous. I drift in and out of sleep this tattoo has spots of searing pain like near my armpit it feels like being touched with a hot poker. I haven't thought much about how fast Jasper and I are moving really because I feel like our relationship has been so natural and fluid that when I think about where this is going I should be nervous but I am not. I turn and watch Jasper tattooing my arm his hair is pulled up in a ponytail and his eyes are sharp and focused as he drags the hot needle through my skin I can see that the outline is almost finished and I am glad I need to go pee and grab a drink. Jasper looks up at me and his eyes dilate and he smiles at me. I pull my earbuds out as he rolls his chair back and pats my leg setting the gun down.

"I need ten to use the bathroom and get a drink."I tell him stretching my arm out and make a fist.

"I will go to let me get this locked up." Jasper says setting his gun in the case. He gets the cabinet all locked up and we walk toward the bathrooms.

"Did you see the tattoo artist with the blond hair? He is so fucking hot I bet he fucks like a madman." I hear a girl say as I am using the bathroom I smile at her comment because she is right he is hot and fucks like a madman. Most women would feel jealous but I don't he is mine and I know that.

"He is with that girl he is tattooing though I heard him call her baby and when he was being asked about the tattoo he said that they came up with concept in bed at home." A second female voice chirps.

"Uh all the hot ones are taken but man would I like to ride him till the cows come home." The first girl says laughing. I leave the stall and both women are standing at the sink fixing their makeup and I smile at them in the mirror and they both flush.

"He is pretty amazing ladies let me tell you." I tell them and wink turning to grab paper towels and walk toward the exit. Jasper is leaning against the wall across from the door and he looks up at me and gives me the panty dropping smile as I walk into his embrace rewraps both arms around my middle while I stand on my tiptoes and kiss him until neither of us have any breath left.

"Come on beautiful lets go get a drink and start shading before I throw you over my shoulder and take you to the hotel. Every man we walk by can't keep his eyes off of you. It makes me want to make them watch me fuck you silly." He tells me with that animalistic look on his face.

"I just overheard a conversation in the bathroom about how good you must fuck. So I don't want to hear your shit about looks." I tell him smiling because I love that he is mine when other women want him so much. I grab a water and a grape juice while Jasper grabs two glasses of water and we walk back toward the setup. Emmett is tattooing a beautiful black and grey wolf's face on a man's calf him and the guy are chattering away with one another and the onlookers. Jasper sets the second set of water down for him and he mocks salutes as a thank you to Jasper and we make our way back to his station. He gets stopped multiple times by people asking questions and making comments about his portfolio book his tattoos and even looking at my tattoos and asking about them. Jasper cleans the tattoo which is oozing plasma and gets ready to start shading. We talk through shading with each other and the folks standing around when we get home all the notes have taken will have to finish out my school work. Judging starts in a few hours which is plenty of time for Jasper to finish up and doctor the tattoo.


	6. All these changes

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

"What convention are you going to next?" I ask Jasper a few days after we get home from Chicago. My mermaid won 2nd place at the convention I finished my work and sent in into my advisor and now it is a waiting game to see if it gets approved or not.

"You're hooked now aren't you." He smiles up at me from the sketch pad on his lap. We are hanging out on his couch today my tattoo is itching today and he keeps giving me side eye.

"Yeah a little there was a rush in being there I had a blast." I tell him and I really did I haven't ever used recreational drugs but I feel like that is what it would feel like.

"There is a convention in LA over the summer that we are signed up to go to. I want to go home in June and I want you to come home with me and meet my folks." He tells me still scotching in his pad. I don't answer because I don't know what answer is the right one I would love to meet his parents but what will they think.

"My parents will be here in May I want you to meet them." I tell him looking back down at my kindle. We are just relaxing on a comfortable day off like every other couple on the planet.

"You want to take me home to meet your cop father? Are you sure?" He sounds skeptical and the look on his face isn't skeptical it's cocky and hot. I laugh a little knowing that my dad will be gruff with him but if he is good to me dad wont care and my mom is all about love.

"Yup you are going to meet my cop dad and then we can tell them that your responsible for my newest tattoos and that we are shacking up." I tell him with a straight face. He still has his eyebrows raised at me and now he it tapping his pencil on the pad.

"I guess if he doesn't kill me then maybe we should tell him how good I fuck you and how often we fuck as well." He says back to me with that slick grin on his face and I laugh out loud. He throws his sketchbook on the table and tackles me back on the couch landing right between my legs making me laugh louder.

"Are you keeping your apartment when the lease is up or are we going to stop playing around and you move in here for real."He looks down at me his eyes are sharp.

"I would only move in with someone if I was asked I am not a girl who makes assumptions." I tell him in an equally serious tone and I am being serious.

" I don't play games Bella it is not my thing we stay together every night. I am in this move in with me be with me. If you thought any different then you haven't been paying attention baby." Jasper tells me he is holding my hands above my head and leaning down kissing my lips slipping his tongue into my mouth.

"This has all happened so fast Jasper don't you think.I love being here and being with you but this summer everything changes for me I will graduate and I will have to choose what I want to do with it. What if that choice takes me away from here? What do we do then I have never been in a relationship like this. I am not playing either this is not a game I am just as in this as you." I tell him after we pull apart I know this is not what he wants to hear but it's the truth.

"So you won't make a decision why? I get it I have never felt the way that I feel about you before and I am enjoying every moment of what we have. This will change as time goes on and we will change as well but I want to be with you through that." Jasper says he has gotten to his feet now and is pacing.

"Can't we just enjoy the now Jasper and worry about the change when it comes." I ask and I know how I feel about him and he shows me how he feels but I don't want any added pressure in my life right now what Jasper and I have is easy and comforting.

"Sure I need to go to the shop I will be back in a few hours. I am not telling you that you have to choose but I can't be half in half out." Jasper says and grabs his keys letting the door slam behind him.

I am standing backstage at graduation shaking from head to toe. This is it the culmination of almost a decade of school, thousands and thousands of hours of research, studying, writing and painting. I will be walking the stage today and on my way to the rest of life.

"Isabella Swan." Dean Webber calls and I walk toward him and take the pseudo diploma and shake his hand the my advisor the director of the art department. I was worried I would bust my ass which doesn't happen but I don't make it across the stage without big alligator tears falling down my face. This degree is a culmination of years of my life what am I supposed to do now. I have been selling out at the gallery and painting all the time Jasper lets me use a room in the shop as a studio which is convenient.

"Mom, Dad this is Jasper Whitlock, Jasper this is my mom and dad, Renee and Charlie." I say making introductions as my parents find Jasper and I standing together after the ceremony. Jasper shakes my dads hand and kisses my moms cheek which makes her blush and me laugh.

"Ma'am, Sir its nice to meet you both I have heard a lot about you." Jasper says stepping back and wrapping his arm back around me. All the anxiety I have had today melts away at his touch. I can't believe that he makes me feel this way I just don't know how is that even possible I didn't try to fall in love but I can't imagine my life without him now.

"You the man my daughter is shacking up with." My dad says to Jasper and gives him the side eye. But shakes his hand none the less and I give my dad a look.

"I have sir," Jasper says and I know that my dad is impressed that Jasper is telling him the truth and not cowering.

"Nice to meet you Jasper I have heard a lot about you." My mom says with a smile as Jasper leans forward and kisses her cheek.

"Anything bad was a lie." Jasper says with a chuckle and mom laughs too.

We take mom and dad to Hugo's which is our favorite seafood restaurant. We are seated when we arrive because I have made reservations we eat and drink for a couple hours. I take mom and dad back to my apartment and get them settled in.

"We are going home now I will be here about 10 in the morning I have plans to show you guys around some." I tell them as we get ready to leave with the last box of my personal stuff from the house.

"So you're not even going to stay here while we are here Bells." My dad says sounding pissy about this fact but I already told them I don't really live here anymore. I changed my address earlier in the week even though I have failed to tell Jasper that yet.

"Dad please don't start that I have lived with Jasper for months and Rose moved home. The lease is up at the end of the month and I won't be renewing it." I tell my dad and look over at Jasper we got into our first fight over this exact subject and we just didn't discuss it again. He is smiling at me and I know that this makes him happy.

"If you get my daughter pregnant and don't marry her I will kill you and no one will ever know." My dad says to Jasper with a straight face and an icy edge to his voice.

"I wouldn't disrespect her like that sir I care way to much for her." Jasper says putting his arm around my shoulders.

"Your grandma Swan wouldn't approve but I know that times have changed so as long as your happy I will deal with it but know that I don't approve in the least and if he hurts you I will take action." My dad tells me and kisses my forehead.

"You're officially moving in huh." Jasper says as we drive back home. I roll my eyes at him because my apartment has been packed for a while and we had slowly been taking boxes to his house. He is so full of shit but I will let him have this win. I wasn't sure I wanted to move in but I decided that living in the moment is important. Rose is still in Washington and for now she had no plans to come back to New York and I can't really blame her she is working at one of her dads businesses and she seems happy. Her and Emmett have been talking and are having a long distance thing.

I take my parents out the next day on a little tour of New York they have been here a few times since I moved here but not in the last couple of months. Dad isn't a big fan of the city itself its too dangerous for his girl but he has had his say over the years and I am still here.

"This is the gallery I work at we can come back tonight if you want I am showing some pieces. We show a diverse amount of art from super famous painters to unknown street artists." I tell them as we pass the door we have been to the empire state building and walked through time square now we are on our way to the ferry boat to take a tour of the river and see the statue of liberty. Mom loves the tourist game but dad just shuffles alone after us all over the Boroughs. My phone buzzes in my pocket.

"Hey baby I should be out of here in an hour. Are we going to have dinner with the rents or you want me to just come home?" Jaspers sexy timber croons in my ear. I sigh we are sitting on the ferry and my feet are killing me and my head hurts and I want to go home and let Jasper hold me.

"I will make them dinner at home I am exhausted." I tell him and smile at the relaxation that just his voice brings to me.

"No baby I will pick something up for dinner. I will meet you at home." Jasper says and I can hear him moving around on the other end of the phone.

"Thank you babe I don't know what I would do without you." I tell him and we hang up there after.

I jump in the shower as soon as we get home and I almost fall asleep in the water. The exhaustion has gotten worse over the last two month and when I went to see my doctor all he told me was it was stress. Jaspers knock startles me out of my reprieve and I realize I must have sit down in the shower but I don't remember doing it.

"Are you okay baby?" Jasper calls out from the crack in the door. He must have just gotten home mom and dad are downstairs.

"Yeah, I am good," I say standing up and everything goes black.

Jasper

I hear the crash as I am walking away from the door. I turn back and throw the door open and see Bella laying in the bottom of the shower. I scream out help I check her pulse and it is very slow. Charlie comes in the bathroom in a rush and I know that my face looks panicked because I am.

"Call 911 she feel and her pulse is very slow she has a gash in her head." I yell at Charlie and he grabs his phone out of his pocket. I am kneeling on the floor at Bella's side. I know from my training I should move her.

"Yes, we need help my daughter has lost conciseness while in the shower. She has a head wound that is bleeding. Whats the address son?" His voice is even words clear and concise and he sounds like every first responder I have ever known. I repeat the address to him grab a towel and rag and turn the water off of Bella. I cover her with the towel and press the rag to the gash on her head.

The ambulance transports her to the hospital and Bella's dad rides with her. Renee and I hop in my SUV after I grab Bella a pair of undies and pj's knowing that when she wakes up she will want them.

"She will be fine Jasper she is strong." Renee tells me as she pats my hand I haul ass to the hospital. The wait is agonizing for me I can't lose her she is the only woman I have ever loved.

Tumor, tumor, tumor the word is bouncing around in my head like a bullet in the body cavity every time it repeats the bullet hits another organ. I am sitting in the waiting room and the woman that has changed my life is laying on an operating table fighting for her life. Charlie is sitting on the small sofa across the room holding his wife who has cried herself to sleep. By the time I got to the ER they had Bella in CT and when the doctor came out he looked like he would rather die then be there. The CT scan found a golf ball size tumor in her left lung. She was rushed into surgery and she hadn't opened her eyes. She had some internal bleeding which was the reason for the black out and a concussion from the fall. The doctor asked if she had any symptoms and I told him that yes she had been tired, loss of appetite and some weight loss. I thought it was from work and her dissertation and subsequent acceptance for her doctorate. Now I am sitting in a fucking waiting room waiting to hear if the woman I am in love with will be here tomorrow. At some point I must pass out because I wake up to Charlie.

"Son wake up." I hear a male voice and a slight tap on my shoulder slowly I open my eyes and the first thing that registers is the pain in my neck and back and the second is Charlie standing in front of me with tears in his eyes. My heart clinches and I gasp for breath grabbing my chest.

"I am awake but please don't tell me she is gone," I tell him and the first tears that I have cried in years spring to my eyes.

"She is in her room now you can go see her now. We told them you were her husband because ICU only allows family in." Charlie tells me patting my shoulder lightly.

"When she wakes up I will make that a true statement when she allows it." I tell him and he nods at me and goes to sit with his wife. I wipe my eyes and go to her room and I am not prepared to see her this way. She looks like she is asleep except the hose that is in her mouth her hands are to her sides. I sit next to her and pick up her hand and press the palm to my mouth and I cry again I just let myself feel everything that I do in this moment I fucking love this woman and I will bow to her every whim if she will just come back to me. I eat and sleep at the hospital. Bella is moved to a regular room after 3 days and the intimation tube is taken out but she still hasn't woken up. I called the shop the first night and told Emmett that there was no way I would be leaving the hospital anytime soon. Emmett told me that Alice would contact my clients and let them know I had a family emergency. 3 of the longest weeks of my life the doctors are unsure why she hasn't woken up yet. I am asleep in a chair next to her when I hear gagging and coughing. I sit up ram rod straight and see those chocolate brown eyes.

Bella

Ugh, what the hell why does my throat hurt so bad and I can't move anything. I try to open my eyes but they don't work at all and I can't even swallow.

What has happened to me? I can hear the repetitive beeping I still can swallow but now I know that there is something in my mouth and I try pushing it out with my tongue. My eyes open this time and I move my fingers and feel a very warm hand touch mine I try to turn my head but I can't move my neck.

"Oh baby the nurse is coming stay still please." I hear Jasper before I see him he leans over the bed and I see his face his cheeks are sunken in a little and his beard is longer and not maintained at all. I know that whatever has happened to me is bad if he is here and there is a tube down my throat. I feel Jaspers hand against my face and knowing that he is here makes me feel better. The nurse walks in and takes the tape off of my face and disconnects the tube from the mouth piece.

"Okay, I need you to try and push the mouth piece out now." She tells me getting wet wipes out of a cabinet and I do what she says and push the piece in my mouth out with my tongue and then take a breath in that hurts like hell and makes me a cough and tears leak from my eyes.

"Don't try and talk yet hon your throat is still going to be very raw from tube your doctor will be in shortly he is in surgery right now and we are waiting to hear is we can give you some liquids." The nurse tells me after she cleans my face up and writes on the clipboard attached to the end of my bed.

"I don't think I have ever been this relieved in my entire life." Jasper says from the seat next to my bed with his head against my hand I can feel the tears drop on my hand and I look down at him I am crying too. What the hell happened to me the last thing I remember is being in the shower.

"You can't do this to me again do you understand me. I thought I would never see those beautiful eyes again. You can't make me love you and try to leave me." He tells me kissing my hands and he runs his hand across my cheeks. His words hit their mark he loves those words make my heart jump and tears spring to my eyes.

"I know not the best time but I couldn't wait I have told you I love you every day for then last three weeks praying that I would see you again. I called your parents they are on there way the doctor will tell you everything." He says and the look in his eyes cuts me deep. His face has paled and his facial hair is unkept as is the hair on his hair.

My mom and dad show up and my mom is a blubbering mess and my dad has been crying because his eyes are red and puffy. I haven't seen my dad cry since my grandma died. The doctor comes in shortly after my parents.

"Now that the whole bunch is here its about time we discuss what happened here. your husband said that you blacked out in the shower you were brought in by ambulance and we did a CT scan to rule out brain injury. We found a mass the size of a golf ball in your lung, some internal bleeding from the pressure of the tumor, and a bleed in your brain." He says and my eyes bounce between Jasper and the doctor because I am sure I heard him say husband and Jasper just shrugs.

"You had emergency surgery where we removed the entire tumor and sent it off to pathology. You have been unconscious for 3 weeks. Your brain bleed cleared itself up on its own which is good news. You should be able to go home soon the pathology results showed us that the tumor showed cancerous cells and it was a large tumor that had its own blood vessels." The doctor says and his face is grim.


	7. The Lone Star in the sky

"Jasper you can go home if you want I am okay." I tell him he is nodding in the chair next to mine he hasn't left the hospital since I woke up yesterday and I know he didn't leave much before that. My body is weak and I hurt everywhere. My man looks exhausted.

"Not a chance I am not letting you out of my sight this has been hell baby I thought I had lost you." He tells me not even opening his eyes. I know that this is hard on him and I feel bad for burdening him even for love.

"Then come hold me please." I tell him scooting all the way to one side of the bed and he looks at me and I can see the longing in his eyes. I just want to feel something other than sadness.

"I don't want to hurt you." He tells me and I hate that he is so timid with me but I understand that he has watched me every day for 3 weeks.

"Please Jasper I need to feel you against me." I tell him knowing that he will crack at that. He groans and gets up kicks his shoes off and grabs the blanket sliding in next to me wrapping his arm around my shoulders tucking me in against his chest.

"I just wanted thank you for being here with me and lying to stay with me. But this isn't the end of hospital stays for me you don't have to stay." I say and he pulls back and looks at me holding my chin in his hand. I try to pull back from him I am going to break his heart I might die this can't continue.

"If you think for a split second that I will leave you are a crazy woman. The fact that I have sat in this room everyday for three weeks praying that you would wake up and now that you have I couldn't be happier that your awake. We will get through this the tumor is gone and there will be follow up but you are strong, I didn't lie your dad did and I didn't correct them." He says kissing my head sighing. I am content in his arms this is right no doubt in my mind how I feel about him but are we stupid for doing this with this over our heads.

"One day though it will be true and you will be mine completely" He says so low that I think I am not supposed to hear him but I don't say anything I am far too tired. Mom and Dad go home the next day they have both burned all of their days off and then some. I am sad to see them go but I understand Rose visited me while I was unconscious but only stayed a few days. Jasper said that James has been here at least once a week and they text regularly to check up on me. Jasper has canceled his spot for the convention in LA which I told him was unnecessary but he is hurting I can see it so I let it go. James wants me to take some more time off as well and I don't know what will happen.

"Lets go to my home in Texas you can meet my folks but you and I can get some relaxation time in. I have a house down there with no neighbors." Jasper says wagging his eyebrows and I don't need to answer because I am afraid of what could happen with me. Why would he want to get more ingrained with me? I don't answer him I just let the exhaustion take over and the comfort that he provides.

"You should not be in the bed with her sir it is against policy." I hear a whisper yell and I am perfectly warm that I don't want to move I hear Jaspers heart thudding against my ear. I refuse to move or open my eyes he is my happy place.

" I know but she asked and after the last weeks of watching her helpless in this bed how could I refuse her." Jasper says to the nurse that fussed at him. She laughs lightly and I imagine that he is giving her that grin that no one can say no too.

"I will let it slide because you haven't left her side since she was brought in. You have every nurse on his floor in love." She says to him and I can hear the smile in her voice and Jasper confirms this by chuckling. I fell back asleep quickly because the next thing I know it is dark Jasper is gone and the doctor is listening to my chest.

"Hello your husband just went home to pick up your clothes we are getting your discharge paper work together now we will wait until he gets back to give you the aftercare instructions. But with the diagnoses you have there will be some follow up. " He tells me and I can't wait to get the hell out of here.

"Thank you doc I appreciate everything. I do have a question though while we are alone. What are the chances that it has already spread or will spread?" I ask him because before Jasper and I go any further I want to know what the chances are that I am sick all the time. He deserves a woman who can keep up with his life no a sickly woman that he has to take care of.

"These things just happen and if I am being candid the possibility of you getting another random tumor is higher than someone who has never had one. We have done a lot of scans and it looks like the cancer was sustained in the tumor. I would like to discuss the rest with your husband here." The doctor tells me and pats my hand I just nod at him and turn over when he walks out.

"I got you some of your more comfortable clothes to go home in," Jasper says pulling out a pair of billowy shorts and a large tank top out and my sandals.

"Now that you are back lets discuss care going forward. I am prescribing you enough pain killers for 2 weeks and you need to take it easy. No running for a couple weeks you will have to easy back into that, no lifting, and be sure that if your pain gets worse go to the nearest ER. I am going to refer you to oncology these types of tumors are usually followed with a few rounds of chemo an or radiation to make sure that the cancer has not spread." I nod because I am stuck in my head over the fact that this is likely to happen again I am freaking out.

"Can you refer me to someone in Texas we will be heading out soon." I tell him. The doctor nods and walks out. I look at Jasper who is smiling at me since I did answer him before. I want to be happy with him damn the consequences.

"I got us a flight out here in a few days we will be in Texas before the week is out," Jasper says to me holding my hand in the car and I am glad he is excited but I can't get over the fact that I almost died and it could happen again at any time which I understand that death works that way for everyone but after this scare I am freaked out.

" Are you sure that I am what you want? While I was in the hospital I know it wasn't easy. But this is just beginning." I tell him because I have watch someone I love lay in a hospital and fight for life.

"I would do it all over again any day I know that this has you scared but I am in this baby lets go to Texas and relax. I have some work set up in a buddies shop while I am there. We can do whatever you want." Jasper tells me and looks over at me. I nod because the thought of living without him is not okay.

When we get home I get to shower for the first time in weeks and I see my body for the first time. I have to hold on to the counter my chest is yellow with healing bruises the scar across my right side is only about 6 inches and is angry looking still I can't tell if the stitches are gone yet. I am crying big alligator tears I can see my ribs, hip bones and collar bone all poking out. I have lost to much weight I look sickly with a yellowed tint to so much of my skin makes me look like I have jaundice. Chemo and radiation will make me more sick what in the hell am I supposed to do.

"Bella please unlock the door." I hear Jasper say from the bedroom. I take a deep breath and go to the door.

" You can't see me like this Jasper I look horrible." I say to him and I am sniffling because if he sees my like this he will never want to have sex with me again. I don't want to look at myself and I know he wont like what he sees.

"Please open the door Bella you could never look horrible but you can't lock this door. The last time I left you in this bathroom alone I almost lost you. Please just unlock the door." Jasper sounds desperate and I can hear him hit the door either his head or his hand. I relent to him and unlock the door. I turn away from the door so that he can't see me. He cracks the door but doesn't come in.

"I know you don't want me to see you so I won't come in.I could never think that you look anything but amazing baby but you deserve privacy. I just need this door to be open for my sanity. If you need anything let me know." Jasper says and walks away from the door. I sigh in relief because I don't want him to see me like this but I know that he is just worried about me. I shouldn't be this way with him I know he loves me but I know that I need a moment to myself.

"Do you feel better baby?" Jasper asks me from the space on the bed he is occupying he is propped up reading a book. He is sitting in his boxer briefs in the bed his eyes look tired. I hope that now that we are home he will rest better.

"Yeah I do I feel a little more human with clean hair and your t-shirt." I say smiling at him and pulling the hem of his shirt. Being home with him in our space makes me happy I climb on the bed with him and he raises his arm and I tuck myself into his side. If this is what he wants then how could I ever turn him away. We are both going into this knowing what could happen.

" I love you too Jasper and there is a chance that I am going to break your heart I don't want to hurt you." I tell him and he takes my hand and like the coward that I now am I don't look up at him. He tucks his hand under my chin raising my face up so I have to look at him.

"Baby I have waited for you my entire life without knowing you were there. Now I have you and you are mine to keep. We will get through this together." Jasper says and the look in his eyes is heart stopping I know him well enough to know that he is a determined man when he wants something.

"Welcome to San Antonio International airport where local time is 1:10pm and the temperature is 93 degrees." The flight attendant says as we are taxing up to the gate. Our flight was easy from New York.

"Ahhh back home with my lady in tow. This is going to be great my parents will love you baby." He says with his mega watt smile in place I laugh at his exuberance. Jasper leans over and kisses me and I smile against his lips.

"Jazzy." I hear a woman screech as we get to baggage claim. Jasper closes his eyes and then turns. I laugh a little at the nickname my mom is just as bad.

"Hi momma." Jasper says to a beautiful woman who is at least 5' 8" and has strawberry blonde hair and the same blue eyes as Jasper. He hugs her and I try to pull my hand away and Jasper doesn't let it go. He hugs his mom with one arm and shakes his dads hand.

"Y'all got a lot of bags?" Jaspers dad asks and immediately I know what Jasper will look like in 30 years. The man behind his mom is handsome closely cropped hair white as snow and a mustache that would rival Tom Sellecks. If we are still together he will be a sexy man still. That doesn't surprise me at all.

"Yeah a few we plan on staying awhile. Bella graduated and we don't really have anything pressing to get to in New York." He says smiling at me and I wish I could genuinely smile. Trepidation has taken up residence in my mind and as happy as I am to meet his parents I am freaking out.

"Momma, pop this is my Bella, Bella these are my parents Sherman and Grace." He says but is cut off by his mom she steps in and hugs me. I am shocked to say the least I have obviously been in New York to long because the sudden contact makes me stiffen.

"You can call me Momma too no need be formal." She says squeezing me a little and then jumping back when I yelp. I didn't mean to scare her but the squeeze hurts my side.

"Oh darlin I am so sorry I forgot I am just so glad that you are here and you brought my boy home." She says with tears in her eyes and I get the feeling that Jasper doesn't come home often. Him and I are alike in that I don't go home either.

"I am Sherman but you can call me Pop if you want. It is nice to meet you and my son did not exaggerate you are a beautiful young woman." He says hugging me lightly and he chuckles as I blush. My parents have not ever been touchy-feely but this family is and for me I will need to get used to it.

"Really pop she is all mine leave her alone." Jasper jokes and hugs his dad and his mom pulls my elbow and we walk towards the door. She is a force I can already tell and knowing that she raised boys on a ranch I know that this is a woman that has a solid back bone.

"Momma that stealing my woman goes for you too." Jasper yells after us and his mom laughs beside us. She is like Jasper with her wide grin and open face. I will love her I already know this.

"Thank you for bringing him home he hasn't ever really brought a girl home so I have a lot of embarrassing stories of my boy when Y'all come for dinner." She says to me smiling even wider which I didn't know was possible. When the automatic doors open the humid heat sweeps in ruffling my hair. The sun is out and the heat is nice after the cold winter in New York.

The Whitlock home is 30 minutes from the city and far off the beaten path. It's a one story ranch style home the property is absolutely beautiful I haven't seen this much open space in a long time and walking in this place feels like home.

"Momma I am going to take Bella home lets go to Magnolia House for breakfast maybe 10. I know that's late for you and dad but I don't want to have to get up early this is a pseudo-vacation." Jasper says after we have eaten dinner his mom made pot roast and I am a little jealous that Jasper got to eat her food his whole life while I had to endure Renee's concoctions.

"It is beautiful out here Jasper thank you for bringing me here," I tell him while I look out the window and see pitch black no houses, no cars which are a drastic difference to Seattle or New York.

"You are the only person I have ever brought out here Isabella. I want you to be here with me. Take us away from everything that has happened." Jasper says and I can see him in the dashboard lights he is looking at me. I unbuckle my seatbelt and scoot over to him he wraps his arm around me and kisses my ride in silence toward his house in the land. When we stop Jasper helps me out of the truck and grabs our bags. We walk up the three stairs to the front door I cant see the whole house its to dark out there.

"Why don't you have a seat and I will drop our bags inside and bring us some drinks we can sit out here for a while and we can relax." Jasper says dropping a kiss to my lips I slide my flip-flops off and curl my legs up under me in the porch swing as I sit. Looking off the porch I can see the slight hill and past the cleared land is woods. I have never been somewhere so silent I can hear nothing but crickets and I am glad suddenly that Jasper brought me here this is what I need right now somewhere I can heal.

"You look more beautiful sitting here on my front porch than I have ever seen any woman in my life." Jasper says walking out on the porch with two bottles of water. He looks more relaxed than I have seen him since I have known him. I smile at him and take the bottle of water that he is offering. He sits next to me and I lay my legs over his. We sit in companionable silence it is nice to be able to just be with someone.

"What was it like growing up here? It is so peaceful here." I ask him think of growing up in a large city. Seattle is beautiful don't get me wrong and the forest in the area are unbeatable. But this openness is different its open and free.

"I had a great life here my parents run a cattle ranch that I worked on for as long as I can remember its hard work but very fulfilling. I grew up knowing where everything I ate came from the animals that we raised or hunted. My parents where amazing they loved us kids and taught us right from wrong. I rode in rodeos for a few years which drove momma crazy and she finally got me to stop but I was an adrenaline junkie from a young age so anything I could do that was risky I did. I joined the navy and didn't even tell my parents I just came home one day and told them hey y'all I joined the navy and go to war. I thought my momma was going to keel over. My older brother Edward which you met seemed happy the ranch was all his and he wouldn't have to deal with me when he graduated college. Everything has changed now I am planning to come back my brother spun off a few years back ran off stole money and shit from my parents. I can't let this ranch go it has been in the family for a little over a century. " He says and I realize that this is his forever he will end up living here and running his ranch that thought is sobering.

"When do you plan on moving?" I ask and my voice is small which I don't like but I don't know how to fix it. He is going to move back to Texas and I live in New York I knew I would lose him. My chest tightens and I have to hold back tears. I suddenly wish that I had stayed home then this wouldn't hurt.

"Sooner rather than later my dad is getting older and I haven't lived here since I joined the service. I need to learn the running of the ranch vs working on the ranch." Jasper says and doesn't look up at me. He has been thinking about this for a while and didn't even talk to me about it.

"I see so this trip permanent," I tell him trying not to snap at him I want to though I am upset that he hasn't mentioned the fact that he is moving away from me.

"Not yet baby but probably before long I will be needing to moving back." Jasper says looking up at me then and his eyes look wet he knows that this is a turning point for us. Why did he bring me here? Show me this life and break my heart in the end. I start to cry at the loss that is inevitable he will leave to come home and I will be across the country. Maybe I will move home then I won't have to look around New York and see him. Jasper reaches over and grabs my hand but I yank it away. I don't want his comfort.

"Why would you do this Jasper? Bring me here show me what your life will be when you move here how happy you will be and you're amazing parents. How is this okay?" I ask him becoming hysterical because he cant be this cruel to me can he. After everything in the last month and all of his kindness and love.

"I wanted to see how you like it and I am hoping to get you to come here with me. I know that I didn't tell you baby but after the hospital stay how was I supposed to bring this up. I just wanted to be with you." Jasper says to me wiping the tears off my face and pulling my chin up and kissing me. I am suppose to give up my life in New York in a snap just like that.


	8. Live like this is it

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

I want you to come with me and for the second time in a week I am speechless. What do I say? Is this even a possibility? We have been together a few months and lived together momentarily. This is in a whole other spectrum.

"Lets get to bed we have breakfast with my parents and then you have a doctors appointment at 2." Jasper says pulling me to my feet and walking me in the house. I am stunned into silence and I know that I should say something so that Jasper knows I don't hate the idea but I don't know what to say.

We lay together in bed back to back and don't say another word. I drive off to sleep thinking of us old and grey sitting on the front porch.

The pancake house that we go to for breakfast is possibly the best breakfast I have ever eaten. Even though there is a stone in the pit of my stomach. Jaspers mom and dad are so nice his mom wants me to go to a local art exhibit with her this weekend and I tell her that I am not sure how I will be feeling and she looks at me funny.

"Did you not tell your parents whats going on?" I whisper in Jaspers ear and he shakes his head. He is too sweet for his own good. I don't want them to think that I am trapping him.

"Not my business to tell baby if you want them to know we can tell them." He tells me and I sigh because I don't want to tell anyone ever I wish it wasn't a factor. That isn't the case this is real life and right now it sucks. They deserve to know that the woman that their son brought home is sick.

"Momma pop there are a few reasons Bella and I came down. One is because I wanted to show Bella the area and the ranch the other is because Bella got sick in New York. I told y'all that she was in the hospital but she is going to require further treatment." Jasper is telling this and he is holding my hand on the table but I can't look up I feel ashamed and for what I don't know.

"She had a cancerous tumor in her lung they took it out but want her to undergo chemo or radiation at least two rounds. So we came here it will be easier on us both I think to be here and conferrable. More so than in NYC so her and I took some time off." Jasper finishes and lets go of my hand wrapping his arm around me and pulling me into him. I am crying I have my face covered. I love him and right now I know that I will fight this as hard as I can so that I can be with him as long as he will have me.

"Oh Bella sweetheart I am so sorry but hon I am glad you came here we can make sure your taken care of." Jaspers mom says which causes a fresh wave of tears reaching across the table handing me a tissue. I am blubbering in the middle of a freaking restaurant but fuck it.

" Y'all come by for dinner tonight please. I am so glad y'all are here and I know there isn't any food in that house." Jaspers mom says with a little laugh at the end. She is doing what she knows to make the situation light and I appreciate her.

"If Bella feels up to it we will. We should actually get going she has an appointment at University here in about an hour." Jasper says and starts to stand.

"Thank you both for breakfast." I say and wipe my face. His mom goes to hug me and whispers in my ear.

"You will beat this honey it takes a strong woman to love a man like my son." I smile at her words she is sweet and welcoming.

"I would suggest that we do one round of chemotherapy and no radiation for now don't think that we need to be overly aggressive. I have studied all of your scans and as far as I can tell you are at a very low risk that the cancer has spread. I am going to prescribe you a low dose of an chemo and we are going to scan once a week for the next month and a once a week blood draw. We will reevaluate in 6 weeks and if you're completely clear then your next scan will be 3 months from then okay." The doctor tells Jasper and I as we sit in his office and I let out a huge sigh in relief. I thought that this was it honesty cancer is always a death sentence I thought but I may have been wrong.

"Now lets talk side effects they can be very bad or non existent. Vomiting, diarrhea, hair loss, weight loss, skin discoloration. I will prescribe you an anti-nausea medication and a pain killer it is likely that the day of and after you wont have much of an appetite and you're likely to be very tired." The doctor tells me this and hands me a package of papers. I have looked up these treatments online already and know for the most part what to expect. Jasper is right I wont be able to do much at all for a few days after the treatments.

"My nurse will call you with the schedule of your treatments and you will need someone to bring you and take you home. If you need anything my on call phone number is in that document feel free to call." The doctor says and shakes my hand and then Jaspers and leaves the room. We both sit stalk still for a few minutes before I shake my head and stand up.

"Come on handsome lets blow this popsicle stand." I tell him reaching down for his hand he stands smiling at me.

Jasper and I leave the hospital hand and hand I have a bag with medication in it. I am nervous and not sure what to say about the whole thing. I am relieved that there will be no radiation because all of the reading I had done on cancer treatment said that the combo was for bad cases. So the fact that the doc changed my treatment means that the cancer isn't as bad as they thought.

"You are awfully quiet over there beautiful what is going on in that head of yours." Jasper says to me after were driving home.

"I am going to beat this Jasper." I say to him and I mean it I am going to fight like hell.

"Oh I know you are baby because you are stuck with me no leaving me like that." Jasper says and kisses my knuckles. His words are exactly what I am afraid of. I look at him and he looks so free here he has a lazy smile on his face driving down the road. It strikes me like a bolt of lightning I want him here like this in this life. But how do I do that how do I walk away from an education that I busted my ass for and all of the money I spent. How do I tell James I am not coming back? What will I do here? I want him though more than anything I have ever wanted in my entire life. I would give it all up for him. This is what love feels like the books aren't wrong I guess this love changes everything.

"I feel like complete shit sorry momma." I say I am laying on the Whitlock's couch feeling like I have been ran over. It is the day after my first cancer treatment and I have been puking since one am

"It is okay sweetheart I grew up with brothers and I have lived on a ranch with men my whole adult life. You cant say much to offend me but I really hate that you feel bad. Jasper left these for you to take in about an hour." She says shaking a pill box and I just nod at her. Jasper is out helping clean up a fallen tree from last nights storm.

"Thank you momma I appreciate you letting me lay on your couch and take your time up today." I tell her not even opening my eyes. The room feels like it is spinning and I am laying still. Every joint in my body feels like it is on fire. This must be what hell feels like.

"Baby come on wake up." I hear Jaspers voice in my ear and I just grunt at him I am not sure I have the strength to open my eyes. I was having a dream about little blood haired children and horses. These drugs are the business if I do say so myself.

"It is time to get up and eat dinner baby." He says to me running his hand over my face. I try again to open my eyes and when I do I see my handsome man in tight jeans and a plaid shirt rolled up at the sleeves and his hair in a pony tail and his face smudged with dirt. He looks glorious but the stench of shit hits me like a mac truck making my stomach royal in protest.

"You should not be that sexy when I feel like this it is not fair really. But did you step in cow shit today?" I tell him and honestly it is true because he looks so fucking sexy and I feel like death. He leans down and kisses me laughing.

"You are always devastatingly beautiful baby and I may have fields are full of cow patties." He says and leans back pulling me up to a sitting position and my stomach cramps and I run toward the bathroom and slide to the tile hard before the heaves hit me. I haven't eaten since this morning and the dry heaving is terrible. Jasper comes in a few seconds after I get in the bathroom and I am crying.

"Please go Jasper I don't need you seeing me like this." I tell him and heave again. I don't have anything except water on my stomach but this is not a good look on anyone. I have tears rolling down my face because throwing up hurts and bad.

"Here put this under your tongue it will melt." He says handing me an almost flat disk and I put it below my tongue and pray it stays as I start heaving again. Jasper does me the courtesy of walking out of the bathroom. The medication he gave me works fast and after rinsing my mouth and face I leave the bathroom.

"You feel any better?" Jasper asks from his spot on the couch his face is etched with discomfort and I nod sitting down next to him. I didn't look around the room which I learn is a quick mistake.

"Damn brother did you knock the little art girl up already? You wasted no time bringing the whore home to meet momma and pop and take your rightful place as the prodigal son." I hear Edwards voice cut through the room and don't even bother looking up. I don't have the strength to give a damn. Jasper on the other hand is wound up like a ten day clock. I look up about the same time the crack echoes out and Jaspers mom screams. I jump up and grab Jasper pulling him back I step in front of him and grab his face he looks down at me and closes his eyes.

"There you go let the woman control you thats the way to cop out. That was a good punch good to know that pussy hasn't softened you to much." Edward says from behind me snidely and I look at Jasper till he meets my eyes and then I round on Edward. I am pissed off that he has come in here tromping on Jasper.

"You are a real piece of work you know that you come here into your parents home and disrespect them and try to inflict as much damage as possible to anyone around you. You don't know me you have seen me one time before tonight yet you spit words like whore, slut, rich girl etc. But guess what I don't care you mean nothing to me but your family is amazing and they don't deserve your bullshit. The next time you piss Jasper off like this though I wont stop him but I will help him hide the body. You don't have to be so jealous Edward if you weren't such a prick maybe you would have a woman too." I say to Edward I am nose to nose with him then I turn to Jasper and his parents.

" I am sorry I mean no disrespect to you or your home." I say and I grab my phone and walk outside. I jump up on the tailgate and call my mom. I am shaking I am so angry.

"Hey Belly whats going on?" My mom answers the phone I can hear the smile in her voice. I smile reactively I miss my parents having Jaspers around actually make me miss mine more.

"Hey mom I am okay I feel like shit but I'm okay. I have to ask you something but I need to say it all before you answer." I tell her sighing knowing that I am just calling to word vomit but Rose isn't in the best place and I need a sounding board.

"I am sorry your dad and I can't be there belly. I know you are sick and of course baby you can ask me anything." My moms voice comes through the phone soft and sweet like always.

" I don't know what to do mom. I am here with Jasper and his family and this feels like home being here with him. He takes such good care of me and I love him. Like earth shattering love like you and dad have. He wants me to leave New York and come live here with him. I don't know what to do my heart says go with him but my brain says to be realistic and keep my focus on my career." I tell her and it feels good to say the words out loud it gives them life. I know what I want to do but I don't know if I should be making life changing decisions after such a scare.

"You answered your own question Bella. Can you see yourself without him? What does that life look like? If you can't see that life or live with it then you know what to do. That's how true love happens baby girl it hits you over the head and twists up. Every thought you had about what you thought life would be. You know I wanted to move somewhere sunny and be an artist and then I met your dad and I knew I couldn't live anywhere he wasn't so here I am living in dreary Washington blissfully happy with the man I love." She says and I am in tears because I already know the answer she is right I can't be without him. How could I ever love anyone else the way I love Jasper.

"Thank you mom I just needed to talk it out I guess.I do love him I guess I am moving to Texas." I tell her turning when I hear the screen door slam. Jasper is coming toward me quickly.

"Don't wait to long to tell that boy how much you love him. Because he is showing you he loves you in spades baby girl." Mom says in my ear as Jasper reaches me and steps between my legs. I smile at his closeness I have never been a needy woman but I need his touch.

"I won't mom I love you tell dad I am fine and I love him too." I say into the phone hoping she gets that my man is here.

"We know your fine Jasper and your dad talk. But I love you too and don't be a stranger." She says and hangs up. I look up at Jasper and I see the anger behind his eyes and I wonder if it is directed at me or his shit head brother. He leans down and presses his lips to mine once, twice and then three times making me giggle at the silliness he smiles at me too. I wrap my arms around him and hug him to me.

"I love you Jasper." I say quietly with my lips a whisper from his and I kiss him again. My mind is made up I will call James tomorrow and tell him I will be moving to Texas. Jasper grabs my face and kisses me harder.

"I have know that you do baby and I love you too. If you're not ready to be here for good then we will go back to New York and visit it again later." Jasper says grabbing my hands and pulling me from the tailgate and shutting it.

"I want to take you home baby I think we have had enough for today." He says kissing my forehead. We stand in silence for a beat I am just enjoying the feeling of his body against mine.

"Let's go say bye to your parents." I tell him grabbing his hand and walking back towards the house. I stop short at the sounds coming from the house.

"You are done Edward you need help and if you're not willing get help then we are done. Jasper is moving home and taking over the ranch. This has to end Edward you are going to kill yourself with the crap that you put into your body." I can hear the yell of Sherman from the porch. This isn't my business I have already stuck my nose in it enough. Jasper looks shocked and we turn from the door. Going home away from the crazy that is currently taking place in the Whitlock house.

"I fucking hate this Jasper I hate it so much." I am sitting in the bottom of the shower crying as my hair starts falling out more than normal and I knew that this could happen but I was in denial. Jasper sits down behind me on the shower floor wrapping me up in his arms and just holding me this is not the first breakdown I have had in the last three weeks. My first week of chemo and I was a little sick but fine. Week two and my muscles hurt so bad I could barely move, my head hurt so bad I was throwing up. Jasper took me to the hospital then and I cried the whole time we were there and Jasper flipped out on a set of nurses because they weren't helping.

"It feels shitty when your body turns against you." I tell him I am in tears I hurt everywhere. I hate being weak this is not me I don't want to be sick anymore.

"Come on lets go to bed baby I will hold you." He tells me and we stand up he turns off the water. His hold on me never waivers it is strong and he holds me against him like he always has.

"Will you still want me after this?" I ask Jasper while we are in bed he is rubbing my back. He grabs my chin and pulls it up to look at him. He looks tired we have spent a lot of time at home hanging out I jog on good days but I miss living.

"I have wanted you since the moment you walked into the shop. I will want you for as long as I have a breath in my body." He tells me and kisses me softly and when he pulls back I lean up and press my lips into his neck.

" I want to stay here with you. I made up my mind I don't want to live without you and if that means moving to Texas lets do can figure out the when where and how later. I already called James and told him. He laughed and told me you knew what you had." I tell him with my lips against his ear.

"I want you to marry me. I want us to live in this house together as man and wife. I am not saying today or tomorrow but I do want you to be my wife." He tells me after he flipped me over on my back pinning me under him. His body is hard in all the right places and having him on top of me after my massive breakdown in the shower is overwhelming.

"You better ask my dad first or he will shoot you." I tell him running my hand across his beard and tugging a little of the end. Watching his face and his body twitch is hot.

"Already done baby when you were in the hospital. I almost lost you and I realized I couldn't imagine living without you." He says and reaches over to the nightstand and pulls out a simple white gold solitaire ring.

"So would you be willing to marry a tattooed cowboy and spend your life with me on this big ole ranch? Make me the happiest and proudest man in the country by one day becoming my wife?" Jasper slides off the bed and on to his knees holding the ring out for me.

"Yes, Jasper it would be an honor to marry such an amazing man. I would love nothing more than to be your wife and spend everyday on this ranch with you." I tell him and he slips the ring on my finger and kisses me. His lips against mine feel different this time somehow.

"We need to get in bed baby we have an early morning tomorrow." He says sliding in the bed turning me over on my side and spooning me.

"What do we have tomorrow?" I ask feeling more content than I ever have wrapped up in Jaspers arms.

"Someone is going to need to tell my parents that we are getting married and my pop leaves for the animals damned early." He says resting his face in my neck. I lay my head over his heart and throw my legs over his. Jasper holds me tight.

"I love you Isabella you have made me the happiest I have even been. You being sick is just a hurdle baby one that we are going to clear."

"I love you too Jasper and with you here I am going to be fine." I fall asleep in the arms of the most amazing man I have ever known and I know that staying here with him and being apart of his life here is what I want to do. This is it.


	9. Good Graces

"What the fuck is all that racket?" Jasper groans from beside me.

"I don't know but can we make it stop please." I say praying that the noise dies soon because my head hurts.

Bang bang bang.

"Jasper Bella please answer the door." I hear a male voice call from the door. Jasper sits up and I poke my head out from under the blankets. It's still dark out I roll towards Jasper.

"It's to early for this shit." Jasper grumbles and gets out of bed. I swing my legs over the bed and follow Jasper out of the room after grabbing my robe. I am sure that its Edward but I'm tired and hurting this morning I don't really want to deal with his brother at all.

"Edward why are you here? We have breakfast with mom and pop in a few hours can't you just fuck off till then." Jasper yanks opens the door and says. Edwards face falls immediately. I put my hand out and grab Jaspers arm and pull him back a little Edward looks up at me.

"Edward come on in since we are all awake I will get some coffee." Edwards eyes widen and he looks at Jasper who steps back from the door allowing Edward in. The brothers are in a deadlock staring at one another. I decide to break the silence.

"No need for coffee Bella thank you but I won't keep y'all long. I just came to say that I am sorry to both of you. I have been nothing but rude to you Bella and what you said last night was 100% correct I don't know you. I am leaving now to go to rehab I have to get help I can't do it alone. I hope to see you both when I get back." He says and goes to walk out but Jasper grabs his arm and pulls him into a hug. It takes Edward a minute to recover and hug him back.

"I love you brother get some help and come home we will be here. I asked Bella to marry me last night and she said yes we're going to tell mom and pop this morning." Jasper says to him pulling back. Looking at his brother I can see the trepidation in Jaspers expression.

"Congratulations to you both I am glad your happy Jasper and you too Bella. Keep her because if this shit doesn't drive her off then nothing will. I will see y'all in a few months." Edward says looking between and smiling. He turns and walks out the door with nothing else to say. Jasper follows him to the door and locks it behind him. Jasper puts his head against the door and lets out a heavy sigh.

"Today has already been interesting hasn't it baby. Lets get back in bed for a little while." Jasper says and takes my hand pulling me back to the bedroom.

"I am not tired anymore." I tell Jasper and take of my robe and drop it to the floor. Jasper looks up and I see his eye dilate as I pull my shirt over my head slowly because if I move to fast it will hurt.

"Don't tease me baby it is not nice I haven't been inside of you in almost 2 months and I don't want to hurt you." Jasper tells me and his voice is gruff. I push my shorts and panties down off my hips and kick them off at the end.

"I had no plans on teasing you Jasper I would like the man who asked me to marry him tonight to take what he would like to be his for his own." I tell him and climb up the bed on all fours.

"How could I ever turn you down baby?" Jasper says grabbing my hips and flipping us over so that he is on top of me.

"Don't treat me like glass Jasper show me how much you have missed me that is what I need next time can be soft and sweet." I tell him leaning up and biting his bottom lip causing him to groan and grab my head kissing me until I am sure my lips will be bruised. I kiss him back with just as much fervor. Jasper pulls back from me and pushes his boxers down and leans over to the night stand where he produced my ring from and grabs a condom and I lift an eyebrow.

"You haven't been on birth control since your fall baby and as much I would love nothing more than babies with you lets get you health and married first." He tells me smirking and sliding the condom on his hard cock. I swoon just a little at the mention of babies and marriage I didn't know I wanted this life until I looked at it this way. Jasper slides his finger into me and I moan at the intrusion because everything with him feels so right.

"I hope your ready baby because you are so wet for me." He groans and slips his fingers out of me and slides his cock into me hard and fast and I scream out and he stops looking down at me.

"Oh god Jasper don't fucking stop now." I say to him pushing my heels into his ass and dragging my nails down his shoulders. He leans down pressing his body on top of me and biting my ear. He pulls out and slams back into me.

"You are mine Isabella Swan all mine." He says speeding up his strokes and pants in my ear while I murmur nonsense because really my brain is a bit scrambled by the sensation.

"I need you to come baby I can't hold on you feel to good." He groans in my ear and bottoms out inside me and grinds his pelvis against my clit making me yell out. The shock radiates through my body and I climb higher towards an orgasm.

"If you keep that up I will be done long before it feels so fucking good." I tell him in a whisper because I can't summon enough breath to talk very loud.

"You feel fucking amazing baby I have missed you." He says looking my eyes grinding against me again I throw my head back and moan. The spasm begins and I know it wont take much more for me to shatter,

"Look at me I want to watch you come apart." He tells me holding my chin and looking directly on my eyes. I feel the tightening deep in my belly and Jasper can feel it to because he leans down and kissed me slow and deep he bites my lip and slams into me at the same time. I struggle to keep my eyes open as my entire body seizes as the orgasm floods all of my senses.

"Yes, baby yea thats it baby." He says fucking his face against my neck and biting the space between my neck and shoulder. I can feel him jerk inside me and stiffen above me. We both are panting and I am shaking was he wraps his arms around me and he turns us to our sides and holds me against his chest.

"Baby its time to get up we need to get going." Jasper is touching my face and I can feel the warmth of his breath across my cheek.

"No, we don't I feel good right here." I mumble against his chest. I am perfectly warm, naked still tucked snuggly into Jaspers side his arm around me. He chuckles below me and starts funning his hand up and down from the top of my ass to my neck. My nipples harden and I moan because it feels good.

"If you want me to get up then I suggest you stop that or we will not make it out of the bed today." I tell Jasper running my hand down his chest. I get another chuckle from Jasper as he snatches my hand and kisses my palm.

"I think your mom is going to lose her shit." I tell Jasper in the truck the way over to his parents. We did get out of bed but decided on going at lunch time since we didn't get put of bed until ten. Yesterday was a crazy day for us a lot happened but everything for us has been very fast whether it was good or bad. So I am going to live for the now and hope fro the best. I know that Jasper will do his best for me and I will do the same.

"Momma, pop we went home last night and I asked Bella if she would be my wife and she said yes." He tells his parents and I lift my left hand to show them the beautiful ring on it. The scream that follows is almost deafening and Jaspers mom is up and has her arms around both before I know what has happened.

"Welcome to the family darlin I have prayed for a great woman to come into my son life and love him and god has given us just that a woman to love my youngest son." She kisses me on the cheek and holds my face. I smile at her I am a lucky gal I don't think that I could have gotten any luckier that to marry into the amazing family. We stay for lunch and momma makes Monte Cristo's and homemade fries. They look amazing and smell even better Jaspers dad doesn't want to go back to work but we need to leave soon Jasper has time in a local shop and appointments.

"Bella why don't you stay we can go out shopping today get some things for y'alls place make it more homely." Jaspers mom says to me when we talk about leaving. He looks over at me raising his eyebrow I smile at him because I get a wild hair. His and I sexcepades this morning has made me feel a little more like myself.

"Only if you promise me that you will show me the naked baby pictures." I tell her looking right at Jasper and he flushes. I chuckle as do his parents. Jasper has a shit eating grin on his face and I imagine I do too.

"That my darling girl we can do let the men get off and we will head to Austin there is an amazing store I want to take you to." She tells me patting my leg and kissing Jaspers cheek.

"Let me shove off then I have work lined up." He looks toward me and nods toward the door. I stand and take his hand following him outside.

"I love you baby I will call you when I am on my way back enjoy your time with my mom she can be a handful sometimes but she loves you." He says pulling me into him and kissing the daylights out of me. He pulls back and I groan and I am holding onto his shirt and we are body to body.

"I love you too and I love your mom she is great we are going to fill your house with all kinds of odd girly shit. Have fun at work babe I know you have been missing tattooing. " I tell him kissing his lips again and pulling back. We have been together so much since we have been here that knowing he is leaving leaves me a little sad. Its good for us to spend some time apart as well.

"Be safe baby and buy whatever you want for our house you live there too." He says and picks my hand up and kisses my ring finger and then my lips. Hopping up on the truck and when he starts it I walk back in the house. This man make me so damned happy it is ridiculous.

"What about this? I think it would look good in the living room." I ask momma about a canvas with a beautiful set of poppies on it. I could paint the same myself but the point of this is to decorate and have fun.

"It matches the tattoo on your shoulder." She says smiling at me and I nod putting it in our cart Ikea is always fun we are about halfway through the store and I have about three quarters of a cart full.

"Have you been looking at some of the galleries in the areas for jobs? I know that you are giving up a lot moving here. But I can't say that I am not incredibly happy that you are going to be here. I have been the only woman in the family for along time." Momma tells me and I smile at her genuinely. She is the sweetest woman but she raised to boys and lived on a ranch I know she probably has a very sharp side.

"I think that I may talk to some galleries about getting some of my art in for now. So much has changed so quickly that I think I want some time to adjust to a new normal. Not everyone works a nine to five and I want that for a while at least." I tell her as we walk toward the check out.I have plenty saved for now that I can focus on healing. i hope that she doesn't feel like I am taking advantage of her son.

"Oh honey you need to get all better before you worry about really. Jasper wouldn't care if you stayed home and did nothing. Do you think you would like to help Jasper on the ranch?" She asks me and pick up a chocolate bar at the check out.

"I would like to see what goes into it yes but I am by no means a cowgirl but I think that if I can help I will." I tell her piling my finds on the belt. I have never been the outdoorsy type aside from running through the park.

"You will find your niche on the ranch. I grew up in a society home and my parents told me I was ruining my life when I married a ranch owners son who would never give me what I deserved. But he did he gave me children that I didn't know I wanted and a full life that I wouldn't trade for anything. We had bad years but we never went hungry or without the necessities. What more could I ask for than a man who loved me like I was the world and two healthy children." She tells me tearing up slightly at the end and it makes me hug her tightly. My parents aren't outwardly lovers and I don't mean they aren't unkind but you wouldn't hear either of them declare their love openly like this for me or each other. I spend a lot of money at Ikea and Jasper calls me in-between clients just to tell me he loves me which of course makes me swoon more for him if that is even possible.

"When are we going back to New York? I mean there are things to get done." I ask Jasper as we lay in bed wrapped in the sheets he is running his hand down my hair. He grunts and I smack his stomach and he laughs grabbing my hand and bites my palm making me moan.

"Your final appointment is in a few days and I thought we could fly out maybe this weekend. Then we can pack, deal with the house and drive back." Jasper tells me pulling me on top of him. There is no time in the day that don't want him and really moving here away from the fast pace of New York. I am looking forward to more time with Jasper and learning the lay of this beautiful land.

"Sounds like a solid plan although that might be a very long drive." I tell Jasper sitting astride him and slide deftly down on his hard cock. Jasper reaches up gripping my hips pulling me down and grinding me down on him. I throw my head back and grab his hands digging my nails in at the feel of him.

"Fuck me baby that feel so good." He grinds out between pants I lean forward where we are chest to chest and I seal my lips over his and pick my hips up enough that just the tip is still inside me and slam back down making him and I both scream out.

"Get up or I am going to cum inside you baby you feel to good." Jasper says his hands grabbing my ass I slowly pull off of him and slide down his body. Wrapping my hand around him pulling from root to tip. He sits up and puts his hand over mine as I lick the tip of his cock. This is something I have never done with anyone else. He runs his hands along my face and into my hair gripping it at the root and groans loudly as I take his cock all the way into my mouth.

"I won't last long baby your mouth feels amazing." He says and I look up at him and he has fire in his eyes as he watches me suck him off. He takes control of my movements holding my head still while he lifts his hips. It feels good for me to as he gets himself off with my mouth it is the single most erotic thing I have ever experienced. Jasper stops suddenly and lets out a cry and jerks in my mouth I don't care for the taste but I swallow what I can. Jasper grabs my shoulders and pulls me up to him and rubs his cum over my lips with his thumb and then kisses me making me moan. He tilts my chin up and kisses down the side of my neck, across my collarbone and between my breasts. Pulling me against him and then underneath him in one simple move he lays me on my back and with both hands presses my breasts together and bites my nipples then kissing them softly and licking. I am wet and so horny that I lift my hips to grind myself against him just for some friction. Jasper chuckles as he holds both breasts kneading them and kissing down my stomach.

"Don't tease me babe I didn't tease you." I tell him my voice catching and his lips reach the top of my slit and he takes a languid lick of me forcing another deep groan from me. Jasper alternates between running his tongue in me and then his finger. He has his forearm against my hips holding me down as I writhe for him when he slides his fingers deep inside me I explode into a million pieces. He keeps his fingers inside me until the pulsating stops. I don't register that Jasper has moved us to lay spooned together. He is wrapped around me his face tucked into my neck.

"I can't believe sometimes that you are willing to be mine from now on. I don't think I will ever be as happy as I am when I am here with you." Jasper says against my neck. I turn in his arms my body is as relaxed as it can get and I am blissfully happy.

"I look at you and your family and wonder why you chose me to come live this sweet life with you." I tell him and kiss him hoping that some of the emotion I feel into the feeling of his lips against mine. I love him more than I thought was possible. I fall asleep almost instantly wrapped up in Jasper like I do most nights.

"Come on beautiful lets get you fed." Jaspers warm palms run on my back and kisses my cheek.

"Mmmm okay I am up handsome I am up." I tell him peaking out at his handsome face next to mine I sit up a little and kiss his lips we are packed up here and we will start our drive to New York after my appointment.

"We have to stop baby or we will not leave the bed and I am already dressed there is coffee and a bagel waiting for you." He kisses my cheek again pulling the sheet off of me and slapping my ass hard enough to make me jump. Damn him and his wicked ways.


	10. Messy is different for everyone

AN:This is the longest chapter yet. I have been going through and editing and tweaking as I go. I hope you like this chapter it's a hot one and feels one. If you know anyone who could be suicidal please get them help most first responder services can help. If you need to talk to someone the national suicide hotline number is 1-800-273-8255 and this is there website.

Thank you as always for reading I appreciate all of the reviews, follows, and favs.

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

" this way please ." The nurse calls from the door I have already had a scan and now we are heading back to talk to the doctor Jasper is holding my hand as we walk back and he is smiling down at me. He always looks for all the good in everything as I am a pessimist by nature. I am shaking when we sit in the exam room waiting for the doctor.

"Whatever he says doesn't matter baby we will get through anything that comes our way together." Jasper says holding my clasped hands to his lips and I nod in understanding but I can't agree because I don't want to damn him to a sick wife.

"Your scans look great Bella. I am concerned a little about your blood work still. I would like for you to do one more round and see you back in a month." He tells me handing me an appointment slip and shaking Jaspers hand and then mine. I am a little taken a back by a second round of chemo but this is the doctors job and I will do what he wants. I am silent on when we get in the car if I open my mouth I may puke or cry.

"When do you want to get married baby?" Jasper asks while he holding my hand in the car we just got on 35heading toward the house. Jasper means well and I want to marry him and I would do it tomorrow if I could.

"I think a Christmas wedding could be a lot of fun." I tell him looking at him smiling I don't want to wait I don't know why people have long engagements really if you are sure enough to say yes then go on with it.

"Christmas huh I think we can all that off baby. Let's have a Christmas wedding." Jasper says to me. We drive home hand in hand I will make cancer my bitch.

The trip to New York is uneventful arriving in New York is surreal actually, where Texas was wide open New York is stacked up and chaotic. I am really ready to make this move it seems like the right thing to do. But New York has been good to me and I will miss many parts of this city but this is a needed change I love him and that is what I need is someone to hold me while I cry.

"Jasper, What about these are they going with us or are you donating them?" I say patting the old leather couches that are in the living room. The flight was easy but I came home and crashed out exhausted I got my chemo treatment day before yesterday and it hit me today.

"I think that we should donate them they are to old and we have nice furniture already in the house." Jasper says grabbing the books off the shelf and into boxes. I join him at the shelf filling another box. Packing is boring but we are doing it together. My stuff for the most part is still in boxes so that will be easy to move.

"To Isabella Swan who is forsaking us and our beautiful city follow this man to Texas. I have to say though if Garrett asked me to move to Texas I would. Love is love and you two have it." James says holding his drink up at our favorite pub in midtown. Jasper stands beside me holding around my waist.

"I can't believe your leaving us Jasper but you look happier already. We knew that eventually you would go home." Alice says patting him on the shoulder and smiling at me.

"Take care of him." She says to me turning with a lifted eyebrow and nod at her smiling. She pats my shoulder and walks away to chatter with other people.

"I guess I will be making a trip to Texas soon then won't I." Tanya says saddling up next to me bumping me with her hip. She looks beautiful as always standing there smiling at me.

"Yep I will need you there for our wedding at Christmas. I want you to be a bridesmaid." I tell her and she squeals hugging me. We spend the night with our friends a few of Jaspers clients come and some of mine from the gallery overall it's a good night.

"I fly to Washington on Friday I am going to see Rose I miss her." Emmett says as we are sitting in our booth after everyone has left.

"Awe Emmet that is sweet. I need to start looking for flights for Thanksgiving. I haven't been home for the holidays in years." I say off handedly. Jasper squeezes my knee under the table. I look at him and smile a little knowing we haven't discussed it but it needs to happen.

"Jasper man I hope you don't take this the wrong way but I never saw you settling down and getting married. You look fucking happy I hope that the two of you make it. Give the rest of us messed up guys know that there is a life with PTSD." Emmett says smirking at him. I can see that Emmett is serious and it makes my heart clinch for him.

"If you would have told me a year ago that this is where I would be, with a beautiful woman who is willing to deal with my crazy for the rest of her life. I would have told you that you were full of shit. But I am a blessed man I couldn't have predicted this but I am thankful as hell for it." He says wrapping his arm around my shoulder and kissing me. I smile at him because I agree 100 percent this wasn't what I ever thought that my life would be but I wouldn't change it for anything.

"I am happy for you brother after everything that you have been through you deserve a woman who will be good and loyal to you. She has already proved that she just wants you." He says clinking his beer with Jaspers. I wonder then who was the girl who scorned him and make a mental note to ask him. We haven't really had the ex's talk for me it is pretty unnecessary I have only ever been in one real relationship and it was not really very serious. We stay at the bar till they close and say goodnight to Emmet. We go to the hotel room that we have booked for tonight and tomorrow night as the house is all packed up and most of the furniture given away.

"Are you sad to be leaving New York?" Jasper asks me as we walk down the sidewalk. I love the walkability of New York and I will defiantly miss that but the trade of wide open spaces is worth it.

"As long as you're leaving with me what is there to be sad about." I say to him bumping into him and smiling because I would follow him anywhere in the world.

"Touché but it is a little bittersweet life will be very different on the ranch which wont be full time for me for a while. I have a spot at the shop I worked at some while we were there." Jasper says stepping off the street into and alcove and pulling me into him. I sigh at him because the feeling of him against me is so comforting.

"That is good because I have a sketch drew up that I want tattooed after I have my next follow up." I tell him a little giddy because I am a little addicted to the tattoos obviously. Once I am all healed I will get a new piece. He leans down and presses his lips against mine licking and biting my bottom lip making me moan.

"It will be my pleasure baby." He says kissing me as he pulls us back out onto the street and towards our hotel.

"I can't believe where we both are. You're in Texas with Jasper and his family and I am back in Seattle working for daddy. It was great to have Emmett here I was sad for him to leave. At least I will see him at your place at Christmas." Rose says on FaceTime she looks good. She has been in counseling for months and is living in the Seattle alone. I worry about her but her family will take good care of her and I am always just a phone call away.

"I am glad that he came to see you. Both of you deserve to be happy. You look good did you see the maid of honor dress I sent to you? I need you to go to the shop and get fitted for it." I tell her matter of factly. I am baking a cheesecake for Jasper he has been at the ranch since before the sun came up and I want to do something nice for him. The man has a crazy sweet tooth so this is the least I can do he has been so great since we got back from New York.

"I will you nag. I have an appointment tomorrow at lunch. Who knew that my idea to go get tattoos would change both of our lives so drastically. You and all your anti boyfriend crap are getting hitched.I hope that he knows what a lucky man he is. You are looking good as well looks like you have gained some of your weight back." Rose says as she piddles in her house I roll my eyes because Jaspers mom has made a point of making sure I am fed and often. I was happy when my hair didn't all fall out but I did cut it shorter so that it wouldn't be so heavy for a while. Chemo for me this round wasn't as harsh my body took to it much better.

"I don't now how I am gaining weight it is hot as balls down here. I thought New York got muggy but this heat down here is something. I can see why southerners complain about it." I say laughing because it is true we have been back three weeks it's the end of July and just keeps getting hotter.

"I found a church to get married at though which is nice and I also got my studio set up today which will be good." I tell her and perk up hearing Jaspers pickup pull up.

"Hey Rose Jasper just pulled up I will call you tomorrow. I love you." I say to her as the front door opens. I don't really care to rush her off the phone but Jasper has been gone since the ass crack of dawn and I need some time with my man.

"Hey baby, hey Rose." Jasper says kissing my head then he walks by me going toward the bedroom. I check out his ass that happens to be clad in jeans. He looks delicious the longer we are here the more bronzed his skin gets,

"Love you too he looks delicious go for it babe talk to you later." Rose says and presses end and the buzzer on the oven dings. I hear the shower come on about the time I get to the bedroom door after taking the cake out and turning off the oven.

"Mind if I join you." I ask Jasper pulling the shower door he is standing with his hands against the far wall with his head down and the water running down his back I can see his exit wound from his gun shot wound and the names of comrades that he lost in war on his back he doesn't lift his head but answers me.

"That is a rhetorical question right baby. You are always welcome in the shower with me." He says to me. So I climb in the shower and wrap my arms around him from behind and lay my cheek on his back his breathing is even and heavy I know something has happened he is struggling but I know better than to push him so I offer my comfort by just holding him skin to skin. I press my lips to his skin.

"I love you." I tell Jasper in a low voice he moves one hand from the wall grabbing my hands in his. I know that this is his way of answering me with no words. We stand in the shower until he is ready to move he is mine and I will hold him up as long as he needs. He finally pushes off the wall and turns to me grabbing my face with his hands I cringe a little at the heat in them I didn't realize my face was that cold. Jasper stops when he sees me cringe.

"I would never hurt you baby I hope you know that. I have fucked up days where my head is scrambled but you are my happy place. I love you baby lets get washed and get out of here before you freeze. I can't marry a popsicle now can I." Jasper says pecking me and we take turns washing each other soft caresses that say everything that we need.

"I know you wouldn't you skin was hot is all. I made you a cheesecake and dinner but cheesecake is important." I tell Jasper as I slide my pajama shorts on. He reaches over and pinches my ass making me squeal and him laugh. He can turn from being serious to playful so quickly that he makes my head spin.

"How did you know that I would need this today? You are perfect." He says kissing my lips and grabbing my hand waking us both toward the kitchen. Dinner and dessert are both fantastic and we grab beers and head toward the has become a habit for us the porch is comfortable and its warm out with a nice breeze you can hear frogs and crickets. Jasper sits in one of the rockers and pats his lap when I go for the swing and I raise an eyebrow at him.

"Come on baby don't fight me I just want to hold you tonight." Jasper tells me reaching his hand out for me. So I take it and sit down on his lap as he wraps his arm around my hips and I drape my arm around his shoulders. We have found deep comfort in one another. We bicker but for the most part we get along and these quiet moments are perfect.

"I know that I have said this in passing before. But I never thought that this would happen for me you know. You do so many messed up things as a young person and think that all that bad shit you put out there will prevent you from ever getting a slice of heaven. But somehow God saw some redemption in me and he gave me you. I got a call from a buddy today that lives in the area he and I were in Iraq together, so I went to see him he sounded off when I talked to him he was trying to apologize for things that happened over seas. I called the cops to send them to his address. I have had calls like this before they are cries for help. By the time I got to his house there was an ambulance, firetruck and 3 cop cars. I knew it was bad news as soon as I received the call but I didn't know how bad. Bella he killed his pregnant wife and them himself." Jasper has tears running down his face and he has his arms so tightly around me it almost hurts. I squeeze him back and bury my face in his neck. It's all of the comfort I know how to provide without saying anything because if I open my mouth right now I will be hysterical my heart is broken for him and for the man and his wife. I like most Americans know that the soldiers coming home from war are struggling in everyday life they don't come home and heal right. But I have never been this close the strong man who I would give my life for is broken and I don't know what to do.

"You did the right thing babe everything you could have done for him." I tell him bringing his face up to meet mine and I kiss his lips and wipe the tears off of his face I scoot down some and tuck myself against his chest.I hold him while he shakes it is all I can do try to hold him up so he can fall apart. We don't say anything else. After sometime we both relax into one another and I wake up when Jasper lays me in the bed.

"Go back to sleep baby I will be in later." Jasper says and his eyes are red rimmed. I don't want him to leave this part of him scares me. Like a lot of people who suffer from PTSD Jasper can be reclusive in times of need pull away and that can be deadly.

"Don't leave me Jasper please get in bed with me." I tell him grabbing his hand. I don't know what else to do but hold on to him.

"I am fine Bella just go to sleep." Jasper says and his voice is flat it scares me before I realize it I have tears streaming down my face. I jerk my hand away and turn onto my side I am angry that he is shutting me out but more than that I am afraid of what he will do if he leaves. The bed behind me dips slightly and I feel him curl into me.

"Don't cry baby please I am just fucked up right now I don't know how to be with you when my mind is so scrambled. I won't be able to live with myself if I do something like what Crosby did. I fucking love you more that anything on the planet and I would never want to hurt you." Jasper says with his lips so close to my ear that his breath slides across my face. I shake my head at him even though its dark. I don't want to be angry but this man wants forever with me but doesn't trust me with this.

"You can't just shut me out. I know that you have demons Jasper and I get that and not talking to me is okay I can understand not wanting to put your demons on display but you can't just set me aside like a toy that you don't want. That hurts a lot I love you and I will be whatever you need me to be babe but I won't be tossed aside by the one person who can hurt me to the bone." I tell him not even opening my eyes. I cant look at him we both have faults and I know that I cant just let this go though.

"I never want to hurt you ever. I am sorry baby let me hold you please." Jasper asks and I nod but turn into him and hold him back I want him to know that I want to hold him too. I lay awake long after Jaspers breath evens out I cry silently for a while because my heart hurts for Jasper and the family that lost 3 souls today.

The next few days feel off Jasper and I both tread carefully around one another. I paint a lot and spend some time with his mom. Jasper is working at the shop in town a few days a week and then at the ranch other days. I applied at the gallery that I found and heard back today that I have the job part time if I want it so when Jasper gets back today we will have to talk about that. I also booked a ticket to go home this weekend just for three days but I want to find a wedding dress and I can't do that without my mom. Jasper may not be happy but I think that the time apart will good for us.

 _J - Mom wants to have dinner in the city tonight. 7:30 I can be home about 6 / 6:30._

 _B - Where are we going?_

 _J - A steakhouse that my parents have been going to since I was a kid._

 _B - K is it fancy or jeans and a t-shirt?_

 _J - Sunday best is what we go in._

 _B - Sounds good see you when you get home. I love you be careful._

 _J - I love you too baby._

I decide that I will dress up tonight I spend time on my hair and a summer dress that you could wear to church but my under garments make it sexy. Even though me and Jasper are in an awkward spot I want him to be hard all night. Jasper comes in as I am finishing up my make up. I am leaning against the counter on my tip toes when I hear Jasper come in the room.

"You look beautiful baby how about we stay in and I will eat you." Jasper says kissing the spot behind my ear that makes my nipples harden every time. He smirks as we look at each other in the mirror and his eyes are looking at my hard nipples through the light material of my dress. Jasper runs his hands up my thighs and under my dress finding my ass bare. He growls at me and slaps my cheek lightly making me moan.

"No panties to go to dinner with my parents huh. How about I make you cum before we walk out this door." He groans in my ear pulling my dress up so we can both see the little white thong I have on. He smirks at me in the mirror.

"We will be late Jasper." I say my voice is already tight with need I am wet already for him. I don't sound convincing at all I want to cum and he has barely even touched me.

"I don't fucking care I want to make you cum now baby." Jasper says sliding his fingers down the front of the scrap of lace. Running a fingers between my lips and teasing my opening. I groan at him when his palm is on my clit. He chuckles at doing it again just to hear me moan.

"Tell me you want to cum before we go to dinner baby. You want me inside of you don't you Isabella. You can have that to night but for now you will have to take my fingers. You want to cum on my fingers don't you." He says sliding a finger in about an inch and pulling it back out and rubbing the wetness across my clit making me suck in a breath.

"Yes, fuck Jasper please don't tease me." I say more out of breath than I really should be. He shakes his head at me and lifts his eyebrow. He pulls his hand out of my panties and slips his finger in his mouth moaning and I moan watching him in the mirror. I really want him to fuck me hard right here but he is playing a game.

"Tell me what you want baby." Jasper says and then kisses me hard on the lips. I moan and push my tongue in his mouth. I can taste myself mixed with him and it is intoxicating.

"Make me cum Jasper please I need you to make me cum." I moan against his lips and tread my fingers in his hair. He growls biting my lip and pulling back.

"Watch me baby." He says looking at me in the mirror my eyes are dilated, cheeks flushed, nipples hard. I watch Jaspers hand pull my dress up and hold it in his other hand. His hand pushes in my thong and presses his fingers against my hard clit.

"Fuck you look sexy baby. Your pussy wants it so bad I wish I had time to lick you clean and fuck you hard but this will have to do for now." He whispers in my ear looking in my eyes in the mirror. His fingers travel down further to my opening and he pushes two fingers in me. My knees go weak and I close my eyes.

"Open your eyes now or I will stop." He growls in my ear pushing his fingers further in me. I do as I am told and open my eyes Jasper grinds his hard cock against my naked ass and starts pumping his fingers. The whole scene is erotic and it won't take much to make me cum and Jasper knows my body so well. He presses hard with his palm on my clit and curls his fingers inside of me. Making me scream out.

"Cum for me baby before I cum in my pants." He bites down on my ear lobe and pushes a third finger in me. I explode around him my legs turning to mush and black spots appearing in my vision. I slump forward holding myself up. When I look up Jasper is looking right at me.

"You are so fucking beautiful. This will have to do for now were already late. But I will be buried deep later tonight," Jasper tells me as he holds me around my waist I look disheveled when I look in the mirror. His works make my pussy clinch and my skin heat. But the look Jasper has on his face does more for me than his words.


	11. Love isn't meant to be lost

AN: Thank you all for reading as always I appreciate all the words y'all have for my story. I am tweaking as I go and I thought that I had it all written but I don't think so. I really think it has just begun but we will see yeah. Love, peace, and chicken grease folks.

"Sorry we're late momma you can blame me I got a little caught up." Jasper says kissing his moms cheeks and hugging his dad while I do the same after him. We are only about 20 minutes late thanks to the fact that Jasper drives like a mad man.

"Oh sweet boy I wasn't going to blame Bella. So you were the likely choice dear. You look lovely Bella this dress flatters you. Our table just got ready anyway so no harm done son. " Momma says touching the skirt and smiling at me. Jasper's parents are incredibly affectionate but the months of being here have let me grow accustom to the attention. Jasper wraps his arm around me and we follow his parents into the dining room. The restaurant is nice low lighting, china on the tables, and red table cloths. Jasper pulls my chair out and waits for me to sit before pushing it back in for me dropping a kiss to my shoulder. He walks to his own chair waiting for his father to sit before he does. Man the chivalry runs deep in this family. After looking at the menu Jasper and I agree on the chef's table for two and an add-on of asparagus. I tell him to get me a glass of prosecco as well. I like when he orders for he commands attention it's hot.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I hear a female voice that makes Jasper stiffen and momma's face pale. I look up to see a beautiful dark haired girl with olive skin and glasses. Her name badge says Angela and her face says hatred. She lifts an eyebrow as if she is expecting an answer.

"I need to use the restroom excuse me." I go to stand up and both men stand as well and I blush. This is not something I am used to either. I am not a woman to back down but I am also not jealous I have Jasper's love and he will explain when he is ready.

"Wait for me darlin I would like to powder my nose." Momma says and stands as well. We walk toward the back of the restaurant. She is leading me because I don't know where I am going. I don't look back although it is tempting.

"Give him a chance to explain okay Bella." Momma says looking at me in the mirror she looks upset and I know right then that whoever that woman is will upset our lives and I just wanted some peace. I nod at momma and touch up my lipstick I have a feeling that I will need the war paint. We walk back out into the dining room and I hold my head up high.

"Angela I just moved back I didn't know you were here anymore. You don't get to treat me like I did something to you because I didn't do anything wrong. That was you please send us a new waitress." I hear Jasper saying as we approach the table. Angela looks at him as though he has stood up and slapped her but I know better. He stands and pulls my chair out for me. Kissing my cheek and making a smile break out on my face.

"He can't love anyone you should know that he will be with you and make you love him and leave you broken in the end." Angela says looking right at me with tears in her eyes. I look at her head on I don't take well to being told about what my man or cant do.

"I think we asked for a new waitress Angela. But thank you for your unneeded advice." I say looking her right in the eyes I am not a woman who cowers. I don't do catty bitches either whatever her deal is with Jasper has squat to do with me.

"I am sorry baby I didn't know that she even lived here anymore." Jasper says in my ear holding my hand on the table. I nod and kiss him because this is inevitable really.

"Sorry about the mix up I am your waitress Irina. Can I take your drink order?" The peppy blonde waitress asks when she gets table side.

"Can I have a sweet tea and a prosecco for the lady." Jasper tells her and then his dad orders as well informing the waitress that we will have the Chef's table for 4 with asparagus for Jasper and I and twice backed potatoes for them. She scampers off and our dinner has started out awkward and doesn't get any better for me until I get my glass of wine. I gulp it down in seconds and ask for another.

"I love you baby." Jasper says against my lips before a sweet kiss he is leaning back in his chair and looks relaxed in his posture. But I know Jasper well enough to know that he is anything but relaxed his eyes are sharpened the muscles in his neck are tightened. I kiss him back once and then kissed him a second time.

"I love you too lets eat and then you can take me home. We have things to hash out tonight huh." I tell him and kiss him one more time. He smirks at me but it is forced and I don't like that so I wink at him.

"Look how cute they are I remember being that in love." Momma says and Sherman laughs and kisses her.

"I am still that in love." He kisses her nose and she nods at him leaning her head on his shoulder. The rest of dinner is easier the food is delicious and I mean maybe the best meal I have ever had.

When we are done Jasper taps his glass and stands in the restaurant. I gasp and blush and his dad laughs a little while his mom hides her face.

"Sorry to interrupt everyones meal but I just want to take a minute. My parents have been married 43 years today I wanted to say Happy Anniversary and thank you for showing me what love is and that marriage is the end goal finding the person you want forever. I hope that the woman I chose here and I can follow your example." He says loudly and points to me. When he ends there are shouts of happy anniversary and congratulations. He leans down grabbing my face in his hands and kissing me again.

"What am I going to with you boy? You always were a showboat." Momma says slapping his hand. She is laughing and hugging her son.

"If your dear son would have told me that it was your anniversary then I would have brought a gift." I say to momma holding her hand across the table. Her and Sherman are amazing people they have taken me into their family like I was born there.

"You gave us our boy back he came home and he is happy that is enough for me." She says squeezing my hands back and the sparkle in her eyes make me smile back her in elation. I hope that I make her son as happy as he makes me.

"To bad I actually made you something already. I will bring it by Friday on my way to the airport." I say and instantly regret it because I didn't tell Jasper before we left. He looks at me from the side of his eye and looks stricken. He is signing the check after arguing with his dad about who was paying.

"I am going to see my family this weekend so I can get my wedding dress." I say to the table in explanation is a good excuse but really I just need a break. Jasper and I haven't been getting along and I just need to get away a couple of days.

"That's good you will need your momma for that." Jaspers mom says letting go of my hand and sitting back in her chair.

Jasper helps me into the truck after we say our goodbyes we are quiet in the car that dinner was relieving to say the least.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you that I was going to go home. Things here have just been strained the last week or so here and I thought it would be a good time to go. I have a job offer from Frank's so it may be my last chance to go home for a while." I tell him taking his hand that is sitting in the middle seat. He looks over at me with a sad smile.

"Don't be sorry baby I was just surprised that you leaving at the end of the week." He says squeezing my hand but looking back at the road not giving me much of a reaction.

"This shit with Angela. I didn't know I would ever have to deal with it again and it was years ago. She means nothing to me and she is a disloyal selfish bitch but I don't want her words to have any effect on us because she is full of shit." Jasper says as we pull up in front of the house.

"I just want to know what she was talking about. You don't have to tell me right now but one day I would like to know." I tell him and open my door and hopping out of the truck with my shoes in my hand. I walk around the side of the house and lay in the hammock that hangs between to two large oaks.

"Do you mind if I join you baby?" Jasper says and I put my foot down so that Jasper can get in the hammock with me. He lays next to me puts his arm behind my head and I snuggle into him because no matter what I love him.

"Angela was my high school sweetheart and for along time I thought it was love. After I left for the navy she pushed marriage and I was reluctant. We were young we hadn't experienced life yet I wanted her but didn't want to rush into marriage. She visited me before my first deployment and everything was fine but I still wasn't keen on getting married I deployed shortly after she left. Fast forward a year I spent 11 months in the desert getting shot at and sweating my ass off. I come home for Christmas and she has her own life which was to be expected I didn't live here. She acted weird toward me and my family we spent some time together but not like we used to but she dropped the marriage talk so I let it go." I am giving him the really look because i know he is not a stupid man but that is a dumb ass move. He chuckles at me.

"I know I know dumbass right. But I was young and I didn't know any better I thought that maybe she realized we had a good thing. She emails me while I am in training a couple months later to tell me she is pregnant and she will be coming to visit me when I get back. I was shocked to say the least and I wasn't happy about the timing but it wasn't impossible. So I called my mom to ask her to check on Angela to make sure she had everything she would need and the situation. Mom was pissed this wasn't how we do things but she would do what I asked because this was her family." This story is hurting my heart he has a child out there with somewhere with someone else.

"She came to the East coast about a month later and it was as if she hated me. I couldn't touch her she didn't want to tell me what had happened at the doctor, she had lost weight her cheeks were sunken in. I asked if she was eating, did she need money, we should get married so her medical and the baby's would be covered and she laughed in my face. I had no idea what had happened until she returned home. Edward called me the day she left laughing. _Did you have fun little brother? Was she able to fuck you? I bet it didn't feel the same if she did. I hope you enjoyed her after I had her and made that baby. Don't worry I made her get rid of it I don't want a fucking kid and a junkie whore doesn't need one either."_ Jasper mimics his brothers voice and the story makes me want to vomit. How could one brother be so evil to the other?

"I knew he had been dabbling in drugs "Blowing off steam" but I didn't know he was so bad. Angela's betrayal was fucked up but I think Edward doing this to me was worse. He had messed with her head and mine. I broke it off immediately told my parents what happened. I didn't see Angela again I changed phone numbers and went on with my life. It was a cold move I know but I couldn't deal with it." Jasper says and I squeeze his hand and we sit in silence. What a messed up situation it makes me glad for a split second that I am glad I don't have siblings.

"That is shit babe no one deserves that. I won't say I am sorry because a small part of men is glad that there isn't a kid running around out there with your blonde locks and blue eyes. I hate that they hurt you but addicts do crazy things. It says a lot about you that you have started to forgive Edward I think you should try to forgive Angela too. I am not saying talk to her but maybe write her a letter and drop it off at her work." I tell him closing my eyes.

"You are too good and that's why I love you." Jasper says rubbing his thumb across my knuckles.

"I love you too handsome. Let's go to bed I am ready for some sleep." I tell him.

"You're going home this weekend? You will come back right." Jasper asks me as we climb in bed that night. His face is pulled in concern and I don't know why he would think that.

"Of course I am babe I will be home on Monday afternoon." I tell him hugging him from behind as he sits on the bed kissing his shoulder.

"Momma will be here to get you on Monday. I will be at the shop. I want you to come by I have something for you." Jasper says in the drop off line at the airport he leans over and kisses me.

"I can't wait I love you Jasper I will be home in 3 days." I tell him holding his cheek and kiss him and get out of the truck.

"I love you too fiancé." Jasper yells and I blow a kiss a him and walk into the airport. I text Rose from the gate telling her that my flight is on time. I get dancing emoji's back which make me laugh. I am sitting here listening to my favorite dystopian series thinking how much has changed this year.

"Welcome to SeaTac where local time is 11 am and the temperature is 62 degrees we are taxiing to the gate now. Thank you for flying with PanPacific today." The stewardess says after landing. The flight was fast as I napped during the flight. I turned my phone on and messages came through.

 _J - Hey baby miss you already and I love you. I can't wait to see you in that beautiful dress you are going to pick._

 _Rose - I am waiting for you outside of security._

I text Rose back a simple okay. Jaspers text makes me smile which earns him just that a selfie of my smile.

"You look amazing Bells." Rose says hugging my when I get outside of the secure area. We hug and I start to cry I have missed her and I didn't really realize how much till right now.

"Don't start that shit we only have a weekend together lets not ruin it with the sappy stuff." Rose says wiping her eyes as well. She takes my hand and we head towards the doors.

"Deal but you can't be such a bitch either." I say winking at her. I am happy that I came home I needed this. Rose and I go to our favorite sushi restaurant and sit and she tells me all about her and Emmett and she shows me her newest addition of body art which is a teal ribbon in the center of a Celtic knot. Her and Emmett seem to be progressing nicely and she might be going back to New York soon and moving in with Emmett. I hope that she doesn't let her fear hold her back and goes for it with him. From everything Jasper says he is a great man and she seems happy that is what matters to me.

"How is everything in the Lone star state? I never thought that my artsy best friend would be marrying a cowboy in Texas." She says smiling at me I love our banter and I have missed it.

"I would do anything for him if he wanted to move the wilderness and live in a tent I would do it. He loves me like my dad loves my mom." I say smiling because I can't help the smile when he comes to mind. As if he can hear my thoughts my phone rings and Rose snatches the check and walks to the front and I answer the call.

"Hey babe." I say into the phone. Smiling in response to Jasper's name coming across her phone.

"I hate this house without you. How was your flight?" He sighs in the phone at the end. He sounds sad and this might be more time away from one another than we have had since New York.

"I miss you too but I will be home Monday. It was good I slept most of it. Rose and I just finished lunch she is going to drop me off at my parents." I tell him.

"Okay baby I am glad that you made it to Washington safely. I just wanted to make sure you are okay is all I love you." Jasper says and I am glad he called because I miss him too.

"I love you too babe I will call you after I get settled at my parents." I tell him and we hang up.

"You look sad standing here love. Do you miss your man?" Rose says to me grabbing her keys from the carpet bag she is carrying.

"A little yeah Jasper and I spend so much time together knowing that I won't be able to just go home and see him feels weird. That sounds a little codependent doesn't it. We have just been through a lot since we got together. The dress appointment is at 10 tomorrow mom will pick you up so we can drink champagne." I say winking at her ready to enjoy some time with my mom, Rose and some of our local friends. We ride to my childhood home in comfortable silence. I look at everything out the window Washington is really beautiful but it makes me miss home all the more.

"Belly your here. I am so glad you came home to find a dress." My mom says hugging me as soon as I walk in the door. Dad is still at work and I knew he would be he works crazy hours as a cop. but my mom is off on the weekends and after 5. I went to my old room with my carry on and got my pajamas out and went to take a shower. Looking at myself in the mirror naked was still hard for me. I was slight before I got sick and now I look like I have starved myself for months which doesn't happen to be the case. I eat well but the chemo really took a lot out of me my hair has thinned out my muscle mass is all but gone and my skin even looks washed out. I don't like the way I look naked but it will get better as my body bounces back from the sickness and treatment.

Dad brings home beer and pizza which is greasy but being home with my parents in my childhood home is something that you cant put words to. I have missed them and the next time I am here I won't be Isabella Swan. They say you cant go home again and its true I am just a visitor in their lives and I have made my own with a wonderful man a world away from here.


	12. Christmas Gift

Disclaimer : I own nothing from Twilight that is all property of SM.

Mom, Rose and I spend some time at the local mall before we hit up the dress shop. Rose insists on buying me my something new. I pick out a corset and panty set from a ridiculously priced lingerie store. But she wanted me to have it and make sure I had it to try on dresses tomorrow. We have had a fun day together walking from store to store I even bought myself a second set of lingerie for our honeymoon.

"I hope you find the dress you want here Belly I can't wait to see them on you," Mom says to me patting my knee which is bouncing up and down because I am crazy nervous about putting on that dress. We are all in the car driving toward the boutique mom and Rose chatter away about colors, veils, and even high heels which for me were out of the question as we are getting married in a barn. The small shop where my appointment is a small hole in the wall shop that carries smaller designers.

"Welcome to New Moon Designs. I am Carmen and you must be Bella Swan." Says a petite woman with caramel colored skin, long black hair and bright green eyes. I reach out and shake her hand as does my mom and Rose.

"Any ideas of what you like don't like? Venue restrictions?" Carmen asks while directing us to the seating area.

"I would like an ivory or champagne dress fairly modest as it will be winter. No long train either we are getting married in a barn. I also like the fit and flare or a line." I tell her and she nods.

"There is champagne here and I think that I have a few dresses in mind for you to try. I will back shortly do you already have undergarments?"

"I do and I brought them. I don't have shoes or a veil." I say to her as she pours champagne and nods at me. I look around the small shop and it is just us but mom had said it is an appointment only shop. Carmen waves me back a few minutes later and I stand to grab my bag with the corset and thong in it. Carmen opens the door to a large fitting room with 5 or so dresses in it she and I walk in and she closes the door.

"Let's get you into one of these." She says patting the taffeta dress. I nod and start to undress not excited about how thin I am. But hopefully, I can start gaining some weight back.

"Warning for the tailor I just got into my second round of chemotherapy. I haven't been as sick so hopefully, I won't be this thin come December." I tell her and I am trying to joke but I am having a hard time doing so. She pats my shoulder and helps me clasp the corset up in the back. Six no's later and the last dress Carmen has brought in is beautiful fit and flare dress with a beaded design reminding me of the 1920's. I walk out to the three-sided mirror where my mom and friends sit and when I look up into the mirror I gasp. I look like a bride and I know immediately that this is the dress.

"This is an ivory and champagne beaded tulle fit and flare gown with cap sleeves, scoop neckline, heavy beading down the center front, diagonal beading around natural waist and crisscross beading down side hips to dropped waist, and feather-like embroidery design with beading appear to be floating toward the hem with a sweep train," Carmen say's as she pulls the small train around to lay right. I turn to my mom and she has her hand over her mouth and her tears are falling over her cheeks and the sight causes me to tear up. I look at Rose and she has a wide grin and is nodding at me. When I look back in the mirror my mind is made up.

"I will take it. Do you have any shoes that would match?" I ask we collaborate to pick out beautiful champagne flats and I am able to get fitted that day. I fill out the shipping request to have it shipped to Texas. I had a great time in Washington but when I get back onto the plane on the way back home. Rose and I promised to talk more we had lost a little after her attack and my subsequent move to Texas.

"I can't fucking wait to see you," Jasper growls in my ear when I call him from the terminal. I am smiling like a loon because I am stupidly excited to see him.

"Your mom texted me she is in the waiting area I told her I am walking out now. I will be there soon I have missed you and I love you, babe. I will be at the shop shortly" I tell him as I clear the sliding doors and the heat hits me. It was cool in Washington but it is still 80 here. Sweat is a constant here and instantly breaks out across the back of my neck.

"I love you too be careful," Jasper says back and we hang up. Momma is there within minutes and we are off to the shop. I tell her everything that happened in Washington and show her a photo of the dress I picked and she says she cant wait to see me in it. She has already offered me her veil which is why I didn't buy one. The veil has been in the Whitlock family for a hundred years or so and I am honored to wear it as well. As we get close to the shop I get butterflies at seeing Jasper. I have missed him. Momma chuckles at me and I look at her with my brow lifted in question.

"Nothing darling its just your whole demeanor changing the closer we get. I can see the excitement in your eyes. It is the only thing I ever wanted for my children was real love and happiness Jasper has that with you." She says never taking her eyes off the road. I thank her and I see that Jasper is standing on the sidewalk out side the tattoo shop as we turn the corner. I have to laugh and so does momma. As soon as the car is at a complete stop Jasper has the door wrenched open and I have jumped out at him. His face goes right to my neck and we both sigh. This is home before I left I knew that he was all I wanted but the space made me more sure.

"Thank you for brining me my girl ma. We will come to the house tomorrow. I love you." He says to his mom pulling me back and shutting the door. I should have said thank you to mom. But I have my arms around Jasper's neck and I just want to be right here.

"Oh, you smell good baby. I didn't think it was possible to miss anyone this quickly. You don't get to leave anymore because I sleep like complete shit without you." Jasper says against my neck he has his arms wrapped around me. I don't say anything because my throat is tight. Jasper introduces me to all of his coworkers and I am polite but right now I couldn't care less.

"I drew this for us I thought maybe while Emmett is here for the wedding we could get this tattooed. I want us to get them for our wedding gift. No pressure if you don't like it you don't have to get it but I will be getting it." He sets the drawing down in front of me and I love it. It's not a large tattoo but it is the silhouette of the empire state building and then our wedding date in scrawling script and then into the brand for the Whitlock ranch. I look up at where he is resting his hip against the table in his room.

"I love it but I don't want Emmett to tattoo it I want you to do it," I tell him and the smile that breaks across his face is breath taking. He has small bags under his eyes and his hair is greasy but he looks amazing to me.

"I wouldn't let him tattoo you anyway baby," Jasper says and kisses the day lights out of me. We spend the rest of the afternoon at the shop and he tattoos my wedding present on my body and I love it. It will be perfectly healed for the wedding.

Life continues for us pretty normally we fall into a rhythm. I begin working two days a week for 5 or so hours a day. As summer is ending I start to spend more time at the ranch with all of the Whitlock's. Momma has taught me to can vegetables and let me help her in her garden who knew I had a green thumb. I have started gaining some of my weight back and my dress fittings have been great my body fills it out much better now.

Jasper went to visit Edward in rehab before Thanksgiving and he will be coming for the wedding with an escort. But I know that it makes the family happy that he will be here. Thanksgiving was nice we went to Jaspers parents and they had all of their employees and their families. It was more people than I had possibly ever had a meal with in my life. But I could see it a life filled with all of these people our friends and family surrounding us in this home.

"You look like that cat that ate the canary baby," Jasper says low enough that no one else can hear him. I smile up at him and wink making him chuckle.

"I was just thinking that this is our life together we will be here with a home full of love and one day our own kids running around," I said to him leaning into his side. He smiles down at me wrapping his arm around me kissing my head.

"Yes, ma'am it will be and as many kids as you will give me." He tells me making me smile. I blush some but take the complement.

"Every year we all go around and say what we are thankful for and this year I would like to start this year. My youngest son came home and brought this lovely young woman with him as well my oldest son who has had some issues is getting the help that he needs. I have had a lifetime of good and bad but this year is definitely one of the better." Pops raises his glass and we follow everyone goes around the table saying what they are thankful for. When it is my turn I stand.

"This year has been one of the best and worst of my life this year I am thankful for my life. I came very close to losing everything this year and if it wasn't for Jasper, I would not be here. Thank you all for accepting me into this family. It is an honor to join such a strong and honorable family." I say lifting my glass knowing that Jasper is next and whatever he has to say is probably going to choke me up.

"As you all know I am getting married to this beautiful woman next month. So this year I am thankful for her love. She has shown me that even after everything I have done in my life that God still saw it fitting to give me the most amazing woman. My parents have always shown me what real love looked like and now I get to have it for the rest of my life." He says reaching for my hand and raising his glass. I smile up at him because I love him and I know that even if it's not perfect our life will be ours.

"When do your parents fly in?" Jaspers' voice rumbles against my ear and I sigh at him. This month will be so busy and laying here feels like heaven.

"The nineteenth and Rose is coming in with Emmett. Edward is getting here on Christmas Eve right?" I ask him not even opening my eyes. Jasper has been so busy and so have I that we have been missing meals together and I am asleep most nights when he comes in. I am basking in him while I can before we get busy again. We are laying on a pallet that he made on the floor in front of the fireplace my head on his chest and his hand running through my hair I am perfectly content.

"Yep, I want you to drive up with me since we won't have much time before that alone until the honeymoon." He says and I just nod he knows that I wouldn't turn away time with him down. I am not sure where we are going on our honeymoon since he won't tell me. I know it will be great to be alone with him after all of the hubbubs of the wedding. Everything is planned and ready we are getting married Christmas morning with a brunch planned after the ceremony. We wanted to spend Christmas with everyone we love and the biggest holiday of the year be our first day as man and wife. I have told Rose that I do not want a bachelorette party and I would like to just have her my mom and soon to be the mother in law over the night before and have a good dinner talk whatever. Jasper has asked for the same things he will stay at his parents that night.

"You, my friend are getting married tomorrow my friend and I have to say that I never thought it would be you first," Rose says making Jaspers mom choke on her wine and me laugh.

"I can't either really I never thought that I would meet a guy who could keep up with me let alone love me," I say only partly joking. I am a head strong woman and I don't bend on many things. Jasper is patient with me and always takes my opinion into account.

"He hasn't always been a patient man I promise he was hell on wheels as a child," Momma says picking up her glass and taking a sip. Her and my mom get along which is funny they are real opposites.

"Bella has always been stubborn she has a set of scars on her wrist that are from her touching the fireplace stones multiple times as a child." My mom says smugly giving me the mom eye. Everyone laughs lightly and I roll my eyes.

"Wonder where I get that from huh?" I say to my mom looking at her with my trademark brow. We all have a great night really sharing stories and drinking wine. Around midnight pours me into bed after aspirin and a bottle of water.

"Come on Bells wake up." I hear and then get a subsequent shake I groan and roll over opening one eye to see my blond bombshell best friend sitting on my bed in a silk robe and rollers in her hair.

"What time is it?" I groan I should feel worse but I am just tired.

"Just after 6, I waited till the last minute to wake you up." She reaches over to the night stand to grab the cup of coffee. I sit up, take the cup and moan at the devious sweet concoction. Coffee and I, we have a long-standing love affair.

"Okay, you need to come to the bathroom and let me put rollers in this hair of yours." She says pulling the ends of my hair making me laugh. I get up and put my button up night gown on so that I wouldn't mess my hair up and plop down in the chair that Rose has set up. I drink while she works. Once she gets the curlers set I dig out the makeup I want to use and start on my make up. I want a natural look so I put on my foundation, a little blush, eyeliner, mascara, light pink eyeshadow. But I love a good red lipstick and so I make sure to get my red lip stain.

"You look beautiful Jasper won't be able to look anywhere but at you. I love you Bells and I am so damn happy for you." Rose says from behind me as she starts taking out my rollers. I blow her a kiss in the mirror. She has told me about her and Emmett since she has been here and I am happy for her too.

"We are just in time Charlie." I hear my mom say and turn to see her all dressed up and my dad in his tux. I tear up at the sight his face is clean shaven and he looks so uncomfortable in a suit jacket and green tie. He is pulling at his tie and the bottom of his suit jacket.

"Dad and I have a gift for you but Jasper coordinated with us for a present for you. This is your new and blue." Mom says and dad hands me a large necklace box. I open it and pull out a string of pearls with a sapphire heart clasp I am trying not to tear up. My hands shake as I run my fingers over the cool pearls.

"The pearls are a gift from Jasper. Your father and I had the sapphire clasp put on. Let me put them on you." I nod because if I open my mouth I will cry. Mom puts the string around my neck and against my skin they are a very light bronze color they are beautiful I run my fingers alone the cool beads on my neck.

"He gave us this for you. Rose and I will be back in a few minutes to get you into your dress. It is almost time. Thank you mom and dad I love you both so much. Rose I love you too and I would not have made it today without you. Will you take Jasper his present too?" They all nod at me and walk out the door. I sit on Jasper and I's bed and open the envelope.

 _Isabella,_

 _I have sat here all night thinking about what to write to you. I know that most men are nervous and get drunk today but I want to remember every second of today. This is the beginning of our lives together and I can't wait. You have already made me the happiest man by agreeing to be mine. I never would have thought that I would get married and want children but I want everything with you the whole shebang. Thank you baby for being mine and for loving me the same way that I love you. Lets begin this journey the meaning of the pearls I gave you are supposed to represent karma, strengthen relationships, and keep children safe. This is my wish on our wedding day is to strengthen us from here on out and protect what is mine. I love you and I will be waiting at the end of the aisle. Enjoy your last moments as a Swan._

 _Jasper Whitlock_

His letter leaves me speechless and my heart racing and I hope he loves his gift as much as I do mine although the moleskin sketch book that I made for him seems lame in comparison. I cant wait to marry him as if hearing my thoughts Rose knocks and poke her head in the door.

"Ready?" She asks and I nod emphatically my mom, Jaspers mom and Rose all come in and we are ready to get dressed.


	13. Luck isn't real

AN: This chapter is short way short compared to my others but I wanted to give y'all a small peak into Jaspers mind and not give too much of the wedding away. I hope y'all enjoy.

Thanksgiving

Seeing Bella here with everyone that I love is a beautiful sight she looks right at home. When people ask what love feels like I want to tell them that it feels like home. You know the first time that you leave home and then return to visit. You feel a sense of loss like you aren't home it doesn't feel the same. Being in love feels a lot the same like you have come home. After we have all said thankful's and ate the wonderful meal. Bella and I head home. In bed that night I hold her for hours watching her sleep. She hasn't been as sick after this round of chemo and I pray that it is her last one. She is to thin but she has started to run again and I worry every time she goes but I have to let her get some space.

"You look, good brother," I say to Edward he is sitting in my parents living room and I know that he is clean and sober. I can see it in his eyes and his posture.

"Thanks, I am glad that Y'all invited me and that I don't feel like death anymore," Edward says to me. He is nervous his hands are in his lap and he is pulling at his fingers.

"No matter what has happened brother we are family. You will always be my brother and the fact that you are sober and wanted to be here is why you are here." I say to him. I have chosen to forgive and even to forget a little. We are brothers and nothing, not even his betrayal could undo a lifetime of memories.

"I know that what I have done is fucked up Jasper and I am sorry for all of that. I told you that when you visited but I wanted to tell you again. The things that I have done over the years are not forgivable but I am here begging for your forgiveness." Edward is saying with tears threatening to spill over his eyes. I stand up and so does he. We hug probably for the first time in a decade. The night before the wedding is quiet Emmett, Edward, dad, and I just hang out. I kick Emmett's ass in video games and pass out around midnight.

When my alarm goes off I get up and get in the shower. I have been waiting for this day since Bella and I's first date. When she slept through that tattoo I was in shock. She was small but fierce and that fire that she has is undeniable. I never thought that I would get to be happy in the end. My childhood was great we didn't have much and we worked a lot as kids. But we had to parents who were happy and good for each other. Edward was my best friend for most of my life. I stand in the shower with my hands and head against the cold tile.

I remember the first time I thought I could have happiness and that went beautifully. The deployments the men I lost. My brothers and sisters who would never come home and the years that it took me to dig myself out of that ditch. These are not things that most people would think about the morning of their own wedding but these are things that I must think about every day. I need to remember the people that I love and have lost. I live for them, I fought for them and I will love for them. Bella is the love of my life and I only have god to thank for that. I can't wait to see her today. She will walk down that aisle and become mine for good. Bella's present is with her mom and dad. I really hope that I got her something she will like. She is a particular woman and she doesn't like frivolous gifts but this one has all the meaning that I need it too. My tux and shirt are pressed and on a hanger, I am sitting in my childhood bedroom looking at the walls.

"Hey man, you about ready?" Emmett says from the door snapping men out of my daydream. I look up at him and laugh. I have never seen him in a monkey suit but he likes the maid of honor so I think he's doing it for her.

"Yeah, I still need to put that on but other than that I am ready. You clean up nice by the way asshole." I told him pointing at my tux and then at him. He sits in the chair across from me. His smile is jovial he has always been this way. The entire time I have known him anyway. We met while in theater and even in the grit of things he smiled.

"You seem happy man and there isn't anyone that deserves it more. Let's go get you married man so that you can prove all those assholes wrong that say were fucked up and unloveable." He says and he is still smiling but I know that those words hold weight. I stand up and grab my dress shirt sliding it on.

Dad and Rose walk in after I get my jacket on both are smiling like the cat ate the canary. Dad hugs me tight and I kiss Rose on the cheek.

"Get your paws off of my woman," Emmett says pulling Rose into the chair with him she squeals and then laughs. I shake my head because he is whipped and she is great for the oaf.

"Let me go I have a present to Jasper and you need to go take your place," Rose tells Emmett pushing his hands away and sitting up. She hands me a package with a card attached and Rose pulls Emmett to his feet and out the door. Dad shuts the door behind them and turns to me. I smile up at him and he takes my tie from me and starts to tie it.

"I am proud of you son. You have become an extraordinary man and this woman that you have chosen to spend your life with is suited to you. I think that the two of you will lead a long and happy life together and I hope that you have as much happiness as me and your mom have had. Now let me get out so you can read that note from your lady and go marry her." Dad has never been a man of many words but this hits me hard because I am happy. Dad finishes my tie and I have to hug him tight. He walks out and I sit down on the bed with the soft package and card. I take the card off the package and set it aside and pull the cord off of the package. Her gift is sweet and thoughtful just like my woman is. My wedding gift is a moleskin sketchbook that Bella has carved the design I drew for our wedding. Bella and my mom had it put on the wedding invitations as well. I smile at the book and open it. She has drawn a sunrise from our front porch the way that she sees it. This might be the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever gotten me and I can't wait to see her. I open the small card and see her simple script.

 _Jasper,_

 _We are about to get married. That sentence is shocking to me. I can't believe that you chose me. But I am glad you did, it all started with my best friend getting reckless and wanting a tattoo. I have been waiting for you my whole life and never knew it. Thank you for choosing me over and over again, thank you for staying by my side when you didn't have to. I love you Jasper and I can't wait to be your wife. I will see you at the alter but I won't be in white. ;)_

 _Isabella Swan (for a few more minutes that is.)_

Walking down to the barn that I grew up playing in helping dad stack hay in. The barn is decorated but I couldn't care less I am just ready to see my girl walk in. I stop and talk to friends and family on my way up the aisle but I am in a bit of a blur. I don't do nerves for the most part after you get shot at and ride along roads with bombs nervous takes on a new meaning.

"You ready man this is the real deal. If you want out let me know I will tell everyone." Emmett says and laughs. I shake my head and shake his hand we do the bro hug. My mom, dad and Bella's mom are in the front row and Edward is standing next to Emmett. We stand around chatting until our song starts. I smile and look towards the barn doors. When I see her walk in I take a gasping breath she looks beautiful. She is glowing the lace on her dress makes her look like she is made for a red carpet. I don't even hear the lyrics to the song. We chose this song because it fits us and our story. I meet her eyes and smile she looks like a million bucks and in the end today she is all mine. This is the beginning of our story.


	14. I Do

AN: Updated chapter Stephaine Meyer owns twilight and all associated characters.

Jasper and I chose to write vows of our own and I hope that I can get through mine without tears. My dress is on, I have touched up my makeup and Rose has situated my hair slicked down on one side and pinned with all my curls cascading down my back momma has pinned the lace veil in place. I don't look like me in the mirror I don't know who the woman standing there is but it can't be me.

"You look beautiful Isabella. But you will always be my little girl and just because he is your husband doesn't mean that I won't shoot him if necessary. I hope he makes you the happiest woman on the planet. This is a coin is for you to borrow. I will put it in your shoe it is to bring luck. " My dad says and he bends down and tucks the coin into the silk he has pulled it from and drops it into the side of my shoe. When he stands he tucks my hand into the crook of his elbow as Jaspers mom and mine walk through the barn door and we hear Bittersweet Symphony by The Verve start up and dad pats my hand as we walk toward the doors. I take a deep breath and open my eyes slowly as the doors open. The barn is beautiful there are wooden pews of different sizes and colors. 3 on each side of the aisle. No real flowers but painted metal sunflowers at the beginning and ending of the aisle that Tanya made for us and they are beautiful. A red runner is our aisle and as dad and I make our first step onto it I lift my head and see Jasper for the first time. We make eye contact and I gasp his eyes are a brilliant blue and the smile on his face is magnificent. I smile back at him and it takes all my power not to run down the aisle and run into his arms.

"Ladies and Gentlemen please be seated. We are gathered here today in the presence of God to bear witness to the marriage of this man and this woman. Marriage is a commitment in life, where two people can find and bring out the very best in each other. It offers opportunities for sharing and growth that no other human relationship can equal, a physical and emotional joining that has the promise of a lifetime. The couple would like to exchange their own vows. We come now to the words Jasper and Isabella want to hear the most today. The words that take them across the threshold from being two single people to being married. A marriage as most of us understand it, is a voluntary and full commitment. It is made in the deepest sense to the exclusion of all others, and it is entered into with the desire and hope that it will last for life. Before you declare your vows to one another, I want to hear you confirm that it is indeed your intention to be married today. Jasper, do you come here freely and without reservation to give yourself to Isabella in Holy matrimony? If so, answer I do." Paster Billy says

"I do," Jasper says steady and true. His face is set in a smile and he looks so handsome standing here before me.

"Isabella do you come here freely and without reservation to give yourself to Jasper in

Holy matrimony? If so, answer I do." Paster Billy turns to me with the same expectation.

"I do," I say loud and clear. I have never been so sure about anything else in my life than I am right now.

"Jasper and Isabella having heard that it is your intention to be married to each other, I now ask that you declare your marriage vows. Please face each other and hold hands." Pastor Billy says he is the pastor at the cowboy church that Jasper grew up going to. Jasper and I turn to each other.

"I, Jasper take you Isabella to be my wife. I promise to choose you every day, to love you in word and deed, to do the hard work of making now into always. To laugh with you, cry with you, grow with you, and create with you. To honor the divinity in you, of you, and around you. To be your protector and your partner in all of life's adventures. Loving what I know of you and trusting what I don't yet know, I give you my hand. I give you my love. I give you myself." Jaspers voice rings through the barn and his voice is even and true. I feel the tears welling but now is not the time for that. I straighten up my shoulders and look Jasper in the eyes. I want to remember every second of this.

"I, Isabella take you, Jasper to be my husband. I promise to always be your biggest fan and your partner in crime. I promise to create and support a family with you, in a household filled with laughter, patience, understanding, and love. I vow not just to grow old together, but to grow together. I will love you faithfully through the difficult and the easy. Whatever may come, I will always be there, believing that love never dies. As I have given you my hand to hold, so I give you my life to keep." I get all of my vows out and I don't hear not even a crack in my voice which surprises me but I have never said truer words. Jasper's eyes are glossy and that doesn't help me fight my tears.

"This ring marks the beginning of our journey together. Wear it proudly, for it publicly displays the love that I have for you." Jasper says as he slides the ring down on my finger and I am tearing up even worse now. I take a deep breath and stamp down the emotion so that I can give him his ring.

"This ring marks the beginning of our journey together. Wear it proudly, for it publicly displays the love that I have for you." I say to Jasper my voice is breaking and tears are running down my face as I slide the ring onto Jaspers' finger.

"Without further ado, I would like to offer my congratulations and say that by the power vested in me by our Lord and Savior and the great state of Texas. I now pronounce you husband and wife. By all means, Jasper kiss your beautiful bride." Pastor Billy no more gets the words out his mouth before Jasper is cradling my face in his hands and seals his lips to mine it is one hell of a kiss. I get one peck, then a second and before I can think twice I have opened my mouth and he has slid his tongue in my mouth. The cheers and catcalls are almost deafening that makes me realize that there are other people. I pull back and rest my forehead on Jaspers we are both panting.

"You are my wife and I fucking love you." Jasper still has that mega watt smile that outshines the sun. He is holding my face still and the moment is surreal that I am standing in a barn with this glorious man and I am his wife.

"And you are my husband I love you more than I thought was possible," I tell him and we are ushered away for photos and the guests go for cocktails and it's not too cold outside the barn luckily. The barn is being turned over for brunch while we take photos. Brunch goes off without a hitch speeches are fun and mildly inappropriate which is to be expected.

"Let's dance baby I picked this song just for you I mean every word," Jasper says as he pulls me to my feet. We walk to the dance floor which is just really an open space after the photos I had Rose button my dress up so its train didn't drag in the dirt. Jasper wraps his arms around my waist and I wrap mine around his neck and as the song starts I cry. The first day of my life by Bright eyes comes on and my heart clinches at the lyrics. This is what he has been telling me all along that this day is the beginning of our lives together.

"I don't know if I have told you this but you look magnificent today I thought I was going to pass out when you walked through those doors," Jasper tells me and I am so happy at the moment in his arms that I have things to say back. I can't get the words out I lay my head against his chest and pull his body closer to mine. The reception is perfect and as we are nearing the end when momma grabs me to tell me that we can leave whenever we want. I have danced with everyone and I am dead on my feet.

"Take me home husband," I whisper in Jaspers ear while he is sitting and talking with a friend its just after three in the afternoon. He turns to me and smiles wrapping his arm around me.

"My wife is ready to go home gents so I am blowing this popsicle stand see Y'all next year." He says standing as the guys laugh and they do the bro hugs and offer congratulations. I move toward the DJ and ask for a microphone nodding in thanks when he hands it to me.

"Sorry to interrupt but my husband and I want to thank you all for coming to celebrate with us on the happiest day of our lives," I say and look at Jasper the crowd starts chanting kiss her kiss her kiss her. They have done so many times today I have lost count. He kisses me sweetly dipping me and all making me laugh out loud against his hips making everyone clap.

"I am going to take my new wife home now we will see everyone after the new year. Thank Y'all for coming we love every one of you." Jasper says grabbing my hand and heading toward the barn doors. He jerks the door open and there sits his truck with just married painted on the window and cans tied under the tailgate. Jasper opens the door and lifts me into the truck making me squeal. I roll the window down and wave as Jasper runs around the front and jumps in. The keys are in the ignition already and I slide across the seat into Jaspers side wrapping my arms around his arm. He lays his head against mine and drives down the dirt road to our house. We pull up in front of the house the temperature has cooled dramatically since this morning.

"Don't move," Jasper says jumping out of the truck and reaching for me I slide over and he takes me in his arm and I slide down his body. I instantly flush because his body is hard in all the right places. I look up at him when my feet touch the ground and I kiss him and slide my tongue against his bottom lips and he opens his mouth.

"Let's go inside it is getting cold. I have many things I would like to do to you baby." Jasper says running his hands up and down my arms. He takes my hand and pulls my up the three stairs onto the porch opening the door and turning back to me.

"You don't have to do this ya know. It is a silly tradition." I say and he picks me up carrying me in the house. I am laughing as he kicks the door shut with his foot and walks toward the bedroom.

"We have stuck with enough tradition why not follow through. I can't wait to get you out of this dress." Jasper says sitting me down on the bed. I look up at him and bite my lip I don't think I have ever been nervous with him not until right now. I kick my shoes off.

"I love this dress baby you look amazing in it but right now I just want it off of you," Jasper says and I stand up in front of him and turn my back toward him so that he can unzip the dress. He reaches and takes my hands pulling me flush against him and kisses my ring then running his hands up my arms and under the edge of the sleeve.

"Don't tease me it's not very nice husband," I say and my voice is tight even to my own ears. Jasper runs his hand across my neck moving my hair to the other side he leans down and kisses below my ear making me moan.

"You should know you have been teasing me since you walked through those doors this morning wife and I am going to take my sweet time claiming my wife's body for the first time." Jasper bites my ear lobe and starts on the zipper at the top of my neck. He stands up and takes a step back so he can watch the zipper go down. Agonizingly slow he pulls the zipper down and gasps as the corset come into view and I smile at his reaction I will have to tell him to thank Rose. He gets the dress unzipped to the small of my back where the space between my corset and thong. He drops to his knees behind me and kisses my back tenderly. I look over my shoulder at him as he stands and kisses my shoulder.

"You are trying to fucking kill me aren't you baby." He says and then slams his lips into mine I moaned into him.

"No, I am trying to make you a very happy man. That is now my job right." I say biting his bottom lip and help him get the sleeves of my dress down my arms.

"You made me a very happy man when you said I do baby this is just the cherry." He says pulling the front of my dress down. Ghosting his hands across the swell of my breasts making me moan I am dying for him already and he has barely touched me. When he gets down to the bottom of my dress he slaps my ass cheek. I moan loudly and lift one leg and then the other. He stands with my dress in his arms he lays it over the chaise in our room. I see him kick his boots off as well.

"No, no, no, now it's my turn, Mr. Whitlock. You have made me look at you in these jeans all day knowing what lays beneath them." I tell Jasper when he starts his walk back toward me I reach up and push his suit jacket off his shoulders and throw it on the bed and start on the buttons of his shirt. He lost his tie during the reception. I run my nails down his chest after I get all his buttons open making him moan. I grab his shirt and yank it out of his pants and squat in front of him grabbing his belt and slowly opening it and pulling it from his pants throwing it on the floor.

"Do you know how fucking sexy you look on your knees in front of me in that corset and thong?" Jasper growls at me and his eyes are half-lidded and his jaw is clinched. I smile up at him and unbutton and unzip his pants. Pulling them down off his hips slowly exposing his very tented boxer briefs I make sure to rub my breasts against him as I do. Making him grab my hair and look at me with fire in his eyes. He kicks his jeans away and pulls me to a standing position in front of him. He has his hand wrapped in my hair and we stand face to face both locked in a stare and panting.

"I don't want to wait anymore please Jasper I can't wait anymore. Fuck me, husband." I say to him and lift up and bite his lip. He picks me up by the waist and falls into the bed with me on top of him. I moan as his cock rubs against me through my panties. I sit up startling him and grind down on him my clit is hard and I am primed to orgasm I am moaning and throwing my head back. Jasper sits up and grabs at my corset untying it with deft fingers I run my hands through his hair and he bites the swell of my breast and I tilt his head back and slip my tongue in his mouth.

"You better not cum before I am inside of you baby or you don't cum for the rest of the night. I wanted to take my time with you but I also don't want to cum in my pants like I am 15." He says pulling the corset off and tossing it. Grabbing my hair again pulling my head back biting my collar bone and flipping us over in one move. Pulling my undies off and his as well kissing up my body making me arch to his touch he licks across my nipples and neck.

"Open your eyes baby." Jasper grunts against my neck as he slams inside me I scream in pleasure and pain he stretches me. He feels different this time this all feels different. His jaw is locked as he rocks inside of me my legs are locked around his back with my heels digging into his ass.

"I love you please faster god I need more," I say to him barely above a whisper.

"I love you too baby I won't last much longer I need you to cum with me baby," Jasper says flattening us chest to chest he is holding my head in one hand and the other on the small of the back. And in a split second, I am coming apart at the seams my eyes close on their own my limbs go numb and I feel Jaspers roar and his cock erupting inside me. I wake up tucked into Jasper's side naked and covered with our blanked Jasper is snoring and it is dark. I don't remember falling asleep I remember that mind-blowing orgasm but nothing else. I move slightly trying to get out from underneath Jasper's heavy limb and he starts which is normal for him he is a very light sleeper. I decide that the need to get up can wait a little while longer and I lean my head back to look at his face while he sleeps.


	15. Day Tripping

AN: I'm BACK with another Jella story so this one is complete 17 chapters all about 3000 words a chapter. I hope y'all enjoy this story I may write another maybe not don't know yet. This is another I will post whenever let me know what you think as reviews usually make me post faster.

This is a mistake we should not be doing this but I want to. I want this and so as a free woman, I will do it.

"Rose, your dad will kill you if you get this tattoo you know that right," I tell her because while my parents won't be excited her dad will flip his shit.

"Who gives a damn if daddy likes it. He liked Royce and we see how great he was." Rose says as we walk into Red Rocker ink.

"Welcome to Red Rocker how may I help you ladies?" Says the tiny woman standing in front of the front desk moving around papers. Her arms are covered in ink and she has a barbell through her eyebrow.

"Yes, I would like to get a tattoo." Rose says walking up to the counter. The woman nods and walks to the computer. She does some typing and looks up at me.

"It looks like Jasper has some free time let me go talk to him. I am Alice can you guys have a seat I will be right back." She says walking toward the back where the doors are. About that time the bell over the door dings and a mountain of a man in a sweeping snow out of his hair.

"Damn it is cold out there why in the hell did I move to New York." Says the man not looking up. He pulls off his scarf and jacket hanging them in a closet when he turns he looks right at Rose and stops his eyes go wide and the deep dimples in his cheeks show themselves.

"Are you ladies here to get tattooed?" The big guy asks and I point at Rose because I can hear the tattoo gun and I think I am copping out.

"Yeah we want the same tattoo my friend Bella here already has a drawing." Rose says in a confident voice pointing over at me. She has her sexy smirk on and I have to not smile because if Rose wants him come hell or high water she will have him. She can be a shark.

"Alrighty then lets see the design I have no appointments for a few hours. I may be able to get you both in." He says winking at Rose and turning to me. I open my messenger bag and pull the drawing that I drew for an assignment that I had. It was a drawing that was to represent the person that meant the most to us. I drew entwining limbs and two hummingbirds sitting on them in the feathers are words woven in. Friend, loyal, gracious, humble, sister, The Hummingbirds are facing one another.

"Hey Emmett nice of you to come to work." A blond man with a southern drawl long hair and a beard says. Him and the big guy share what I like to say is a bro hug, aka half hug back pat thing.

"Alice tells me that Y'all are looking for tattoos. I have don't have anymore appointments for the day. Do you have a." He is cut off by Emmett handing him my drawing. He takes it and looks over it closely making me blush a little.

"That is a great drawing I am guessing you are Bella." Emmett says poking his hand in my direction. I take the proffered hand and realize quickly that he really is a giant.

"Thanks and I am Bella an art student at NYU." I say the drawing is complicated and it got me an A. This that I gave them is an enhanced photograph of the original because I framed the original and gave it to Rose as a Christmas present.

"Emmett is right this is a great drawing cool concept. Do you both want the same thing and where are you looking at putting it. I am Jasper by the way." He reaches out toward me and shake my hand. His skin is warm and he gives me butterflies.

"Rose and I would like one half of it each this is my half and the other is hers. I would the colors in blues a blended look like the photo." I say pointing to the bird on the left.

"I want it on my ribs on my left side." I point to ribcage and Jasper grimaces.

"I want the bird in purples and maybe a spot of red. Same place as Bella on my right side." Rose says.

"Okay, ladies if Y'all are good with it then Bella I will take you and Emmett take Rose and discuss these further and make a plan," Jasper says stepping back and gesturing for me to follow him.

"Have fun Bella I will see you in a few huh." She says with a kiss to my cheek and a wink. I nod because I am petrified honestly. Jasper sits me down in what looks like a dentists chair and goes to his scanner scans the photo in and sits down at his computer.

"You want this one right and a colored pencil texture in the color?" Jasper asks as he crops the photo at my nod and he nods as well.

"Is this your first tattoo?" He asks turning from the computer to the printer and pulls the bottom of his sweater up and over his head pulling the bottom of his shirt up in the process revealing tattooed skin on his stomach. My thighs clinch at the ink because come on tattoos are hot as fuck and as an artist myself I love them.

"Nope I have a poppy on my shoulder and a compass rose on my side." I say to him trying my damnedest not to stare. He is covered in ink one whole entire arm to his wrist is tattoos and his fingers are tattooed with the words hold fast. I can see a tattoo peaking out above his shirt collar even.

"Good because this particular place is painful and very hard to tattoo. Now that being said I can do it but the type of coloring you want the smooth saturation is hard in a place like this. So if we were to move it to a meatier place like the thigh that would give the colored pencil look that you're wanting." Jasper tells me and I appreciate his candor.

"Okay well let me talk to Rose this is her first and see if I can get her to change the placement," I tell him and he nods.

"I will draw this up want this branch and all as well as this size right?" Jasper says and I nod and head out the door toward the sound of Rose's voice she is currently laughing I knock lightly on the door and open it.

"Hey lady, Jasper said that the color would be better in a more meaty spot so what do you think about the outside of your thigh. It also won't hurt as bad there." I say and she looks at Emmett for confirmation and he nods as well.

"Okay that's fine Emmett said he can probably only finish the outline today but I will need to come back to do color." She tells me.

"Sounds like a plan if you need me I will be down the hall," I tell her looking at her smirking because her cheeks are flushed.

"I will take care of her don't worry," Emmett tells me patting her leg and I nod at him and head back to Jaspers room.

"Yeah I have a client now about 4 to 5 hours depending on how much pain she can take. She is hot maybe I should draw it out." He pauses on the phone then laughs out.

"You will not come by the shop to see her asshole." I knock on the wall letting him know I am there I feel kinda bad for eavesdropping however the knowledge that he thinks I am hot wipes that away quickly. I mouth sorry for him and grab my wallet out of my bag and point to the front he nods at me.

"Hey I need to sign the papers for Jasper but I am going to run down to 7/11 to get a drink and one for Rose," I tell Alice who grabs her wallet from her desk.

"Mind if I come with I am starving," Alice says and I smile at her and nod.

"That will be $7.15." I grab a ten and hand it to him. I ended up buying drinks, gum and peanut butter crackers for Rose just incase. He hands me my change.

"Do you work at New Moon?" Alice asks me on our walk back.

"I used too yeah but, I work uptown now at a friends gallery."

"I love that place we go all the time. I thought you looked familiar. " Alice says.

"Yeah I know the owner I worked there as an undergrad." I tell her my first 4 years at NYU I worked at a bar not far from campus as a waitress and fill in bartender. When a former grad student I knew opened an art gallery uptown he offered me a job and I took it. Walking back in to the shop I hear the hum of a tattoo machine and Jasper is standing at the desk. Alice hands him a soda and he hums in appreciation.

" I thought you skipped out on me." He says to me handing me the filled out paperwork.

"Not at all I have checked out your work online I was hoping you would be free today and if not I would have waited for an appointment. I don't run scared it's not in my nature." I look up and him and meet his eyes. He grins wide at me teeth and all.I look down and sign my name. I am shaking from head to toe I always feel this way before I get tattooed I love the art but hate the process of getting tattooed.

"Right this way my lady." Jasper says in a surprisingly good English accent holding his arm out toward his door. Luckily I have worn a dress today and it will be a cold walk home with no leggings but a dress will do.

"Okay well pants off and hop up." Jasper says patting his chair. His tray already has everything out on his table.

"Does that usually work for you? Take off you pants I mean it's not very original and you're an artist after all." I tell him kicking off my boots and pulling my pants off. I hear his breath hitch and I don't look up because I am not usually so brazen but the knowledge that he likes the way I look makes me this way.

"Not that I have never used it as a pick up but maybe I should try sometime." He says to me. The chair is leather and cold against my skin. I suck in a breath at the coldness on my legs.

"I know its cold but once we start tattooing you will warm up. Did you get yourself something with some sugar in it?" He asks grabbing the hand-drawn stencil that he took off my picture he is a fabulous artist he capture all of the small details that I put in it.

"Yup I did this isn't my first go around," I say to him pointing to the OJ that I have. He nods at me in reply and it's odd to have this comfort with someone I just met is odd.

"Thank you for bringing in an original piece of art I mean that as a tattoo artist in NYC I get a lot of generic shit." He says pushing my dress up to my hip and slaps his gloves on grabs the antiseptic.

"Where on your thigh do you think? Emmett is putting your friends on about here." He says and points to a place on my leg. I take and point to a place a little higher and he nods. He sprays that place and rubs it with a paper towel I jump a little because the antiseptic is cold. He puts the stencil over the place on my thigh and looks up at me confirming that its right and I nod. He presses it down slowly making sure that there are no wrinkles and runs his hand over it a few times. He leaves it on and rolls back to his tray and starts shaking blues.

"I am going to mix up some different blues to blend once I have the outline done. If you're doing well after the outline and you want to continue then we will." He says to me raising his eyebrow.

"I love shading so I will hold out for that." I say and he shuts his eyes for a second and smirks. I grab my phone and ear buds loud music is what I need because I don't like the sound of needle to skin.

"Lets get this show on the road then." He says reaching over and starts pulling on the stencil. He finishes and points to the mirror I hop up holding my dress up so I can see the stencil and I don't smudge it.

"Perfect Jasper." I can see what it is going to be and I can't wait. I get back up on the table with my orange juice in hand.

"I may fall asleep fair warning and my music is super loud so pinch me or something if your worried." I say and he nods at me hitting the paddle on the floor making the machine buzz. He dips it in the ink and hits it again I pop my ear buds in and turn on some hard german rock because I don't like the sound of needle to skin. Jasper puts his gloved hand on my thigh and gives me a thumbs up and I give him one back and lay my head back and close my eyes.

Tap, tap yanking earbud out my eyes pop open to Rose standing over me. I must have fallen asleep.

"How in the hell are you sleeping through that? You are a freak of nature." Rose is almost shrieking at me. She wore a tunic and jeans so she has a tunic on that covers her butt.

"My leggings are in my bag doll put them on you will freeze out there," I tell her she is flushed and sweating.

"Grab the 7/11 bag I bought you peanut butter crackers you look a little pale." She does both and turns to show me the outline of her tattoo and I give her two thumbs up. I look down and Jasper is ungloved and his hair isn't in his hat anymore and it just goes over his shoulders.

"Sorry I had to go use the bathroom and take my hat off it got too hot in here." He says and grabs a pony tail holder off his desk throwing it up in a low ponytail in a few practiced pulls.

"Sounds good can I go use the facilities as well?" I asked wrapping my ear bud cord around my phone.

"Yep if you are still okay we can start shading." He says standing and reaching for my hand I am holding my dress up away from my thigh I know better that to jump up after getting tattooed it's a good way to puke or pass out.

"Down the hall to the left last door on the right." He says let me go once I am upright.

"Thanks," I say and walk down the hall my leg is going to be so sore tomorrow the muscle is already tight.

"Are you going to be pissed if I go home?" Rose says when I come out of the bathroom.

"No love I know your tired I will be there in a while I am going to get all the shading done if I can tonight. I will see you when I get home." I lean forward and kiss her cheeks because she looks beat and its because she is coming off of the adrenaline rush from the tattoo. She nods and walks back toward the front.

"Did your girlfriend go home?" Jasper says when I reenter his room.

"Huh," I ask because I am a little confused.

"Did your girlfriend that just got tattooed go home? I heard the front bell ring." Jasper says looking at me like I have lost my mind.

"She is going home this was her first tattoo and it has wiped her out. She is a friend and a girl but not of the dating type although she is hot she doesn't have the right parts for me." I tell him grabbing the candy out of the bag that I got from 7/11.

"Do you like Reese's?" I ask him and tilt the bag in his direction. He smiles up and me and reaches in the bag.

"These are the best." He says and takes one. I nod in agreement because he is right,

"I mixed these up for you from dark to light these are custom mixed these for you but wrote them down so when we touch up I know." I look over his shoulder at the colors and man they are vivid the good thing about being as pale as I am is that color shows up beautifully on my skin. I look down at Jaspers arm that he has across the tattoo chair and he has a beautiful black and grey hawk on his forearm. I reach out and touch it without a second thought.

"It was done in Seychelles Greece on my first deployment." He says as I run my finger across the skin.

"Sorry I wasn't trying to invade your personal space. It is just such a beautiful tattoo." I tell him and go to step back he reached out and took my hand.

"I don't mind its nice for someone to touch me for a change. And I have been touching you for hours now so no reason to be shy about repaying the favor." He winks at the end and I smile at him.

"If you are ready then let's get this going I am excited to see what this finished product looks like."

I hop up on the chair and fold dress up to where my panties are. Jasper sprays the ink and I flinch when he rubs it with a towel.

"That part always sucks I have hundreds of hours and that towel still sucks," Jasper says taking a second swipe.

"I have to admit that I would not have pegged you for an art major or a tattoo lover really. But I have to say you have been one of the easiest clients I have ever had I have been at this almost 10 years." Jasper says starting up his machine and getting the darkest shade on his tray.

"I plugged my phone in so now you will get to talk to me. I am not your normal art major I guess a lot of people when I was an undergrad had a different look on life than I do weird hair odd clothes but I majored in art because I love it. I also love tattooing and its what my dissertation is about, tattooing and the evolution of the art.

"I am going to need you to get that published and for everyone to get to reading that so that those of us with ink and our culture isn't so looked at sideways. Have you ever been to a tattoo convention?" Jasper asks moving on with the shading I watch with rapt attention because shading is so cool to watch for me.

"I haven't been yet I want to go one day," I tell him trying to pay attention but I am enjoying watching his progress.

"We are going to one in Chicago in the spring, you should go they are a lot of fun and for your research, you know," Jasper says smiling at me.

"Yeah I think that would be fun." I say back to him and we continue talking through my shading. It is the most comfortable I have ever been with other person right off the bat. The feeling is odd but pleasant.


	16. Meeting of the worlds

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

Jasper's birthday is next week and thank god calving season is over because holy crow that was a lot of work. But with Emmett's help we are planning one hell of a surprise for Jasper. Hopefully it goes off without a hitch he had a late appointment today so he isn't home yet and we have dinner reservations at a steak house. While we were at dinner Emmett would set up Jaspers surprise. I cut my hair to my shoulders at the beginning of summer it had thinned out with Chemo. I had it flat ironed tonight and my make up a little heavier than usual. I had on a lace open back and halter red dress. It cuts mid thigh and a pair of black lace LB's that Jasper loves as well. After months in jeans, working in dirt and mud it feels nice to dress up for my husband. I am sitting at the dining room table when he walks in and tossed his wallet on the entry table. He looks up after he shuts the door and he says nothing. However his eyes dilate and his mouth gapes.

"Hells Bells woman what ? Now you know I can't let you leave the house like this now can I. You look good enough to eat." He says walking toward further into the house and looking me up and down. I stand slowly and take a slow turn. I feel him before I make a full turn. His hands land on my hips and his lips touch my neck.

"You are every mans wet dream in this lace baby. I want to bend you over and fuck you right here." He whispers against my neck and my nipples tighten and my clit pulsates at the thought so I moan. We have both been so busy that sometimes sex doesn't happen as often as I would like.

"It's your birthday baby you can have whatever you like." I say to him turning my face toward him and bite on his ear lobe. He squats behind me and slides his hands up my dress and groans at me when he feels my bare ass and I have to moan at his touch. It's an erotic feeling when you get taken by a man like Jasper.

"No fucking panties wife and you wanted me to sit through dinner I can't wait to have you now. I am going to bend you over and show you what this does to me. " He grinds out and I know that his teeth are clinched he pushes the dress above my hips and bites my ass cheek making me squeal.

"I don't have to wear panties. I have a husband who wouldn't let anyone get close enough to see." I say looking back over my shoulder at him as he bites my shoulder he is unzipped and he has pulled his cock from his pants.

"You do have a husband who loves you. Now I am going to have you and then we can go to dinner." Jasper says and slams into me in one swift move and I scream out because he is bottomed out inside of me and harder than I think he has ever felt. He grabs my chin and turns my face toward him and kisses me hard enough to bruise my lips I am moaning into his mouth. Taking the hand that has been holding onto my hip and finds my clit.

"Fuck yes Jasper please." I say when he starts rubbing circles on my clit making my legs go weak. I am so close in such a quick amount of time is a testament to my husbands skills with my body.

"I need you to cum now you feel so fucking good.I will get inside you again when we get home baby but I want to cum inside you so bad." Jasper pants out never slowing his strokes. I am so close that it wont take much. Like he can hear my thoughts Jasper reaches up and pinching my nipples. I show my head back onto his shoulder and explode he stills inside me and lets me ride out my orgasm. He is so hard inside me when the fog clears I grind my ass back into him making him twitch inside me eliciting a moan from us both.

"You feel so good baby make me cum." Jasper says leaning his torso away from me putting his hands on my ass as I grind back and forth on him. I am bent over the table rocking back and forth on him moaning because he feels so good. He slaps my ass which I have to say just makes me hornier and he grabs my hips and slams into me over and over.

"Yes, baby yes fuck you feel so damn good I have to cum baby." He grinds out and I moan in answer. I love him like this raw and powerful fucking me like he cant think of anything else. We stand like this for a while before Jasper pulls out making me moan. After a quick clean up we drive to the steakhouse in ambient silence holding hands over the true console. Jasper has black slacks on and a red button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows tattoos showing and his hair slicked back. He looks delicious and he smirks at me from the drivers seat salaciously.

"There isn't a place to pull over and I would like to eat soon and not have to wait for my raging hard on to go down so don't look at me like that baby. By the way you look fucking amazing tonight I love seeing my art on your skin it's a fucking turn on to know it is all mine." I smirk at him as he says this and squeeze his hand.

"Forever." Is all I say in return. We get to the valet Jasper hands over keys and he waves the guy off of opening my door. Jasper grabs my door and stands right in from of me helping me from the truck. We get the ticket and go in the steak house it is beautiful we are lead into the cellar room. Jasper orders a drink and I order a tea and Jasper raises an eyebrow at me and I laugh.

"It is your birthday babe I want you to enjoy your drinks and dinner I will drive home." I tell him and the waitress returns and we order our food. This restaurant is gorgeous and has an almost erotic feel or maybe that is my exaggerated sex drive today. Sitting here with my sexy husband knowing that not even an hour ago he was deep inside me makes me hot.

"They're not going to sing to me right?" Jasper asks and he looks like her with a look that makes me laugh a little his face looks like he is going to puke or cry.

"No sir we don't sing." The waitress says to him with a lifted eyebrow making me laugh again. Jasper and the waitress cut their eyes at me and I have to bite my lip to not laugh harder. Dinner is delicious I have roasted chicken with carrots and mashed potatoes and the birthday boy has a prime ribeye with all the trimmings. We have a good dinner and while Jasper passes on dessert but I decide to have bananas foster and get an extra spoon. Jasper moves his chair closer to mine while we share the delicious dessert and he has a final drink and I have coffee. Tonight has been bliss and I hope that the surprise that we have planned at home will be a good one.

"I love you handsome happy birthday." I told Jasper leaning forward to kiss him short and sweet he reached up to run his hand down my cheek.

"I love you too baby and the best thing about this entire year has been you." He said holding my chin and kissing me again. I fight him for the bill insisting I am to pay it is his birthday. He finally gives in and lets me pay. But he does remind me that it's our money making me laugh.

"You look hot in your little dress and heels driving my truck." Jasper says from the passenger seat on our drive home from Austin. I smirk over at him and shake my head.

"You are incorrigible Mr. Whitlock. I am not wearing this dress or heels for me." I tell him and wink in his direction. It is not the whole truth really I do feel sexy which is for me but I want him to love being seen with me.

"Oh I know who its for and nothing makes a man feel better on his birthday than his sexy wife dressing up just for him to see. For me it is also seeing every man in that turn his head to see you as we walked by and knowing that you are all mine. I didn't think that I was territorial till you but that beautiful set of rings on your hand makes the caveman in me draw back some." He says smiling at me salaciously I know that look if he was driving he would be pulling over and screwing me.

"If all the men looked at me then let me reassure you husband that women blush and fan themselves in your presence. I could be jealous but I know every ridge and valley of your body better than anyone else and I will be the only woman you are with so I have no reason to be jealous of anyone." I say speeding up as we hit the road that leads us home. I am getting nervous I talked to Emmett and Rose while Jasper was in the bathroom at the restaurant. We get home and the house lights were off but I knew that it was not empty. Jasper helped me out of the truck and pinned me to the door his hands holding my face and kissing me until we have to pull apart in order to take a breath.

"I don't know what I have done in this life to deserve you but I will thank God everyday for you." He says resting his forehead against mine. I close my eyes and send up my prayer as well.

"I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you and I think that god made us for one another. You are the kindest most giving person that I have ever met you deserve all the happiness in the world. I plan on making it my goal in life to do everything I can to make you happy. Let's go inside your birthday is not over yet husband." I say to him trying not to tear up at the calm look on his face. Jasper has days where he is not here he is at war and those days break my heart, he has nightmares and flashbacks. He has had help and still goes to a therapist twice a month but to see him calm and centered is always a beautiful thing. Jasper takes me by the hand and pulls me toward the door unlocking it quickly and pushing through the door. The volume of the house explodes as the lights all flip on.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY." Is the exclamation heard most often. Jasper turns to me and his eyes are wide and glossed. I smile at him and I am happy that he is surprised and this makes all the worry was worth it. Momma comes to me first hugging and kissing me on my cheek and then pops. Some of Jaspers friends from the service made the trip down thanks to Emmett. He was ecstatic to see all his friends. Momma and pops leave shortly after we arrive and the party then ensue. We had no plans tomorrow.

"I can't believe you did this all for me baby." Jasper whispers against my ear with his arm locked around my hips as we stand on the deck off the back of the house. I kiss his lips and just smile at him. He turns and continues his talking with his friends.

"You look so very happy my friend." Rose says from her spot beside me. I look towards her and smile because I have never been so happy.

"I am happy I don't know what else this life has in store for us but I am in as long as I have him." I say to her as we stand in the doorway watching the party. Jasper is laughing jovially his cheeks are red and I don't think I have ever seen him this happy.

"Come with me I have something to show you." Rose says pulling me back inside. Jasper looks up just then and I point inside the house and he nods to me. Rose and I go in my room and shut the door.

"Wow this is real?" I ask in a little bit of disbelief at the small piece of paper that Rose has pulled from her puree and handed to me. I look up at her to see her grin. Holy shit is all that runs through my mind and I grab her in a tight hug. The door behind me opens and I am teary for my best friend.

"I guess the cat is out of the bag. I knew you couldn't keep a secret." The timbered voice says from behind me and Rose shakes her head. I pull back and watch Emmett walk right for her and wraps his arms around her and kisses the top of her head.

"You did this ya big lug but as long as she is happy I wont have to feed you to the pigs. I know how to do that just so you are aware." I say pushing him back and he acts like I am the hulk and he stumbles back looking hurt. I laugh at his playing around.

"I am just as happy as you are and no feeding him to the pigs." Rose says patting Emmett. I hug him and I hug Rose again for good measure. I am happy for them both.

"You guys were in on this whole thing weren't you." I hear Jasper says coming in the bedroom and Emmett nods slapping Jasper on the back.

"Guilty and we are also guilty of helping with your present." Emmett says smiling and handing Jasper the envelope.

"You didn't have to get me anything the party was plenty." I hear Jasper say and Emmett laugh. Jasper sits down on the bed staring at the paperwork in his hands tears spilling over his cheeks. I sit down next to him and he puts his arm around me. He looks up at Emmett and Rose who are staring.

"It's to much y'all I can't accept this." Jasper says pushing the paper back at Emmett who has his arms crossed over his chest. Emmet looks impassive and Rose has a smarmy smirk on her lips.

"Nah man I owe you my life. If it had not been for you then I would have never made it home from the sand bowl. I wouldn't have the chance at becoming a father in the spring." Emmett says pushing the paper away and when the words sink in Jasper's eyes snap to Rose and he jumps up and yanks her into a hug making her squeal.

"Don't get all mushy on me now Whitlock I am counting on your steady head through this. Because Bella is a sap and so is that big lug." Rose tells him smiling. My best friend is having a baby and I couldn't be happier for her and maybe a little jealous too. Jasper and I have talked about kids but never as in us having children.

"I can't believe y'all did this all of this. I am not sire why I've done in this life for any one of you but I am thankful I have you." Jasper says he looks confused I hate that he doesn't see how amazing he is. I don't know what else I could do to convince him of what we al see in him.

"Bella, I need you to teach this man here that he is worth all of us doing everything for him. We love him and he better fucking get used to it." Emmett says as if he is talking to me but he is looking at Jasper. We join the party shortly there after and Jasper introduces me to all of his old friends. It is a good side of him that I don't see often.

"I fucking love you Isabella I hope you know that you are my world." Jasper says to me wrapping his arms around me while we are in bed.

"I love you too baby I hope that you have had a great birthday I have a present for you but you have to wait until tomorrow." I tell him and shorty after I hear his snores. A few of the guys stayed the night so when I get up the next morning I get fully dressed before I leave the room. I make coffee and start to make some pancakes before I hear anyone moving around.

"Good Morning baby." Jasper says kissing my cheek.

"Good Morning to you too." I say flipping over pancakes.

"So what do we have on the docket today wife? I know Tyler and Jones wanted to have lunch today but aside from that I am not sure." Jasper says picking up his mug and sipping.

"Whatever you want I have a present for you at the new shop which we can do whenever." I say I am looking forward to some alone time while he is out with the guys.

"Okay well how about this we ride in together. I will drop you at Rose's when I get Emmett and pick you up on the way home?" Jasper says and I nod a little disappointed to not get to be alone but I know Rose and I can totally be alone together. After I finish breakfast everyone gets up and I bow out for a run I need to clear my head Jasper looks at me questioningly but lets it go. I take off on the trail that Jasper and I have carved out over the months walking and running it. I am probably the best shape of my life but it is fucking hot and it's only 8 am. I get four miles in ad have to stop because I am panting like a dog. I put my hands on my knees and breathe in through my nose and out through my mouth. The tap on my shoulder scares the shit out of me I scream and jerk up.

"Fuck." Edward yells out when the back of my skull makes contact with his jaw. My head says fuck too for multiple reasons I am seeing spots from the impact of my head and his jaw.

"Yeah fuck that hurt who the hell told you to sneak up on people like that." I say a little more sharp than I intend to but I was frustrated when I came out here to run and this doesn't help

"Sorry I yelled your name you looked like you weren't okay so I wanted to check on you is all." Edward says taking a step back and raising his hands. He looks worried and I know that he is just just as uncomfortable with me as I am with him.

"No, I am sorry for snapping I am a little extra bitchy this morning. Thank you for checking on me I need to get home." I say and put my earbuds back in and I take off for the house.

"Baby are you okay?" Jasper asks while I am getting dressed after my shower. By the time I made it home I was a dripping mess. I had forgotten a bottle of water in my desperation to get out of the house and had to guzzle one down before I was coherent.

"Yeah I will be just a little stressed. I'm sorry it is your birthday weekend and I am being a bitch." I tell him and wince when I hit the sore spot with the brush.

"I ran into Edward on my run well I head butted him is more like it." I say trying to lighten the mood which is a gross miscalculation.

"What the hell did he want?" Jasper bites out. He looks angry and I hate that I have said anything at all.

"To make sure I was okay I got a little winded out there." I say with a shrug. I was trying to blow off the fact that he freaked me out.

We drive into the city and it's not our normal comfortable silence and I know we are both in a mood. Pulling up to the little building with the sold sign in the window. Emmett bought for him and Jaspers tattoo shop / art gallery. This was Jasper's present last night I had actually scoped out the property for Emmett in the first place. It was a nice little brick building in an up and coming neighborhood.


	17. Ups and downs

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

AN; Thank y'all for letting me know the chapter was jacked. I am not sure what happened it was fine when I submitted it hopefully it works this time. Thank you as always for reading only 2- 3 more chapters I think. When I originally wrote this chapter 17 was it but I have added and taken away since then. So I hope that you all enjoy this chapter. xoxo - B

The walls are painted a deep blue with the sun barely visible on the horizon casting a glow out over the water. There is a big sail ship that is skidding across the water sails out. I put so many hours into this one wall but the wall adjacent to that has the shop logo. Jasper turns on me after a long he has tear welled up in his eyes.

"Happy birthday husband." I say as he grabs me and wraps his arms around me jerks me off my feet and spins me in a circle. I laugh out as we spin I love seeing him carefree like this.

"Thank you baby. This is amazing when have you been doing this huh?" Jasper says burying his face in my neck. I thread my fingers through his hair and tilt his head back.

"I have been working here instead of Frank's I actually quit Frank's when Emmett bought this place he asked me to oversee the re-model. Sorry I hid it from you but I hope it was a good surprise I love you." I say and peck him quickly. He squeezes me slightly and pecks me back.

"This is the best birthday I have ever had. I can't wait to christen this room as well." He says and kisses me again. He bites my lip and slides me down his body and we stand wrapped in each other for a few minutes.

"Awe are you and Rosie going to have a play date?" Emmett says walking toward me on the sidewalk. I bump him when he gets to me on the sidewalk making him laugh loudly.

"We have had many a play date that you would love to know about." I say and his steps halt and he rounds on me. I wink at him and walk into the house.

"Hey love I just ruffed Emmett's feathers real well don't be surprise he asks about girl on girl later." I tell her and wrap her in a hug. She is smiling widely at me when we pull away from one another.

"What in the hell did you say Swan?" Rose quips at me raising an eyebrow.

"Damn I don't even get a hello. Your boyfriend had some joke about a play date and I told him we had a few he would like to know something about." I tell her and she starts laughing and has a hard time catching her breath.

"Oh lord he is going to be so freaked by the time he gets home but know he will ask Jasper." She says after she catches her breath. Emmett will be in a state by the time gets home that makes me happy.

"Thats fine Jasper asked that question the night we met." I say and Rose bursts into another fit of giggles.

Rose and I spend the rest of the afternoon in a comfortable silence I read the book I brought with me the last in a series with the lord himself. Rose is sitting in an armchair with her feet propped up and a motherhood book in her lap and suddenly my relaxed mood snaps. I hate to be jealous of Rose because I love her and I am happy that she is happy but I am mad and jealous in the same breath. I get up from the couch and walk to the bathroom I want to cry in peace. I sit on the toilet with my hand in my mouth to stop the sobs that are racking my body.

Summer ends and fall begins everything for us trucks along and I try to ignore the fact that even though I haven't been on birth control in almost 9 months I am not pregnant. I try to push down the fact that my beautiful best friend is happily pregnant. I didn't think I would be so bitter but I am. I avoid Rose which is hard since her boyfriend and I work together.

"Good morning beautiful." Jasper says pulling me to him.

"Good morning handsome." I say to him turning over and cuddling in against his chest. He runs his hands on my back and rests his cheek against the top of my head. We lay there in perfect comfort until my alarm goes off and we both groan.

"I don't want to move this is my happy place and Emmett is all baby crazy at work it makes me kinda want to vomit." I say rolling my eyes and Jasper chuckles a little.

"It will happen for us eventually baby think about the fact that in the last year you beat cancer lets enjoy just us until it's not just us." Jasper says to me kissing me.

"Fuck, Fuck, Fuck." I yell nocking over the easel with the painting that I have been working on for weeks that I just can't seem to get right. Emmett opens the door with a look of concern.

"You okay in here smalls?" Emmett says to me and I am not I can't paint and the only other stress relief I can do alone is run. I have run as much as possible lately I am running ten or so miles a day. Physically I am doing well but mentally I am struggling pretty hard.

"Yep just a shit mood and this damn painting is not coming out the way I want. I need to just go home and pack for California but I don't want to." I say picking up the canvas, my paints and brushes cleaning up.

"Anything I can do to help? I notice that you have been off the last couple weeks but I don't know what to do. I have been escaping here because Rose is losing her damn mind on a daily basis." He says shaking his head. I have to chuckle because imagining Rose throwing shit at Emmett is amusing.

"No, I just need to get my head out of my ass I will get it together." I tell him and walk out to the kitchen to wash my brushes and plate.

"Okay smalls well if you need anything let me know." Emmett says patting me on the back and grabs a coke from the fridge and walks out. His nickname for me I found very irritating when he first started it but he was a giant of a man so smalls wasn't an insult it was just the truth my 5'4" was small compared to him.

 _I am on my way home. Are you home? I love you - B_

 _I am just finishing up packing. See you soon I love you too. - J_

I drive home listening to my radio rather loud I don't hear my phone ringing. I see the 4 missed calls when I pick my phone up out of the cup holder. Mom, mom, Rose, Jasper about the time I shut the door and make my way toward the house Jasper comes bounding out the door.

"Are you okay?" Jasper asks as he decends the steps toward me.

"Uh yeah I just looked at my phone I was blasting 100 monkeys in the truck." I say back to him finally looking up. His eyes are wide and his hair is a mess. It looks like he has been running his hands through his hair.

"What is going on? Mom and Rose called me too sorry for worrying y'all I was fine." I tell him now feeling a little guilty for worrying everyone. But I left Rose's only 30 minutes ago I am not entirely sure why everyone would worry.

"Baby you need to call your mom back something has happened with your dad." Jasper says and my stomach drops and my heart beats harder. Jasper takes my cup and jacket and I call my mom walking to the porch and sitting in the rocker.

"Oh Bella, thank god you called me back. Honey you need to come home your father was ambushed at work he is in surgery now." My moms voice cracks as she finishes up and I don't know what to say or really how to feel yet but I have to get home.

"Okay mom I will be there as soon as possible keep me updated I love you." I tell her in the phone I go in the house and Jasper is on the phone.

"No, I have to cancel my spot my wife's father was shot in the line of duty and we have to go home." Jasper says and then pauses to listen to the reply he is pacing in the living room I walk right to him and hug his middle burying my face in his chest. Jasper wraps his arm roundly shoulder and holds me to his chest.

"Yes, yes thanks I appreciate your time. My partner Emmett will be there. Thank you have a good day." He says and hangs up and drops his phone. Holding tighter with both arms and running his hands in my hair.

"I called and changed our flights we have a red eye to Portland tonight and I got us a rental car. I knew you would want to go home. I am so sorry baby." Jasper says against my hair I nod I know if I open my mouth I will cry. I just want him to hold me.

"Let's go take a nap we don't have to go to the airport for a few hours." Jasper says pulling me toward our room. I sit on the bed, take my shoes off and lay down trying to hold back the tears. I send my mom a text telling her our plan. Jasper climbs into bed and pulls me towards him.

"I love you Jasper thank you for taking care of all of this." I tell him as I hold his hands around my middle and cry. I don't know where I would be without this man and I don't want to know.

"I love you too Isabella and I will always do whatever I can for you." He says kissing my cheek and I settle against him and cry myself to sleep.

Hospitals are one of my least favorite places on the planet and the fact that my dad, my superman is in there some where dying makes me not want to get out of the car. Jasper is sitting in the drivers seat looking forward waiting for my cues but I don't want to go in. Traveling here had gone perfectly really simple and to the point the fact that I don't want to be here making no real difference.

"Okay we should go in." I say and my voice sounds normal but my gut is in knots. I take Jaspers hand on our way into the hospital he brings my hand to his lips. His quiet strength is what I love most about him in this moment. He is holding me up and cheering me on without one word and I need that.

"Your Father sustained four GSW's two to the abdomen, one to the shoulder and one the right hip. His injuries are serious and he has had one surgery yesterday and hopefully we can get him in for a second today if he is stable enough. He has a long recovery ahead of him but we are hopeful that all will go well."

Seeing dad with a tube in his mouth and knowing that he is alive purely because of the steading beeping of the monitor. Jasper stops behind me putting his hand on my hip I know that he is just letting me know he is here. Mom went to the cafeteria I am assuming so Jasper and I can see dad. I grab Jaspers hands and wrap them around me and lean back into him I just need to feel his warmth.

"It will be okay baby we are here now. I got you." He says in my ear kissing my neck and I nod. I cant believe that this happened to my dad but it did and here we are.

"It will be whatever it is supposed to be. I love you thank you for making this all happen." I say turning in his arms and wrapping my arms around his neck. He looks handsome even though we have yet to really sleep. I love this man.

"Till death baby." He whispers into my hair and kisses me.

Jasper

Watching someone you love fight for their life may be the hardest thing you ever do however watching the person who is your life waste away in grief is so much worse. I had to go home after 2 weeks in Washington I have work that needs to be done and can only be put off so long. Leaving Bella in Washington was hard but seeing her on video chat wasting away is harder. Charlie has been in the hospital for a little over a month and I have been home 2 weeks alone and it is hell. I am sleeping at the shop or on moms couch because I don't want to go home without my wife.

"Hey baby how are you today?" I say answering the video call from my wife. She smiles lightly at me.

"Hey handsome I have had worse days but I have news that I couldn't wait to share." Her smile gets a little bigger and my heart stutters at her smile I miss her and I haven't seen her smile in so long.

"Oh yeah go ahead and make my day baby it has been a shit one." I say trying to smile at her but I cant seem to muster it. I miss my wife and we have a some cattle get sick and that is money lost.

"I am sorry handsome but I will be coming home. Dad woke up today he is confused and in pain but he's okay. I booked a flight for day after tomorrow." She says smiling at me widely.

"Thank god that was exactly what I wanted to hear beautiful." I tell her smiling. I check the time but I don't have a client for another half an hour. We talk for a few more minutes and then hang up. I am happy she is coming home the shop is swamped lately. We had someone break in while I was in Washington and since then a brick threw our front window. Edward is helping my dad on the ranch while I am busting ass at the shop. My next client is a friend of mine from the service he is here getting more care at the hospital here he was injured in a firefight about 6 months ago. I am tattooing the names of his fallen marines under the fallen soldier that I tattooed on his skin about a month ago. Alistair means a lot to me he was a doctor over there the surgeon that dug the bullets out of my body and saved my life. His convoy hit an IED and now he is missing a hand and he has battle scars inside that he will fight to heal his whole life. If I can aid in his healing I will.

"Hey brother how's it hanging?" I look up and Alistair is standing in my door. I stand up and give him a bro hug as Bella calls it.

"Hey fucker hard and to the left shit is the same here. What about you?" I ask making him chuckle it is the same conversation that we have had many times over the years. It is comforting to know that not everything morphs in the darkness.

"Fucking alive man alive ready to put this ink in my skin and move on. Maybe one day I can be like you have a wife and a life not surrounded by recovery." He says and I can hear the twinge of sadness.

"You will brother just remember you are alive." I say moving to my seat and he follows me getting up on the chair we spend the next two hours with him telling me the stories of each man whose name I permanently etch into his skin. It is cathartic to sit with him and hear the stories of American heroes my brothers in arms.

"My wife will be home later this week come on over on Friday for dinner. I need her back a few days before company. She has been in Washington with her folks." I say to him winking making him laugh out.

"Yeah man can I bring the lady I have been seeing?" Alistair says to me putting his shirt on over the tattoo that I just cleaned and covered. I go home after work with groceries to get everything ready for Bella to come home.

"Hey shithead she will be here in a few hours huh?" Emmett bellows from his place against my door facing at the shop.

"Yes, asshat she will and I will be at home tomorrow and not here with your ugly mug." I say to him making me chuckle. I am excited to see my woman and to take the day off.

"You get it man look Rose wants you and Bella to come over on Sunday for dinner." He says as a matter of fact.

"I will ask the wife and if she wants to go then we will be there." I say to him and he nods at me and walks off. The day passes quick I do paperwork for the business itself reorder supplies and even check out a convention in Austin that is coming up in the New Year. The drive to the airport is a pain in the ass but Bella is here and I need to get her in my arms. I pull up to the curb where she is standing and jump out of the truck and run around the back. I grab Bella and pull her against me.

"Holy shit woman I have missed your beautiful face." I pull her face toward me and kiss her till the asshole behind me is honking. I let her go and help her in the car. I jump back into my side of the truck.

"I have missed you too handsome." Bella says pushing the console up and sliding into the middle seat. She lays her head on my shoulder and sighs I have my hand resting on her leg. We ride home without saying much just being in the truck with her is enough for me.

"I need a shower join me?" Bella says when we get home I nod and she takes my hand and leads me to the bathroom.

" I have missed you like crazy I am glad dad is okay now but I am more glad to home I think." Bella says as she leans forward and presses her lips hard into mine. My girl is feisty tonight and I am digging it. I hold the back of her head as we kiss and my other hand goes to her ass pulling her against me making her moan. We spring apart and start to shed clothes she is standing in just her thong turning on the water in the shower.

"Are you trying to kill me baby? All that ass bent over." I say laying a slap to her ass before she can stand up she moans spurring me so I do it again.

"Not trying to kill you at all husband but trying to get you to fuck me yes that is exactly what I am trying to do." Bella says looking at me over her shoulder. I grab her thong on both sides and pull it ripping the fabric. I step in the shower stall pulling her with me and pushing her to the wall and slamming my lips to hers.

"Oh baby I will fuck you till you cant walk." I say when I take my lips from hers and attach them to her right nipple biting down till she moans and shoves her hands in my hair. I switch to the other nipple making sure I give it the same attention. I lift Bella up as I stand and she wraps her legs around my waist and her breath hitches as my cock rubs against her clit. I bite her bottom lip as she grinds against me making my cock twitch. I kiss her lips again and again before I slide myself deep inside her nice and slow making us both groan.

"Jasper yes please harder please." Bella says throwing her head back and I oblige her slowly I am sliding slowly in and out enjoying the feeling of her warmth wrapped around me squeezing me tight. I reach between us and start to rub her clit and speed up my strokes making her gasp and her eyes pop open.

"Does that feel good baby? Do you like my cock slamming into you?" I say to her slamming into her hard I can hear the harsh slap of skin. I wont last long like this she feels to good.

"Yes, Jasper I am almost there please cum with me I need you." Bella says barely above a whisper.

"Yes, ma'am I am happy to oblige." I say against her ear holding her hips and slamming into her until she clinches around me screaming and I empty myself deep inside her.


	18. Runaway from the pain

An: One more chapter after this y'all and that is all for this story. I hope yall enjoy this chapter. Thank you everyone who let me know that the last chapter was all jacked up. I have no idea what happened but I appreciate y'all letting me know.

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

Bella

Bang, bang, bang.

Bang, bang, bang.

Uhhh what the hell is that? The banging continues and I roll over to see the clock it's only noon but what the hell am I doing still asleep. I spot a note and no husband which isn't surprising because he has been up before dawn working the ranch his dad fell from a horse a couple weeks ago. My head is foggy I have been asleep 12 or so hours and I am not sure why Jasper didn't wake me up.

Bang, bang, bang.

"Fuck okay I'm coming." I yell and sit up. I snatch my robe off the chair and walk to the front door. I don't look through the peep hole which is a big mistake. Because when I yank the door open and there stands Angela Webber with a pistol in her hand. I am not sure what to do or say.

"Get in the fucking house." Angela says walking forward through the open door. I walk backward by instinct I don't want to get shot. My head that was foggy seconds before is crystal clear.

"Oh look at cute happily married to the man that was mine first. Do you have a baby in there yet little girl?" She says pointing to my flat stomach. I am watching her waiting for an opportunity to disarm her.

"Answer me." She screams lifting the gun to my head. I close my eyes and try to thin of anyway out of this.

"No, no baby I don't think that I can have a baby. What are you doing here Angela?" I say to her hoping that I can keep her talking. So maybe just maybe I wont die today.

"My life is ruined and it is your fault. You came here and moved right into the life that I should have. You live in the house that I should be living in. You are not worthy of him you can't even give him a child what kind of woman can't give her husband a child shame on you." Angela says pacing in front of me her pupils are huge and she is watching her feet rambling. I see Edward come through the door out of the corner of my eye and I try not to react but I guess Angela had seen him as well. She jerks her head in his direction raising the gun again in my direction and looking at him. I look to them and he is looking at her. I stand statue still I don't dare move.

"Angela what are you doing here?" Edward says to her as he walks slowly toward her. She shakes her head and points the gun toward him making him stop in his tracks. He holds his hands up to show her they are empty and moves slowly toward her.

"Why are you here? This is your fault to if you would have just left me alone and let me be sad then she wouldn't be here. I would be with Jasper and we would be happy." Angela says her voice breaking. Tears are flowing down her face and she is visibly shaking.

"I am sorry Angela that nothing turned out the way you wanted. That is my fault but not Bella's she didn't do it." Edward says not taking his eyes off of Angela. I step back slowly sliding my feet not even picking up my feet.

"If you don't get out Edward I will kill you too. I don't want to do that. I don't I loved you once and Jasper will be sad if you die but he will get over it. I will kill you Edward if you get in my way." Angela says. I am watching her face as she talks to Edward I am close to where Jasper keeps the gun.

"I still love you Angela I always have. I didn't mean to hurt you or Jasper but I have been in love with you since we were all kids. Please put down the gun and let me get you some help and maybe we can start over. But killing me or Bella is not the answer." Edward is talking her down. I take the gun out take aim and click the safety. I shoot and then a second shot goes off. I hit the floor out of self preservation. When I look around I see a pool of blood around Edward. I jump up and run to get my phone and dial 911. The dispatcher stays on the phone with me until the sheriffs pull up.

"Baby Baby. This is my fucking house and my wife is in there." I hear Jasper before he comes running through the front door. I am sitting on the couch with a trashcan between my feet. I have thrown up like 10 times the paramedic said it was shock but I refused medical attention.

"I am fine Jasper I am fine just shaken up." I say to him as he sits next to me and runs his hand through my hair. It is a relief to see his face because for a minute there I wasn't sure I would ever see him again.

"Is Edward okay? I held a towel on him until they got here he was talking until the end." I say and I am getting hysterical I have never seen that much blood. Angela didn't wake up but I only shot her in the leg and she shot Edward in the chest.

"They rushed him into surgery from what I know. But lets get you into the room baby you are covered in blood." Jasper says trying to get me up I shake my head. I cant walk right now I am dizzy and I think I have to throw up right now.

"Sir y'all need to go this is an active crime scene." The sheriff says approaching us I nod. I try to stand and Jasper has to catch me when I tip over.

"Can I pack us a bag first? My wife is covered in blood." Jasper says holding me to his side.

"Yeah just make it quick and go out the back please." The sheriff says again and Jasper and I walk to the bedroom I run to the bathroom fall to my knees and puke. I have nothing left in my stomach so I am dry heaving and crying. I think this is shock thats what this has to be I shot someone today and I could have died, Edward could die. Leaving the house is a blur Jasper and I get to his parents and he gets me undressed and into the shower.

"It's okay baby. Let's get you clean okay. You're okay I am here I will take care of you." I hear Jasper say as he tilts my head back into the water I gasp when the water hits me.

"I am sorry Jasper I thought I was protecting him I just wanted her to stop. I shot her but didn't want to kill her." I say gasping in between words trying to catch my breath.

"You did so good baby. So good you protected you and Edward. I am so glad you are okay baby I love you so much." Jasper says rubbing shampoo into my scalp. I cry while he does it and he just talks to me as he helps me wash all the blood off of my body the stress and puking I am exhausted.

"Lets get you in bed baby." Jasper says turning off the water. I grab the towels he has set out handing him one. I sit down on the toilet and try to get the shaking under control.

"I just woke up at noon what time is it anyway?" I look at Jasper he is more pale than usual. I hate that this has happened and that I am to weak to handle this on my own.

"It was around 3 when I got to you. But we don't have to sleep but I want to hold you baby you could have been killed by that vindictive bitch I just want to hold you and make sure your real for a little while. My mom called me to tell me there was an ambulance and cops on the property. I didn't know what had happened till I got here and when I heard the cops talking and saw the blood it brought back a lot of old shit." Jasper says pulling me to my feet and wrapping his arms around me.

"I am sorry handsome I didn't even think of any of that I am a little out of it lets go to bed." I tell Jasper laying my head on his chest. He pulls back and turns me toward the bedroom. I get into a t-shirt of Jaspers while gets his briefs on and gets in bed. I lay my head on his chest and he wraps his arms around me.

"I didn't think I would see you again Jasper I don't know how to feel right now. I shot her Jasper and I could have killed her if I wanted to. She came here for you she was mad because I took you from her how I wasn't a real woman because we don't have kids yet. Everything she said cut open every soft spot I have. Edward was trying to save us both I think he loves her its why I didn't make it a kill shot." I say and he is rubbing my hair and kisses my head.

"She is lucky I wasn't here because I would not have hesitated to kill her she had my wife and you are always going to be my number one concern.I didn't think that she was unstable. I wouldn't have left you here. I wonder if she is behind the break in and shit at the shop." I hear him say but he is saying these underwater which makes no sense at all. But I am warm and its dark so I will ask him about why he sounds weird later.

I wake up to a cold bed and I can hear my husband talking. I didn't know that I fell asleep.

"Yeah ma I will come up when Bella wakes up she was in shock before we got into bed. The cops have left the house but I am not sure if she will want to go back. Yeah mom I am glad that he is doing good. Yeah we are at your house. Okay see you soon then." I can only hear his side of the conversation so he must be on the phone. I should get up but I don't want to I am curled into the blanket. Jasper gets back in bed kissing my cheek I suddenly just want him. I turn over in his arms and seal my lips to his. Our kiss escalades quickly as always and Jasper pulls away and pulls his shirt over my head.

"We don't have to baby but if we are we need to get to it because my parents will be home shortly." He says to me and he is already panting and his cock is rock solid against my leg.

"Please Jasper make love to me make it go away." I moan out as Jasper pushes his briefs down and rolls me onto my back kissing across my jaw nipping my skin and kissing down my throat, chest and across my breasts. He leans up and kisses my mouth sliding his cock against my opening and moaning when he finds me wet.

"You are always so ready for me aren't you baby. I am always hard for you too baby always ready to slide deep inside you." He says and slides deep inside me. I arch my back and Jasper slides his arms underneath me.

"Oh Jasper I feel so full when your inside me so good." I say to him as he starts rocking back and forth over and over send shock waves through my body he is rocking into me hard enough to slide me backwards. Jasper moves and holds my face in his hands grinding his pelvic bone against my clit over and over until I break into a million pieces and he groans into my lips as he cuts inside me. He pulls out of me and flops on his back pulling me against him.

"I love you Jasper." I say to him and hold onto him like he is going to disappear.

We go to the hospital the next morning and my mind is a little more clear but my body is still on strike. I am sick to my stomach every time I open my eyes. Edward is in a regular room and asleep when we get there his shoulder is bandaged up but other than that he looks good.

"You going to stand there and stare at me like a zoo animal or give me a hug?" Edward says not even opening his eyes. I laugh a little and so does Jasper I sit next to Edward and grab his hand. He took a bullet for me which is surprising.

"You don't get to hug my wife even after you saved her life. But thank you for saving her life I will never be able to repay you for." Jasper says sitting on his brother bed both men have teary eyes. I go to move and let them have their moment.

"I am sorry she came after you Bella when I realized she was gone I tracked her phone. I didn't think she would come after you. She is sick which isn't an excuse but she needs help. I have been trying to make sure she stays sober but I fell asleep." Edward says to me and turns to Jasper. The thought that he has been watching her 24/7 to make sure she is okay.

"I was paying a debt to you that I have owed to you for a long time. I was a real bastard and I saved your wife because I love you both and you deserve to be happy both of you. You owe me nothing just love her bro thats all I need from you." Edward says and I stand and walk out of the room. I am in tears I don't know Edward well but he saved my life.

Edward is in the hospital a few more days and then is sent home. All of us are living in the house with mama and pop. It is a little much for me and I make my escape to run or draw often. Jasper is working a lot as pop isn't back to work yet.

"Mom how is everything?" I call my mom while I am resting out by the lake. I have a cramp in my side and I need a distraction. Life is stressful and I miss home and the simplicity that

"Oh hey belly everything is good here your dad is recovering well and being a complete ass he is tired of being at home. I may send him to you if you're not more careful young lady." Mom jokes in my ear and I laugh. Having my dad here would be a nice distraction.

"Yeah because dad would love staying with Jasper's parents then send him on down. I need to get my act together and get the house back together so I can move home with my husband." I say sighing the cramp in my side isn't letting up.

"I will send him whenever you want then it's a tag your it kinda situation. I had him you will have him." Mom says and we joke a little longer and then hang up. I walk back to the house slowly and don't realize I am walking to my house until I am standing in front of the giant blood stain on my carpet I sigh because it makes my home stink so I get to work I open all the windows and start to clean up the blood. I am startled when my phone rings.

"Yeah." I answer the phone not looking away from my task. Not entirely sure on how long I have been cleaning. But when I look around the floor is clear of blood.

"Where are you? Mom said you went on a run hours ago I just got home and she is worried." Jasper says over the speaker. I am over living in a whole house full of people.

"I came home I don't want to live up there anymore not that I don't love your family but I like being naked and I can't do that up there I need for it to be us." I say to him and i know I am being short and bitchy.

"I can't wait I will be there in 15." Jasper says and I hang up. I go back to cleaning but this time it's the wall that is splattered with blood. The knowledge that I shot someone is overwhelming. Jasper finds me panting on the floor.

"Are you okay? What the hell happened baby? Is everything okay?" Jasper says squatting in front of me. I nod and move to hug him tipping him back and we both land on the floor. I start laughing and so does Jasper.

"I cleaned up the blood. But I can still see it that isn't normal is it." I ask Jasper once our laughter stops. Jasper rolls over onto of me and kisses my nose.

"It is normal to have flash backs after a traumatic event. When I came back from Iraq I punched a guy in the grocery store when he snuck up on me. I didn't realize that I was home and safe until they put me in the back of the police cruiser." Jasper tells me looking me right in the eyes. I tear up at the thought of my man so lost in a world that he knew. He puts his hand on my cheek and kisses me.

"No tears for me baby I am healed up. But maybe we should get you cleaned up you smell like bleach." He says to me and kisses me again. We finish cleaning and get the broken furniture into the truck. After a lengthy shower we get go into town and get takeout. A night in our home watching crap movies and snuggling on the couch.

The next morning we get up and get the furniture take to the dump. I pass out on the way home and Jasper wakes me up when we are back. But were not home we are sitting on a dirt road on the crest of a hill. I look through the windshield and the scene out of it is amazing. Bluebonnets cover the ground and a huge live oak. I turn to Jasper and he has a smirk on his face dimples and all. I smile back at him.

"Come on lets take a little while with just us baby. Some time outside of everything going on. Just you and I lets be just us." Jasper says pulling me out of the car behind him.

"That sounds like the perfect date husband." I tell him and follow him to the trunk where he pulls out a blanket.

We sit under that tree until it is pitch black outside and we can see nothing but the stars. We talk some and stay silent at other times but after all of the drama since we got together it is perfect. Jasper and I have really been through the ringer since we got together but that must mean that things will be smooth from here on out.


	19. From pain there is beauty

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

Authors note at the end.

Christmas Eve

In the 5 months since the shooting everything has changed. My mom and dad moved to Texas shocker well it was for me. Angela is in a psychiatric ward for the criminally insane I can see how hurt Edward is but I don't know what to do. I have been in counseling since about a month after the shooting it has helped. My best friend is large and I mean large and in charge big pregnant with a little girl that I can't wait to meet her.

Tomorrow is our second wedding anniversary and I have one hell of a gift for him. My dad has really taken to Texas life he is hunting and fishing with Jasper and his dad, even Edward when he is around. Edward started a program to become a drug and alcohol counselor we are all proud of him. I have paintings been shown right now at a gallery in Austin and my last collection sold out all to one buyer.

We have a huge tree decorated outside and one in our house. Jasper and I are going to cerebrate on our own and then have dinner with everyone Christmas night. I finished Jasper's present last night and I hope he will be happy. Jasper and I are sitting in the swing on the front porch under a blanket.

"Are you happy baby?" Jasper asks laying his hand on my leg. I turn to look at him and smile nodding.

"Deliriously so husband. Are you happy?" I ask him looking up to his face and he looks calm which over time I have come to realize that means he is happy.

"How could I not be happy? I have a beautiful wife who does everything in her power to make me happy, an amazing job both of them, a great family and a simple life. It is everything I have ever wanted and one day we will have a bunch of little humans running around here making it crazy or not. Either way you are more than I could have ever wished for." Jasper says to me before leaning forward and kissing me.

"I never thought that I could be so happy with the simple things but you make it all great. When I was young I dreamed or a fast paced high power career. I never thought about marriage really I wasn't one of those girls but I am glad that I didn't because no dream could live up to you." I say and look down at my watch its just after midnight. It's officially Christmas. I get up and get the small box I have for him and bring it to him. He looks at me quizzically but takes the box.

"Happy anniversary babe." I tell him and sit back down next to him taking my part of the blanket back over my lap Jasper leans back and toys with the box. He looks up at me again not moving to open the box.

"Open it." I tell him and he takes the corner of the paper and pulls it up and peels the paper back. He opens the lid and I hold my breath waiting for his reaction. He picks up the paper that is inside the box. Watching his face as he stares at the paper that is inside the box makes my chest constrict.

"Oh Bella this is the best thing that has happened since you said you would be my wife." Jasper says grabbing me and pulling me to him. Christmas will always be a happy holiday for us no matter what happens in the future. I hold onto him as hard as he holds me as we stand in the middle of our living room. I am not sure how long we stand there holding on for dear life.

"Are all of my Christmas presents this exciting?" Jasper asks me stepping back and I smile up at him because I don't know if anything I could have ever done for him or do for him could top this.

"I don't know but that will have to wait. Take me to bed please husband I am exhausted." I tell him wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing him. Jasper bends down and picks me up off the ground and I wrap my legs around his waist. He trots down the hall to our room. I laugh when he sits me down on the bed gently.

Jasper POV

5 years later

Today is Bella and I's 7th anniversary. Everyone is still asleep while I am wide awake sitting on the porch with my cup of coffee. As a kid I like many kids loved Christmas but since Bella that joy over the holiday has grown very much. I never knew that a walk-in tattoo could have changed my life this way but thank god she chose my shop. Not everything for us has been sunshine and rainbows but who's life has been. I hear the screen door shut and see my beautiful wife in her sweat pants my hoodie and warm socks.

"Hey baby, sorry if I woke you up." I tell her quietly as she comes toward me. She is by far the most beautiful woman I have ever met. She sits next to me and curls her legs up in the swing beside her. I lean back and pull her against me. Over the years our quiet moments have become shorter and harder to catch we soak them up when we get them. Bella snuggles into my side wrapping her arm across my middle.

"You know I don't sleep well alone." She says quietly and I kiss her head. I know but I was awake and hate staying in bed awake. We sit in silence and watch the sunrise. When we added to the house we made the porch wrap around the house. I hear knocking around in the house and start laughing. Bella sits up poking me in the ribs.

"Shhhhh I was enjoying this alone time Jasper." Bella says to me as I hear the front door open. Bella gives me side eye when I let out another chuckle. I hear feet hit the deck and wrap my arm around Bella and lean us back. I have to hold back the chuckle we don't get any alone time but I love it none the less.

I look up about the time our second child comes screeching around the corner he is hell on wheels our wild one. Conner is all piss and vinegar a lot like me as a kid. He has a curly stalk of blonde hair on his head and light blue eyes. I wink at him when we make eye contact and he runs straight toward Bella and I. We have 4 kids now our oldest being 4 and a baby just a 3 months old. Mom makes the comment that we have been busy every chance she gets making Charlie turn red. Conner jumps at the swing and I catch him just before he hits the porch. I hear the sigh of my wife beside me and I know she is shaking her head. Life is pretty chaotic nowadays with the kids, ranch, shop and living we don't have much spare time. Bella and I bounce back and forth between the shop and the ranch most days and the kids stay with my mom or hers although Conner is now in Pre-K half of the day which he doesn't like. Right on time our youngest and only little girl cries from her crib. I smile over at my wife and lean over to kiss her and stand with Conner in my arms.

"I got her babe its time to feed her anyway. I enjoyed our moment this morning though. Could you get the boys some breakfast going?" Bella says to me standing next to me. I nod in agreement and follow her into the house to do just that. Our life is a lot different then it was 5 years ago. Edward is married now to a woman that he met in school named Jane she is pregnant right now with their first child. Edward decided after everything with Angela that he wanted to be a crisis counselor and applied to collage. Jane is nice but standoffish and her first family event with us she looked shocked throughout dinner. I was honestly surprised she ever came back. Emmett and Rose have a football team almost with 6 kids and she is pregnant again they fuck like rabbits apparently but are loving every second of it. Charlie and Renee are both loving Texas. Charlie started at the county sheriffs here and is happy with it. Renee is our manager at the shop and she is damn good at it. My pops passed last year with has been hard on us all but mom is well enough.

"Daddy." The tiny voice of my oldest son snaps me out of memory he is standing to my side in the kitchen.

"Yeah buddy whats up?" I ask him squatting so I am on his level. He is a perfect mix of Bella and I but he is mine all the way temperament wise.

"Why does sissy get momma more then me?" He asks and I have to stifle a laugh because how do I really explain this to an almost 5 year old.

"Because you are a big boy and need momma less that your baby sister. She needs someone to do everything for her and you don't. Why don't you grab the stool and help me whip up some pancakes?" I tell him patting his head and standing. Him and I make pancakes in harmony he is to grown up for his age. Mom says that is how I was too far to old to be so young. I get all three boys sat down at the table and plates made when Bella comes in the kitchen with our little girl I smile at the sight.

"Don't look at me like that Whitlock. Thank you for breakfast." She says sitting in her spot at the table just before I get there with our plates. I shake my head at her and lean over to kiss her cheek making her blush.

"You are a Whitlock too ya know and that means I can look at you however I like. Happy Anniversary Wife." I tell her smiling because even after 7 years I don't get tired of calling her my wife. We eat our breakfast in complete chaos as is the usual in our house get dressed and head to moms. I took our gifts over yesterday and cant wait to open them all. Christmas has always been my favorite holiday and my wife made that so much better when she said yes and now with the kids I love it even more.

Bella POV

Sitting in Mom's living room missing Sherman feels strange but this is our new normal. Gracie is fussy and so I get up while everyone is opening presents and walk her around. 4 kids man who would have thought that we would have 4. I was so happy when I found out I was pregnant with Connor but so scared. My pregnancy with him was fine aside from the occasional puking. Every time I got pregnant I thanked God and prayed that we would be okay. Life with 4 kids and 2 businesses is crazy but I wouldn't want it any other way. I am lost in thought when I feel a hand grab my arm. I stratle and look up to find Edward. Him and I have gotten closer over the years but not by much I am still leary and for the most part he keeps his distance. Jasper and Edward though have made amends and the spend a bit of time together.

"Sorry Bella I didn't mean to scare you but you were in lala land and I didn't want to bump into you." Edward says pulling his hand back away from my arm.

"Thanks I was a bit lost in my own head." I smile and look down at the sleeping baby in my arms. She has her head on my chest mouth open just a bit with drool. This is the life.

"I was looking for Jane have you seen her. She wasn't feeling well and went to lay down but I checked my old room and she isn't there." Edward says and his face is pulled into a concerned frown. I shake my head and look down the hall to the bathroom the light is on. I hand Gracie toward her Uncle who takes her no questions asked. As weird as my relationship is with him he loves our kids. I head down toward the bathroom and knock.

"No, Edward just go away." I here the strained voice of Jane come through the door.

"It's not Edward Jane I just want to make sure you're okay your husband is looking for you and is worried." I tell her knowing that Jane is still a bit skittish around all of us. I hear her knocking around and then the door opens a fraction. The way Jane looks surprises me she is usually so well put together but this look I recognize well. Jane is sweaty and I don't mean a little sweat I mean the hair around her face is wet. She is red in the face and panting. I grab the door and push my way in shutting the door behind me.

"How long has it been hon?" I ask Jane taking her hand she is almost doubled over. She looks up at me and her eyes are wide she shakes her head.

"I don't know. I was a sleep and I felt a sharp pain in my side I got up and came in here but when I sat down on the toilet it felt better so I just sat here. The pain is getting worse but I don't want to ruin anyones day Bella I will be fine." Jane says wobbling back over to sit on the closed toilet seat. I shake my head because she is just as self doubting as Edward.

"Okay sweetheart we need to get you up and to the hospital also for future reference the birth of a baby could NEVER ruin a holiday. You are part of this family Jane and we love you. Now come on lets get you up and out of here so I can meet a new niece or nephew today." I smile at her and help her off the toilet. When we walk into the family room there is a flourish of activity. Jane surprises me by asking if I will come in the room with her and my mom takes the kids to her house so Jasper and I can go to the hospital.

8 hours later I have a niece and mom and baby are perfect the name her Analeise Dawn. This might be the coolest Christmas present ever. When all is said and done Jasper and I go home to let the new parents enjoy the baby. We decide to stay at my parents so we don't have to wake the kids. We go into the spare room and get in bed. Today was perfect and even though life has its rough spots it is worth all the pain and heartache for days as beautiful as today.

FIN.

A/N : I hope that you have enjoyed this Bella and Jasper as much as I have. This is the end for them as of right now I have no plans of writing anymore of them. However I may write a Jane/Edward from this story we will see. Thank you everyone who stuck with this story form the start and thank you anyone who reads it at all. I am truly grateful.


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